fucking hell...
this has been the worst mother fucking week of my life!!!!! i don't even know where to begin... my heart feels like its been ripped out, stomped on, and then torn to pieces... i've never cried so fucking hard and for such a long period of time in all my life! i had an anxiety attack last night, thats the fucking NINTH one this year... they scare me so bad... my sister was even freaking out last night... i tried so hard not to fucking drown myself in the bathtub... i feel like i have no reason to be here anymore... i just want to run far far away, and never fucking come back! every time i see a picture of you, i cry! everytime i hear a song that reminds me of you, i cry! i've NEVER felt like this about someone before... you were special to me... but yet im a fucking nobody to you, and you lead me on... you say you think we would make better friends, but i can't possibly still be your friend... im to hurt! i feel numb! i don't want to do anything, but sleep... i can't fucking eat, but don't worry... thats not just b/c of you... i think i have another fucking olser... this stress is way to much for me... i can't take it anymore! i don't know what else to write...