A real-live update!
So I'm home from the hospital today. I came home with a shiny new *walker* which makes me feel like a giant TOOL. But, apparently, I'm just not steady enough on my feet to be allowed to use them all on my lonesome. Also, not allowed to bend over, shower without help, and have not only one of those grabby-hand-claw deals, but an honest-to-god bath-sponge-on-a-motherfucking-stick. for serious. I'm somewhere between laughing and crying hysterical about that.
There's that. I think I'm okay about it. THEY DO NOT KNOW WHY THE STROKE HAPPENED. They just don't know. They probably won't. My cholesterol is really good, my blood pressure is really good, everything is in really good shape. (Okay, I'm still fat, but I'm lacking pertinent risk factors) Sometimes, these things just happen. (even in australia) And, you know, I can be okay with that. Like, I don't want to be okay with that, but what the fuck do you do? It is what it is. I haven't cried at all through this whole process weirdly enough. I've come close a couple of times. When Gene came to visit, when my dad dropped off my bag, when they gave me the dag-blasted motherfucking wheelie-assed walker. So I guess I'm doing okay, or I'm in serious, serious denial.
A lot of people called, visited, texted, twittered, left LJ comments, and otherwise made me feel REALLY loved and cared about when I could otherwise be wallowing and feeling uber shitty about things, and guys, seriously, thanks. You can't even begin to know how much that means to me.
I'm looking forward to a lot of things in the upcoming weeks. Some forced time off from work, Physical Therapy, Hopefully spending time with people I don't usually get to see because I work all the time and I'm totally exhausted the rest of the time. Figuring out the walking without help thing again. Sleeping in my own bed. Getting all of the sticky-goo from the telemetry pads off of my skin. So there's really a whole lot.
In conclusion, I am home, whole and alive. My head still hurts really bad, but I'm doing better than I was last week, except for the mobility thing. And I'm intent on a 110% recovery. Because I'm that damned good.
There's that. I think I'm okay about it. THEY DO NOT KNOW WHY THE STROKE HAPPENED. They just don't know. They probably won't. My cholesterol is really good, my blood pressure is really good, everything is in really good shape. (Okay, I'm still fat, but I'm lacking pertinent risk factors) Sometimes, these things just happen. (even in australia) And, you know, I can be okay with that. Like, I don't want to be okay with that, but what the fuck do you do? It is what it is. I haven't cried at all through this whole process weirdly enough. I've come close a couple of times. When Gene came to visit, when my dad dropped off my bag, when they gave me the dag-blasted motherfucking wheelie-assed walker. So I guess I'm doing okay, or I'm in serious, serious denial.
A lot of people called, visited, texted, twittered, left LJ comments, and otherwise made me feel REALLY loved and cared about when I could otherwise be wallowing and feeling uber shitty about things, and guys, seriously, thanks. You can't even begin to know how much that means to me.
I'm looking forward to a lot of things in the upcoming weeks. Some forced time off from work, Physical Therapy, Hopefully spending time with people I don't usually get to see because I work all the time and I'm totally exhausted the rest of the time. Figuring out the walking without help thing again. Sleeping in my own bed. Getting all of the sticky-goo from the telemetry pads off of my skin. So there's really a whole lot.
In conclusion, I am home, whole and alive. My head still hurts really bad, but I'm doing better than I was last week, except for the mobility thing. And I'm intent on a 110% recovery. Because I'm that damned good.