(no subject)
do you ever wish oyou could change things from the past? i really really do...
- i wish i could change the way i ignored my best friends to hang out with my bf
- change the way i went off on logan
- the way ive always hated olivia for no apparent reason...wait i take that back
- the way i fell absolutly in love and now i am confused to hell
- how when i didnt do my homework for that one night and study to go out and have fun i got three nights of fun taken away in place of it
i wish so many fuckin things...and most of all if he doesnt come back i will die. i love him and i just dont feel like i know what is right anymore. this thanksgiving i dont know if i am going to my grandparents or not because of the stupid bickering that doesnt cease among the adults. and i just cant seem to maintain my grades...ugh... life is so frustrating. and i feel bad because i never hang out with my best freind but i ask for her help all of the time and i ask favors from her and i know it gets to her but i really do care and i love her with a passion. my parents suck...they have like a grounding fetish now, there like you sneezed your grounded! shit it sucks. and now i have this whole modeling thing and my coches are like you need to do the exercises that i give you and all of the homework or you will not succeed...n' my vocal coch is like you need to do your scales and practice your song. and in the midst of being grounded and modeling and vocals....i have no time left for shane. and now we are more like friends then we have ever been before and im going to die because hes not my friend hes my bf of 11 months....OMG so now we are both confused and we are on "time-out" or w/e and we both have a week to get our shit together and then if we want to get back together.... cheese and rice....... i cant believe this is happening. like if we dont get back together i will die. but at the same time life goes on, and i guess ill be ok but not, i hope we do. i think we will because once something is gone you relize how much you miss it and you want it back. i hop thats true....