Making Pleasure With Business
What makes the best relationships, I wonder? I think I might have solved such a puzzling question for myself by using an analogy of my job. Honestly, I think making the best (personal) relationship is like having the perfect Hot Chocolate:
You start out with a cup, being the meeting of two people, which is essentially your entire relationship. Obviously, if you don't have a cup, you can't make a drink; similarly, if you don't have someone, you haven't met them, they don't exist to you, there is no relationship.
After you meet this someone, you add some syrups. This is what kicks off the relationship, liking this person in general, just as an acquaintance. You can't possibly know, by now, whether or not you're going to have exclusively just a friendship with this person, or a relationship. All you have is a cup with syrups in it, this could be a Hot Chocolate, but it could also be a Mocha.
You pour in a generous amount of milk after that. This is the upmost essential piece! This is the trust, the love you share for each other as friends, and the respect you show each other as individuals.
When you get all that down, you can add the whipped cream. Realistically, this is your recognition of reality. When you get here, you realize this has potential, potential to be so much more than just a friendship! This journey has to be made by both individuals, communication needs to happen. If both of you recognize that you could be more than just friends, then you can move on. Now you can add chocolate drizzle on top, you can add kisses and caress.
Where does sex come in? I think it comes when you put the lid on, what else could it be? You can still enjoy a Hot Chocolate without a lid, but if it's missing other things, it's not really a Hot Chocolate, is it?
The point that I'm trying to make is: You can't put the lid on first, it would be completely stupid. I suppose you could, but then this wouldn't be a relationship, it would be a hook-up. Once the lid is on, there's no way to fill the cup. I realize all this sounds very weird, but I think it explains my feelings, generally, in a very detailed way.
I want this. I want to have a relationship that starts as a friendship, but we realize it could be more. I don't want to go out and "find a boyfriend," like so many people are trying to do. If I try to find a boyfriend, I'll end up forgetting to add something, because I'll try to move too quickly. It won't be perfect.
I don't believe perfection is something that exists in this world, there are always flaws. In reality though, if you have a good relationship, don't you love the entire person? Even their flaws?
You start out with a cup, being the meeting of two people, which is essentially your entire relationship. Obviously, if you don't have a cup, you can't make a drink; similarly, if you don't have someone, you haven't met them, they don't exist to you, there is no relationship.
After you meet this someone, you add some syrups. This is what kicks off the relationship, liking this person in general, just as an acquaintance. You can't possibly know, by now, whether or not you're going to have exclusively just a friendship with this person, or a relationship. All you have is a cup with syrups in it, this could be a Hot Chocolate, but it could also be a Mocha.
You pour in a generous amount of milk after that. This is the upmost essential piece! This is the trust, the love you share for each other as friends, and the respect you show each other as individuals.
When you get all that down, you can add the whipped cream. Realistically, this is your recognition of reality. When you get here, you realize this has potential, potential to be so much more than just a friendship! This journey has to be made by both individuals, communication needs to happen. If both of you recognize that you could be more than just friends, then you can move on. Now you can add chocolate drizzle on top, you can add kisses and caress.
Where does sex come in? I think it comes when you put the lid on, what else could it be? You can still enjoy a Hot Chocolate without a lid, but if it's missing other things, it's not really a Hot Chocolate, is it?
The point that I'm trying to make is: You can't put the lid on first, it would be completely stupid. I suppose you could, but then this wouldn't be a relationship, it would be a hook-up. Once the lid is on, there's no way to fill the cup. I realize all this sounds very weird, but I think it explains my feelings, generally, in a very detailed way.
I want this. I want to have a relationship that starts as a friendship, but we realize it could be more. I don't want to go out and "find a boyfriend," like so many people are trying to do. If I try to find a boyfriend, I'll end up forgetting to add something, because I'll try to move too quickly. It won't be perfect.
I don't believe perfection is something that exists in this world, there are always flaws. In reality though, if you have a good relationship, don't you love the entire person? Even their flaws?