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Jan 21, 2005 10:31

i've never felt so selfish in my life before.

last night, i broke up with kody because it wasn't what i wanted. he did nothing wrong. i mean, sometimes he kinda pissed me off and it bothered me that all he said was "i dont know," but... it just wasn't what i wanted. and i feel like the most selfish person in the world for it. i know he's hurting a lot. i know he loves me a lot. i took something from him that he could never get back and i just break up with him. fuck my life.

i asked him if he would still be my best friend and he said yes. i hope he's strong enough. god knows how much shit i've been through in my life with relationships and what not and i'm always the one that has gotten fucked over. and now i'm doing it to someone eles. i dont think anyone has any idea how bad i feel. this really sucks.

i hope he doesn't hate me.
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