(no subject)
If I could speak to Sam, this is what I would say:
First, I would shake her. I would do it hard enough to rattle her around, but not hard enough to make arms fall off or anything.
Next I would say this:
Sam, pretend you don't know me. Pretend we have never met. Listen to what I'm saying, not as Chris, you're manipulative, sex-hungry ex-boyfriend, but as someone trying to give you advice or perspective you may not have had before.
You need to open your eyes Sam. I don't think everyone is capable of opening their eyes like you are, like I am, or like millions of people around here have. But you are. You've seen things in this world you don't like, including things about yourself and shut your eyes against them so tightly that you've internalized them into yourself. The more tightly you shut your eyes, the more you believe your eyes are wide open. It's like if you were to shut your eyes as tightly as you can, and you start seeing all those wierd patterns. If those patterns were all you could see for enough time, and if all you could hear was the ringing in your ears for enough time, you might start to believe that it was reality. You might start to believe that all there was to the world was this senseless, meaningless chaos. You need to stop fighting the world that exists around you and start looking at it for what it is. Stop thinking about what it is that you need to do or accomplish to succeed. Look at a leaf, think about what it comes from. Think about how someone decided where all those veins should go. Think about who decided what the texture should feel like. Stop thinking about what's wrong with you and start looking at what is around you. The texture of a sheet of paper, the artistic design in a blade of grass or on the texture of a quilt.
You've built up a very nasty trick image that you're using to fool yourself. You're not taking responsibility for your choices or your actions. You're trying to blame those on other people, and then blaming their choices on your own God-created inadequacy. That's the slip in the logic. You feel like you're placing all the blame on yourself, and everyone else perceives it that way too. If you put all the blame on your choices, you would have no reason to be upset. People can change most choices fairly easily, or at least correct future ones and learn from their mistakes. But no one can change their God-given potential. You can never win against that, and that's why you haven't. That's why you need to open your eyes and get out of that box. It doesn't even take that much thought. You need to see what God (or whatever, the big bang if you prefer. You know I use the name "God" to define anything unknown that we can't possibly understand) has created. Even the ugly or frightening things, when one gets down to it, really are amazing in some way. You are no exception. You need to see what it is that makes everything else so amazing and then find that thing in yourself. It's there. It's there in everyone, whether or not they are still capable of opening their eyes to it. But it's not too late for you. There are still things that you see with your eyes open. Funny how music doesn't care whether or not you can see.
First, I would shake her. I would do it hard enough to rattle her around, but not hard enough to make arms fall off or anything.
Next I would say this:
Sam, pretend you don't know me. Pretend we have never met. Listen to what I'm saying, not as Chris, you're manipulative, sex-hungry ex-boyfriend, but as someone trying to give you advice or perspective you may not have had before.
You need to open your eyes Sam. I don't think everyone is capable of opening their eyes like you are, like I am, or like millions of people around here have. But you are. You've seen things in this world you don't like, including things about yourself and shut your eyes against them so tightly that you've internalized them into yourself. The more tightly you shut your eyes, the more you believe your eyes are wide open. It's like if you were to shut your eyes as tightly as you can, and you start seeing all those wierd patterns. If those patterns were all you could see for enough time, and if all you could hear was the ringing in your ears for enough time, you might start to believe that it was reality. You might start to believe that all there was to the world was this senseless, meaningless chaos. You need to stop fighting the world that exists around you and start looking at it for what it is. Stop thinking about what it is that you need to do or accomplish to succeed. Look at a leaf, think about what it comes from. Think about how someone decided where all those veins should go. Think about who decided what the texture should feel like. Stop thinking about what's wrong with you and start looking at what is around you. The texture of a sheet of paper, the artistic design in a blade of grass or on the texture of a quilt.
You've built up a very nasty trick image that you're using to fool yourself. You're not taking responsibility for your choices or your actions. You're trying to blame those on other people, and then blaming their choices on your own God-created inadequacy. That's the slip in the logic. You feel like you're placing all the blame on yourself, and everyone else perceives it that way too. If you put all the blame on your choices, you would have no reason to be upset. People can change most choices fairly easily, or at least correct future ones and learn from their mistakes. But no one can change their God-given potential. You can never win against that, and that's why you haven't. That's why you need to open your eyes and get out of that box. It doesn't even take that much thought. You need to see what God (or whatever, the big bang if you prefer. You know I use the name "God" to define anything unknown that we can't possibly understand) has created. Even the ugly or frightening things, when one gets down to it, really are amazing in some way. You are no exception. You need to see what it is that makes everything else so amazing and then find that thing in yourself. It's there. It's there in everyone, whether or not they are still capable of opening their eyes to it. But it's not too late for you. There are still things that you see with your eyes open. Funny how music doesn't care whether or not you can see.