Things heard at work (part 8)
It certainly was a busy day today at work... first thing this morning we had to move Forgetful because her and Motherof2 got into a physical fight. Motherof2 slapped Forgetful across the face so Forgetful pulled her hair. We moved Forgetful down to the first floor, which is probably better anyways because she needs the staff more - but she was crying. She had her door open because a co-worker was helping her move her things down and she looked so lost standing in the middle of the room so i went in to check on her and she grabbed me and started hugging & kissing me hard on the cheek. She was thanking me as the tears streamed down her face. Poor sweetie - she was so trapped and we never knew who to believe because they are both so ill. I think things will be better for her now though - she seems happy in her new room with her new roommate.
***
007 to me: ahhhh there you are my honey buns
Me: hi 007 how are ya this morning?
007: well i have a real problem with ______ _________
Me: oh?
007: yeah he keeps coming into my room at night and trying to turn me into a queer.
Me: What? I have never even seen you two anywhere near each other before! What is he doing to you?
007: Queer things - you know. Just ask my roommate pancake - the one in the middle bed (007 is one of the few who has 3 in his room). AND - pancake keeps stealing my pants. He has 15 pairs of my black dress pants. (i have never seen 007 wear anything but jeans or sweatpants in my life & he's lived at my work for 1 1/2 years)
Just then Pancake is at the door
Me: Pancake have you ever seen ________ ______ in your room?
Pancake: Who is that?
007: the queer who wears the yellow shirt
me: Ya know, he is a big guy, he lives across the hallway from you?
Pancake: nope - i've never seen him come into my room before.
Me: are you sure?
Pancake: yeah...
007: I AM GOING TO SUE YOU! YOU DIRTY ROTTEN LIAR! He is stealing all of my pants, i keep telling the boss but since i'm so wealthy she doesn't do anything about it. Well pancake you are screwed - i am gong to sue you for a million dollars, i'll get my pants back and move out of here. I'm giving my notice - i quit the night shift!
me: umm, okay
pancake just stands there looking at me blankly
007 storms off to have a smoke.
***
007 to me: ahhhh there you are my honey buns
Me: hi 007 how are ya this morning?
007: well i have a real problem with ______ _________
Me: oh?
007: yeah he keeps coming into my room at night and trying to turn me into a queer.
Me: What? I have never even seen you two anywhere near each other before! What is he doing to you?
007: Queer things - you know. Just ask my roommate pancake - the one in the middle bed (007 is one of the few who has 3 in his room). AND - pancake keeps stealing my pants. He has 15 pairs of my black dress pants. (i have never seen 007 wear anything but jeans or sweatpants in my life & he's lived at my work for 1 1/2 years)
Just then Pancake is at the door
Me: Pancake have you ever seen ________ ______ in your room?
Pancake: Who is that?
007: the queer who wears the yellow shirt
me: Ya know, he is a big guy, he lives across the hallway from you?
Pancake: nope - i've never seen him come into my room before.
Me: are you sure?
Pancake: yeah...
007: I AM GOING TO SUE YOU! YOU DIRTY ROTTEN LIAR! He is stealing all of my pants, i keep telling the boss but since i'm so wealthy she doesn't do anything about it. Well pancake you are screwed - i am gong to sue you for a million dollars, i'll get my pants back and move out of here. I'm giving my notice - i quit the night shift!
me: umm, okay
pancake just stands there looking at me blankly
007 storms off to have a smoke.