Do you feel what I feel?

[bombaygin]

I wonder if I will ever stop crying from the tragedy in CT. Or if I will ever stop thinking of the stabbings in China. Or the children blown up daily in the middle east. Or all the injustice surrounding innocents all over the world

Comments

[batchix]

I don't think an eternal being or cosmic force thinks of death in the same way that we do. We mourn our loss because we are uncertain that we will ever see that person again. The loss of those times that we could have spent, the things that person could have done. I miss my grandma every day. I think about my older brother, who died when my mom fell down the stairs when she was pregnant... and my two little nieces who died at birth. It kills me that i didn't get to know them and be with them. But... I don't think they're in any pain where they are. I think they're probably pretty happy.

From what i've read of near death experiences- even my mom's experienced this- it seems like death itself, once you let go of this life, isn't so bad. It's a transition from this life to something else. I think most people are terrified at the moment of death. Scared of what if nothing comes. But when you pass, you probably understand something greater than what this world is. And trying to explain that is like trying to explain to an unborn child who's only known silence and warmth how much water skiing and heavy metal concerts are.

I know a lot of people find it odd, but i'm looking forward to that day. When I can finally lay down all the baggage i carry in this life and never worry about it again. I can lay down my responsibilities and disappointments and pain and regrets and just go, "it's out of my hands" and walk away without feeling guilty. I can lay down and rest. really rest.

My belief system is odd. I don't talk about it that much. I believe in the God that Christ spoke of, but i also believe that is just one face of whatever God is. I can't define God. God's more complex than I can understand... who am I to tell someone else what God is?

What gives me faith is that we haven't blown up the entire planet yet(and I mean right down to beaded glass. the animals and plants gone as well).

We have the ability and the stupidity to destroy ourselves on the whims of ambitious men, and yet little coincidental things keep it from happening. To me that's proof of God. That's proof of a higher power. Like babies, something keeps us from sticking our finger too far in the light socket. Something saves us from our own short sided stupidity.

[bombaygin]

Whenever someone closes to me passes, I mourn because of the sadness other people feel. I don't feel the loss, necessarily -- just the pain of everyone else around me. And I feel like a sponge, just soaking it up until my heart is utterly broken. I think of those families who have to live out their lives on earth without their children, their loved ones. And it's so utterly upsetting. I feel like I'm so weird, but there's got to be others who feel the same...

When I watched my Aunt Karen pass, it was glorious. Knowing the pain she carried in this world, of her broken body, would be gone. I don't know about the pain her spirit carried, but I like to think that all left her as well.

But I'm like you -- I'm very excited about my own death. Many people have asked me this week if I feel like the end is really coming. I look at them and just smile and say, "What a great adventure it'd be, right? To die?" And they all think I'm insane -- or at least look at me like I'm insane.

I used to believe in the God that Jesus spoke about. But in a way, that belief evolved and morphed into something else. Almost, in a way, Jesus was trying to explain God in a way that man would understand. And over time, that explanation hasn't changed, even though our minds can now fathom so much more than centuries past.

If Jesus were here today, how would he explain God in ways we could understand? Would it be the same story of all-power being in the sky? Or would it tell of stars and parallel universes, of lands where the laws of physics did not exist and we spend eons traveling these universes and becoming one with other souls.

I don't have faith in man itself. I know that like all other creatures, even the trees and grass, our time will be numbered. My faith resides out there, in places I cannot even begin to understand. It resides in the love of families, in the unconditional love my mother shows me. It resides in the impossible greatness of your mind, Sarah and the expanding love I have for you.

Maybe that's God.