The Other Rules (1/2)
Title: Rule One
Author: bookdragon01
Fandom: ST XI
Characters: Giotto, OC redshirts
Genre: Humor/Adventure
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: none
Summary: Being in charge of Security means teaching people the Rules and enforcing them...
Disclaimer: I don't own Star Trek, just some a few phasers.
Note: in TOS Giotto was a lot closer to Pike's age than Kirk's, so the Giotto here is not Cupcake. My version is a career officer, the 'old veteran' on a ship full of 20-somethings.
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Cmdr. Sam Giotto paced slowly, and in his most disapproving manner, around the young ensign standing at rigid attention in his office. "Now let me get this straight, Ensign. For the second time in as many weeks, a fight has broken out on board this ship and in each instance you threw the first punch. Is that correct?"
"No sir," The ensign answered flatly.
Giotto could feel his eyebrows climb. "No? Are you saying that your crewmates are lying about you initiating those brawls?"
"Sir, no sir," she snapped out.
"Then how exactly is it that you just denied throwing the first punch?" he demanded.
Her chin lifted slightly. "I almost never to lead with a punch. Too predictable. Sir."
He briefly closed his eyes, searching for strength. If anyone was finally going to drive him to retirement, it was going to be Margolis. She was as literal-minded as Cmdr. Spock with absolutely none of his cool-headed reserve. He began again. "Nevertheless, Ensign, am I correct in understanding that in both incidents you did issue the first blow?"
"Yes sir." She almost sounded proud.
That would never do. He got right in her face, assuming his best drill instructor voice. "Margolis, do you know the two most important rules for security personnel?"
"Sir, yes sir." She came even more rigidly to attention. "Rule 1: If at all possible, avoid a fight. Rule 2: If you must fight, make it quick and decisive. Sir."
"Very good." He backed away slightly. "Now can you tell me what could possibly have possessed you to break the first rule twice?" That no one should ever have to fight on the Enterprise unless someone actually invaded was left unspoken.
Margolis licked her lips self-consciously. "Mr. Riley, sir."
"Mr. Riley? Did he threaten you, Ensign?" Giotto put as much sarcasm as possible into the question. While a competent engineer and navigator, Riley was hardly a threat. Margolis, on the other hand, despite being about 50 kilos soaking wet, had once left a Klingon rolling on the ground moaning something that Giotto strongly suspected had been a call for his mommy.
"No, he just wouldn't shut up." Her eyes flashed with remembered anger before she recalled where she was. "Sir."
"So you decided to shut him up," Sam stated evenly. "What could he possibly have been saying to provoke you to break the rules?"
"Not saying, sir." She very carefully kept eyes forward and focused on some point just over Giotto's left shoulder. "Singing."
"Singing, Ensign?" Giotto had heard Riley sing. It was in fact plausible that a person could be tempted toward violence, but he was certainly not going to admit that right now.
Margolis looked at least a little embarrassed. "Specifically, I'll Take You Home Again Kathleen. Sir."
Sam very narrowly restrained himself from laughing. While it was clear that Kathleen Margolis had a (he sincerely hoped) unrequited crush on the captain, he had long suspected that Lt. Riley had a similar crush on the ensign. If so, Riley was going about gaining her attention in entirely the wrong manner. Giotto firmly reminded himself that Starfleet was not paying him to be a relationship counselor and returned to the problem at hand (after throwing a quick prayer to any deities listening to help him get through this without snickering).
He assumed his best game face. "Ensign, I understand that Mr. Riley is highly unlikely to be invited to join the 4 Tenors at any point in the foreseeable future, HOWEVER, I hope that you understand that I cannot tolerate having someone on my team who can be provoked to lose control by a song. Do we understand each other?"
"Sir, yes sir." She had the good grace to look truly abashed.
"Very good." He paused for what he hoped would seem to the ensign like an interminably long moment. "Dismissed."
After the doors closed behind her, Sam forced himself to count very slowly to ten before collapsing in his chair and giving in to a fit of laughter.
AN: Lt. Kevin Riley appears in several TOS episodes, including The Naked Time, in which he takes over the ship's comm. system and sings I'll Take You Home Again Kathleen until most of the crew is ready to kill him.
Author: bookdragon01
Fandom: ST XI
Characters: Giotto, OC redshirts
Genre: Humor/Adventure
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: none
Summary: Being in charge of Security means teaching people the Rules and enforcing them...
Disclaimer: I don't own Star Trek, just some a few phasers.
Note: in TOS Giotto was a lot closer to Pike's age than Kirk's, so the Giotto here is not Cupcake. My version is a career officer, the 'old veteran' on a ship full of 20-somethings.
--------------------------------------------
Cmdr. Sam Giotto paced slowly, and in his most disapproving manner, around the young ensign standing at rigid attention in his office. "Now let me get this straight, Ensign. For the second time in as many weeks, a fight has broken out on board this ship and in each instance you threw the first punch. Is that correct?"
"No sir," The ensign answered flatly.
Giotto could feel his eyebrows climb. "No? Are you saying that your crewmates are lying about you initiating those brawls?"
"Sir, no sir," she snapped out.
"Then how exactly is it that you just denied throwing the first punch?" he demanded.
Her chin lifted slightly. "I almost never to lead with a punch. Too predictable. Sir."
He briefly closed his eyes, searching for strength. If anyone was finally going to drive him to retirement, it was going to be Margolis. She was as literal-minded as Cmdr. Spock with absolutely none of his cool-headed reserve. He began again. "Nevertheless, Ensign, am I correct in understanding that in both incidents you did issue the first blow?"
"Yes sir." She almost sounded proud.
That would never do. He got right in her face, assuming his best drill instructor voice. "Margolis, do you know the two most important rules for security personnel?"
"Sir, yes sir." She came even more rigidly to attention. "Rule 1: If at all possible, avoid a fight. Rule 2: If you must fight, make it quick and decisive. Sir."
"Very good." He backed away slightly. "Now can you tell me what could possibly have possessed you to break the first rule twice?" That no one should ever have to fight on the Enterprise unless someone actually invaded was left unspoken.
Margolis licked her lips self-consciously. "Mr. Riley, sir."
"Mr. Riley? Did he threaten you, Ensign?" Giotto put as much sarcasm as possible into the question. While a competent engineer and navigator, Riley was hardly a threat. Margolis, on the other hand, despite being about 50 kilos soaking wet, had once left a Klingon rolling on the ground moaning something that Giotto strongly suspected had been a call for his mommy.
"No, he just wouldn't shut up." Her eyes flashed with remembered anger before she recalled where she was. "Sir."
"So you decided to shut him up," Sam stated evenly. "What could he possibly have been saying to provoke you to break the rules?"
"Not saying, sir." She very carefully kept eyes forward and focused on some point just over Giotto's left shoulder. "Singing."
"Singing, Ensign?" Giotto had heard Riley sing. It was in fact plausible that a person could be tempted toward violence, but he was certainly not going to admit that right now.
Margolis looked at least a little embarrassed. "Specifically, I'll Take You Home Again Kathleen. Sir."
Sam very narrowly restrained himself from laughing. While it was clear that Kathleen Margolis had a (he sincerely hoped) unrequited crush on the captain, he had long suspected that Lt. Riley had a similar crush on the ensign. If so, Riley was going about gaining her attention in entirely the wrong manner. Giotto firmly reminded himself that Starfleet was not paying him to be a relationship counselor and returned to the problem at hand (after throwing a quick prayer to any deities listening to help him get through this without snickering).
He assumed his best game face. "Ensign, I understand that Mr. Riley is highly unlikely to be invited to join the 4 Tenors at any point in the foreseeable future, HOWEVER, I hope that you understand that I cannot tolerate having someone on my team who can be provoked to lose control by a song. Do we understand each other?"
"Sir, yes sir." She had the good grace to look truly abashed.
"Very good." He paused for what he hoped would seem to the ensign like an interminably long moment. "Dismissed."
After the doors closed behind her, Sam forced himself to count very slowly to ten before collapsing in his chair and giving in to a fit of laughter.
AN: Lt. Kevin Riley appears in several TOS episodes, including The Naked Time, in which he takes over the ship's comm. system and sings I'll Take You Home Again Kathleen until most of the crew is ready to kill him.