At what age do you allow your child privacy in his or her own room? When do you begin knocking on their door before entering? Do you enter when the child is not home
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when I was 13, my dad walked in on me whilst I was putting on my new bra in my room. He always knocked since that day. And we never spoke of it again *shudders*
I can beat that!! My grandmother was visiting and I walked in on her....in MY room (she was staying in my room, I was sleeping on the couch. I got home from school earlier than usual and went to get a book from my room and...yeah). ::swallows bleach::
Haha to be fair, my mom *is* my grandmother, but she raised me and I have always called her mom.
She's Finnish, and has no body issues whatsoever, so she's always just walked around naked. It's hard to explain to your friends why your 60 year old mom is lounging in her bedroom sans clothes and why they just saw her naked ass. Ugh.
Totally agree. It's all about respect. If you can't feel safe and secure in your own home, where else can you? Everybody needs their own space, and somewhere to "hide out". If you just go barging in, they'll lose that security in their own home, which sucks.
And to add about adults living in your house; They deserve the same amount of privacy as anybody else, whether they live there or not. If they were my kids, I would expect them to help out around the house somewhat (pick up after yourself), and I have a house rule about no phone calls after 9pm, so I would enforce that for them too. If they had a cell phone, I don't care if they use it as long as I can't hear it after 9pm. Otherwise, I would let them come and go as they please.
I knock now, and my son is 2.5, I just think it's hysterical how he says "Hello???" when I knock hehe. It never really occurred to me.
I think by default I do the "walking knock" if I'm going through any closed door with someone behind it.
As far as when he gets older, I think he privacy is earned through trust. If I was worried he was into something dangerous, I'd have no qualms about snooping. I think it depends on the kid, and the circumstances.
At 6, my son is allowed to close his door. We knock before going in, mostly because we want him to get into the habit of knocking on our door before he comes in if it's closed. I do go in there, but he's 6, there isn't anything I'm worried about in there.
I would like to think I won't be the kind of parent who snoops, because my mom did that on a consistent basis, and it was both embarrassing and angering.
I think that at a certain age we just have to trust our kids. Now, if it's a situation where you suspect drugs, then yes, at any age you can go in there and tear that place apart. But other than that, I don't think it's a parents right to just snoop.
I would assume that my adult child staying with me can take care of himself and I would treat him as such.
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My mum knocked since I was about 13 too.
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She's Finnish, and has no body issues whatsoever, so she's always just walked around naked. It's hard to explain to your friends why your 60 year old mom is lounging in her bedroom sans clothes and why they just saw her naked ass. Ugh.
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And to add about adults living in your house; They deserve the same amount of privacy as anybody else, whether they live there or not. If they were my kids, I would expect them to help out around the house somewhat (pick up after yourself), and I have a house rule about no phone calls after 9pm, so I would enforce that for them too. If they had a cell phone, I don't care if they use it as long as I can't hear it after 9pm. Otherwise, I would let them come and go as they please.
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I think by default I do the "walking knock" if I'm going through any closed door with someone behind it.
As far as when he gets older, I think he privacy is earned through trust. If I was worried he was into something dangerous, I'd have no qualms about snooping. I think it depends on the kid, and the circumstances.
Reply
I would like to think I won't be the kind of parent who snoops, because my mom did that on a consistent basis, and it was both embarrassing and angering.
I think that at a certain age we just have to trust our kids. Now, if it's a situation where you suspect drugs, then yes, at any age you can go in there and tear that place apart. But other than that, I don't think it's a parents right to just snoop.
I would assume that my adult child staying with me can take care of himself and I would treat him as such.
Reply
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