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It really sucks when you go to the mausoleum to visit your best friend and wind up stumbling (literally) over another grave of someone you went to school with....What's weird is I didn't even know her well at all, just kinda one of those people you grew up with b/c you went to the same school most of your lives together, but ever since that day at the mausoleum I've thought more about her than I did when she was alive =(
Since I couldn't get a phone call back from a supposid "friend" about her death, I looked it up on the internet and found out she died at 21 of a respiratory infection...crazy, She went to school in Lafayette (a senior) and when she felt sick on Thursday night she drove home to Destrehan on Friday. Her mom took her to the clinic when she got worse and once she got there they called the ambulance. The next morning she died....
It really is terrifying to look back on how many people I've gone to school with that have died since graduation (Renee, Ben, Brad, Lindsey) and that's just the one's that I KNOW of...Thinking of these people and how their lives were ended so quickly makes me absolutely HATE the fact that people I still care about (and worry about just about every day) won't just let things be...I know if I have to put anyone else in the ground it's gonna kill me (or make me go insane again) and that thought scares me so much.
I drove home from my dad's the other night and took Earhart. I ended up passing a crime scene and saw this guy lying dead in his own puddle of blood....Everyone was just standing around him gaucking...I felt so bad for him on so many different levels. I dont know why he was shot or even if it had to do with drugs (which my parents both suggested) but either way I felt sick...I watched the news to see what had happened and apparently he had been shot in the head and torso while waiting for the bus, about ten minutes before I had driven past there...How's your night NOT supposed to be shitty after seeing that?
It's not that I'm sitting here waiting for something bad to happen, it's that I'm worried that if/when it does I'll be filled with so many regrets (like last time) that I wont be able to take it...
I dont know if any of you know what I'm even trying to say, but for some reason I felt like I needed to say it...
Since I couldn't get a phone call back from a supposid "friend" about her death, I looked it up on the internet and found out she died at 21 of a respiratory infection...crazy, She went to school in Lafayette (a senior) and when she felt sick on Thursday night she drove home to Destrehan on Friday. Her mom took her to the clinic when she got worse and once she got there they called the ambulance. The next morning she died....
It really is terrifying to look back on how many people I've gone to school with that have died since graduation (Renee, Ben, Brad, Lindsey) and that's just the one's that I KNOW of...Thinking of these people and how their lives were ended so quickly makes me absolutely HATE the fact that people I still care about (and worry about just about every day) won't just let things be...I know if I have to put anyone else in the ground it's gonna kill me (or make me go insane again) and that thought scares me so much.
I drove home from my dad's the other night and took Earhart. I ended up passing a crime scene and saw this guy lying dead in his own puddle of blood....Everyone was just standing around him gaucking...I felt so bad for him on so many different levels. I dont know why he was shot or even if it had to do with drugs (which my parents both suggested) but either way I felt sick...I watched the news to see what had happened and apparently he had been shot in the head and torso while waiting for the bus, about ten minutes before I had driven past there...How's your night NOT supposed to be shitty after seeing that?
It's not that I'm sitting here waiting for something bad to happen, it's that I'm worried that if/when it does I'll be filled with so many regrets (like last time) that I wont be able to take it...
I dont know if any of you know what I'm even trying to say, but for some reason I felt like I needed to say it...