putting things to rest
It has been so difficult for me to recognize that many people I considered friends are just not anymore -- at least for now. They are all in stages of their lives where they're busy with what's around them and mine is a link that didn't carry over. Maybe I've been doing it too, but I am particularly aware of this because the network of people around me isn't really changing, as one would expect it to. I am not meeting a steady flow of peers and co-workers I can really connect with, and this is making what I lose so much more obvious.
Facebook is dragging out this mourning process for me terribly, and I am going to stop depressing myself by dwelling on it. I need to make myself stop caring about what everyone else is doing and just enjoy what I have until it's time to move on.
Which is to say, I'm pretty sure next summer will be when I'm moving on. I need to be making new friends and hanging out aand being appreciated regularly and doing things I don't have to force myself to do and losing my mind over more and more boys.
Although -- my dad has told me to come home like 16 times today, and this alone makes me want to stay far, far away. Don't expect me on the west coast, at any rate, if I even decide to go back to America.
Facebook is dragging out this mourning process for me terribly, and I am going to stop depressing myself by dwelling on it. I need to make myself stop caring about what everyone else is doing and just enjoy what I have until it's time to move on.
Which is to say, I'm pretty sure next summer will be when I'm moving on. I need to be making new friends and hanging out aand being appreciated regularly and doing things I don't have to force myself to do and losing my mind over more and more boys.
Although -- my dad has told me to come home like 16 times today, and this alone makes me want to stay far, far away. Don't expect me on the west coast, at any rate, if I even decide to go back to America.