holy crap, an update!
so here's the thing. About two weeks ago, my dad had a heart attack. (bio, not Cam, for those of you playing along at home) Yesterday, he had another. This morning, they should be going in and putting in the stents that they didn't think were necessary two weeks ago. It is
extremely difficult for me to not be able to do anything about it from here. for the second time in two weeks, he's sitting in a hospital alone halfway across the country, and I simply cannot get to him. Jeannavie is working, and has been calling me six times a day to bitch about something she can't do, or someone else won't do, which frankly, isn't helpful. Tavie will not leave the bayou. period. and I just can't get there. and it makes me feel terrible, but what the hell can I do about it?
So I cried most of the day yesterday. and then gene tried to make me laugh, and that'd last for about ten minutes, and i'd start crying some more, and then i'd have a panic attack, and it was all just... well, if you're not ass deep in it, I imagine it's pretty funny. and right now it feels like my support system consists almost entirely of gene. and michelle. and niema, too, i guess, but she's kind of in the middle of her own shit, and i dunno. it's just... when I feel crappy, I really don't feel like there's *anyone* I can talk to right now, and certainly not anyone who can make time for me if i were to actually ask. which is a really lousy feeling.
So you try to focus on positive stuff, which for me, will probably always be throwing myself ass over teakettle into jase-stuff. he's super-psyched about summer reading. we went to harvest on tuesday to eyeball their selection before we're forced to trudge out to like, borders or somewhere where you have to pay full price for a book, and actually came up with seven-- four independent reading books and three read-togethers (if you're interested, gene and jase will be reading Pippi Longstocking; Jase and I will be reading Lemony Snicket, and we will be taking turns with a Wayside School book; independent reading so far will be Frog and Toad Together, Nate the Great, Junie B. First Grader at Last, and John Henry)
you realise there's some grand miscarriage of literary justice, though, when you're digging through a box of children's books trying to find something age appropriate, and you come to the conclusion that the real tragedy is not that Sounder was shot, but that Frog and Toad were not. I HATE FROG AND TOAD.
consequently, anyone with children-experience who has any suggestions for independent reading, I'd love to hear it-- Frog and Toad was on his summer reading list, and he read that in about twenty minutes, and had pretty good comprehension. (book psycho that I am, we are making him worksheets to fill out to make sure he's not just doing word-recognition but actually READING) and at that rate, well, there aren't that many good books on his summer reading list, and most of them, frankly, suck, or are way below his level)
Also, and unrelatedly to all of that, as my hair reaches the middle of my back in the middle of the summer, it's driving me nuts, and i'm considering having it braided so as not to hack it all off. thoughts, opinions, on the shape of my face and such for that endeavor?
so there's all that. I guess summing up this little novella, anything else going on, I've either forgotten or intentionally omitted so as not to be chided.
extremely difficult for me to not be able to do anything about it from here. for the second time in two weeks, he's sitting in a hospital alone halfway across the country, and I simply cannot get to him. Jeannavie is working, and has been calling me six times a day to bitch about something she can't do, or someone else won't do, which frankly, isn't helpful. Tavie will not leave the bayou. period. and I just can't get there. and it makes me feel terrible, but what the hell can I do about it?
So I cried most of the day yesterday. and then gene tried to make me laugh, and that'd last for about ten minutes, and i'd start crying some more, and then i'd have a panic attack, and it was all just... well, if you're not ass deep in it, I imagine it's pretty funny. and right now it feels like my support system consists almost entirely of gene. and michelle. and niema, too, i guess, but she's kind of in the middle of her own shit, and i dunno. it's just... when I feel crappy, I really don't feel like there's *anyone* I can talk to right now, and certainly not anyone who can make time for me if i were to actually ask. which is a really lousy feeling.
So you try to focus on positive stuff, which for me, will probably always be throwing myself ass over teakettle into jase-stuff. he's super-psyched about summer reading. we went to harvest on tuesday to eyeball their selection before we're forced to trudge out to like, borders or somewhere where you have to pay full price for a book, and actually came up with seven-- four independent reading books and three read-togethers (if you're interested, gene and jase will be reading Pippi Longstocking; Jase and I will be reading Lemony Snicket, and we will be taking turns with a Wayside School book; independent reading so far will be Frog and Toad Together, Nate the Great, Junie B. First Grader at Last, and John Henry)
you realise there's some grand miscarriage of literary justice, though, when you're digging through a box of children's books trying to find something age appropriate, and you come to the conclusion that the real tragedy is not that Sounder was shot, but that Frog and Toad were not. I HATE FROG AND TOAD.
consequently, anyone with children-experience who has any suggestions for independent reading, I'd love to hear it-- Frog and Toad was on his summer reading list, and he read that in about twenty minutes, and had pretty good comprehension. (book psycho that I am, we are making him worksheets to fill out to make sure he's not just doing word-recognition but actually READING) and at that rate, well, there aren't that many good books on his summer reading list, and most of them, frankly, suck, or are way below his level)
Also, and unrelatedly to all of that, as my hair reaches the middle of my back in the middle of the summer, it's driving me nuts, and i'm considering having it braided so as not to hack it all off. thoughts, opinions, on the shape of my face and such for that endeavor?
so there's all that. I guess summing up this little novella, anything else going on, I've either forgotten or intentionally omitted so as not to be chided.