May 12, 2007 19:57
hi everyone or maybe just myself,
i am indulging in a much too long study break after completing two out of three finals. (the last of which will be on monday!) even with one left to go, it feels as if summer is already upon me, because as kids scramble to cram for their remaining finals i am already thinking of being back in sunny socal without a car, but with a great desire to just see my friends and family. To say that these past months, or even this semester, were tumultous would be a drastic understatement..but with it, after much self doubt and insecurity, came a reestablished sense of independence. i'm ok. i'm ok with wanting and liking to study. i'm ok with wanting and liking to just drop everything drink a few beers and shake my ass. i'm ok with wanting to or having to eat lunch by myself even though everyone can see. i'm ok with getting angry sometimes and symapthizing more of the time. i'm ok with liking boba too much and listening to michelle branch when i'm feeling both down and up. i've developed insecurities that need not be there, and am working hard to rid myself of them. i'm also not as nearsighted. With the completion of my second year and the onset of the third, it seems as if life is coming at me faster than i can process it, and moments are just too fleeting sometimes. i'm starting mcat classes this summer, and will take it during the fall. i guess attempting to get into med school is finally being actualized. i also declared my major - i am a molecular and cell biology major, although it is unfortunate to say that at this point, i'd rather not be one. i've rekindled a botherly sisterly relationship with my brother that seemed to have ceased somewhere between elementary and middle school, and this makes me happy..and to think my parents think we don't even talk..haha...it's so reassuring to know that friends and family will be the people you can always turn to. and some things really are more important than school and grades - work hard but don't stress. on a lighter note..i've really come to enjoy indian food as well as hummus. (let's go have some!) oh berkeley, look what you have done. i'll be up north for the summer taking swim class, living in a new apartment, taking mcat classes, GOING TO SEE GOO GOO DOLL AS WELL AS DAFT PUNK, all while engaging in debauchery from time to time. I do really love college, and am kind of sad to think that this is in many ways, the beginning of the end. In two short years I am a completely different person, although the ever hopeful and maybe somewhat naive helen is and always will be there. Things never seem to turn out the way you expect - so don't ever expect! As the Beatles so aptly put it - Let it Be.