Some things must be done
Hello! I am in New York. Despite being planned for months, and threatened for even longer, this is still coming as something of a surprise to me. I think it's something to do with the cultural shadow New York, and America in general, has cast over my viewing and reading habits - it is outright weird to see and hear things that, whilst completely commonplace and plausible, have until now only ever existed on the page or the screen.
I saw a fire hydrant earlier today and sort of wanted to pee on it because, well, that's the trope.
I can hear crickets right now - Queens is really quiet at night - and it makes me want to tell awful, unfunny jokes so that there will actually be the sound of crickets in the silence that follows.
On which subject, in the Hall of Primates in the Museum of Natural History today Sarah was remembering a gibbon we saw in Malaysia that would not keep still for her to take a photo.
"You've never been able to let that go, have you?" I said. "In fact you could say it's still... *remove imaginary sunglasses* unforgibbon."
*chirp* *chirp*
Yep, that's it. Perfect.
My first meal on American soil was a pastrami melt sandwich in Astro's Diner on Avenue of the Americas. It was good.
I had been in Manhattan less than an hour before I saw my first ironic hipster with an elaborate moustache. Shortly after that I saw a Pontiac Firebird with a gimp mask. I don't know what the deal was.
After Astro's we walked up to Central Park and strolled through it towards the aforementioned Natural History Museum. There were no ducks on Central Park lake; Sarah suggested the terrapins had eaten them all and sure enough the next thing we saw was a basking terrapin floating just below the surface.
The Museum of Natural History is huge; we spent an entire afternoon there and saw maybe a third of it. The dinosaur collections are particularly amazing. If I'd been there when I was six I'd probably have died of excitement, but as it is I think I managed to keep my dignity.
ZOMG DINOSAURS Allosaurus styracosaurus plesiosaurs giant therizinosaur claws and the world's meanest duck OH SO COOL AAAAAAHHHHH
My second meal on American soil was a pepperoni, onion and meatball pizza at Lombardi's, corner of Spring Street and Mott Street. It was no-kidding-holy-shit amazing.
On the way out we walked through the ten billion street food stalls that are out for the Festival of San Gennaro and had funnel cake for dessert. I bought it largely because I had no idea what it was; turns out it's batter mix poured straight out of a jug (or funnel) into hot oil, where it is fried until golden brown and delicious and served with icing sugar. Think unshaped churros, or really informal doughnuts.
On the way home we stopped off at the local corner shop, where I snagged a sixpack of Lagunitas American IPA for $11.
It was the best day ever.