The Make-Out Seat
The new LI double R trains are equipped with several nifty items - coat racks, LED signs, funky-feeling arm rests. Yet when looking in the front right corner, it’s clear that the designers were left scratching their heads about what to make it. The result is awkward, clumsy, half passenger space, half train operation. It’s what would be called a jump seat if it were on an airplane. On the train, it best be called the make-out seat.
It’s quite an odd seat, really. An architectural anomaly in a void that simply couldn’t be filled, this seat is at least 10 feet from any other passenger. It’s one of the fold-down kinds, so nobody really even knows it’s there. Behind you are door operating buttons. In front of you, you’ll be pleased to notice, is (to my knowledge) the only cup holder in the entire train car. It’s quiet, it’s roomy, and best of all there’s no one to see you.
After all, you all know the drill. It’s been a long night in the city. You’re both buzzed and your girl’s bringin’ sexy back. It’s a long ride home and only, if only, there wasn’t an audience. Fortunately, this seat has only one sightline. You’ll see the dotted line in the diagram below allows for a reflection of you to be seen by one lucky pervert back in the main part of the car. Luckily, there’s another anomaly in this quirky corner. Reach up to the top of the front window and pull down the opaque sun visor. It’s only one foot long but if you put it at its lowest position it transforms into a convenient reflection blocker.
Now you have a several second warning before any unsuspecting visitor arrives. Ticketers will be delayed by the doors to enter from the front, and the last ticket click behind you is at least four paces away and around a corner. And of course, if it gets too steamy, the window to your left happens to be the only window on the train that actually opens.
Please keep in mind all of this is theoretical, as I have been single since my discovery of the make-out seat. Yet even as a single occupant, it’s my preferred method of travel since I found it. Of course finding it is the trickiest part. On restroom cars (those cars that have four digit odd numbers on their outside) head toward the end furthest from the restroom. In the even cars, the make-out seat is located at the end adjacent to the make-out seat in the restroom car. Confusing, I know, but well worth it. And remember; please help us with our clean train campaign, and deposit all garbage in the receptacles on the station platforms.
It’s quite an odd seat, really. An architectural anomaly in a void that simply couldn’t be filled, this seat is at least 10 feet from any other passenger. It’s one of the fold-down kinds, so nobody really even knows it’s there. Behind you are door operating buttons. In front of you, you’ll be pleased to notice, is (to my knowledge) the only cup holder in the entire train car. It’s quiet, it’s roomy, and best of all there’s no one to see you.
After all, you all know the drill. It’s been a long night in the city. You’re both buzzed and your girl’s bringin’ sexy back. It’s a long ride home and only, if only, there wasn’t an audience. Fortunately, this seat has only one sightline. You’ll see the dotted line in the diagram below allows for a reflection of you to be seen by one lucky pervert back in the main part of the car. Luckily, there’s another anomaly in this quirky corner. Reach up to the top of the front window and pull down the opaque sun visor. It’s only one foot long but if you put it at its lowest position it transforms into a convenient reflection blocker.
Now you have a several second warning before any unsuspecting visitor arrives. Ticketers will be delayed by the doors to enter from the front, and the last ticket click behind you is at least four paces away and around a corner. And of course, if it gets too steamy, the window to your left happens to be the only window on the train that actually opens.
Please keep in mind all of this is theoretical, as I have been single since my discovery of the make-out seat. Yet even as a single occupant, it’s my preferred method of travel since I found it. Of course finding it is the trickiest part. On restroom cars (those cars that have four digit odd numbers on their outside) head toward the end furthest from the restroom. In the even cars, the make-out seat is located at the end adjacent to the make-out seat in the restroom car. Confusing, I know, but well worth it. And remember; please help us with our clean train campaign, and deposit all garbage in the receptacles on the station platforms.