Why am I doing this instead of sleeping?
Because not every entry can be pseudo-important anal leakage. Some of them are just plain leakage!
We should all share more.
10 Firsts:
First Best Friend(s): Rebecca and Leah, from my playgroup when I was two
First Screen Name: bryony0827. I was totally awesome. Bryony was a character in one of the Redwall books, and 0827 is my birthday. Hoo fucking hah.
First Kiss: I don’t remember. Suffice it to say it was bad.
First Piercing: Earz, tercero grado.
First Crush: Probably some narc in pre-school. Some badass greaser with tough wheels.
First Music: RAFFI, MY MAN. You haven’t lived until you’ve heard his cover of “Octopus Garden.” I’m serious. Go now. Listen.
First Car: At this rate, never. My bike ownzors you all.
First love: Aw, shucks. Shucksie McShucks.
First stuffed animal: Er. Not the one I sleep with now…so let’s move on, shall we? (I LIVE SO MANY LIES.)
9 Lasts:
Last Cigarette: Nunca.
Last alchoholic: Shruggles.
Last Car Ride: A la doctora esta mañana.
Last Kiss: Friday. Dammit, I hate being sick.
Last Movie Seen: The Thin Man! Best movie ever.
Last Phone Call: Natrix
Last CD Played: My L’Shana Tovah mix. Actual album? Probably Eric Whitacre: The Complete a capella works 1991-2001
Last bubble bath: Oh, fuck you survey-maker. I’m “allergic” to those.
Last time you cried: your mom.
8 Have You Evers:
Have You Ever Dated One Of Your Best Friends: Far back in the mists of time. But in all seriousness, shouldn’t your s/o or whatever trendy term you use be one of your best friends?
Have You Ever Been Arrested: No.
Have You Ever Skinny Dipped: Yes. That’s all I’m saying.
Have You Ever Been on TV: In my amateur porn days. What laughs we all had when we fashioned a dildo out of baby food jars and rubber bands!
Have You Ever Kissed Someone and Then Regretted It: Perhaps.
Have You Ever had a Sex Dream About Someone You Knew: All the time.
Have you ever had sex: No.
Have you ever cheated: I cheat at board games a lot. Especially Monopoly. It brings out the criminal in me. And sometimes I try to sneak on extra men in Risk. One time I tried to cheat against Becca’s little sister in Chutes and Ladders. That was a low point in my life.
7 Things You're Wearing:
1. uhnduh paynts.
2. old blue t-shirt
3. black pants
4. chastity belt
5. glasses
6. slippers
7. Notice I didn’t say a bra! (scandalous)
6 Things You've Done Today:
1. irritated my doctor
2. read mucho.
3. did makeup work (oh baby)
4. took a nap
5. sang in zee car with my mom
6. had a magical adventure!
5 Favorite Things In NO Order:
1. Loofahs
2. white-out pens
3. toothbrushes (no one ever thinks about this one, but how much would you hate yourself if you didn’t have one?)
4. entertainment
5. huckleberry friends
4 People You Can Tell [almost] Anything to:
1. my mom.
2. Valentine Bear
3. Alexander Hamilton
4. my local confessional
3 Choices:
1. Black or White: black
2. Hot or Cold: cold
3. Chocolate or vanilla: chocolate
2 Things You Want to Do Before you die:
1. Eat a whale, like that chick in the Shel Silverstein poem.
2. Write a tell-all memoir sending everyone who ever knew me either behind bars or into hiding.
1 Thing You Regret:
1. You.
We should all share more.
10 Firsts:
First Best Friend(s): Rebecca and Leah, from my playgroup when I was two
First Screen Name: bryony0827. I was totally awesome. Bryony was a character in one of the Redwall books, and 0827 is my birthday. Hoo fucking hah.
First Kiss: I don’t remember. Suffice it to say it was bad.
First Piercing: Earz, tercero grado.
First Crush: Probably some narc in pre-school. Some badass greaser with tough wheels.
First Music: RAFFI, MY MAN. You haven’t lived until you’ve heard his cover of “Octopus Garden.” I’m serious. Go now. Listen.
First Car: At this rate, never. My bike ownzors you all.
First love: Aw, shucks. Shucksie McShucks.
First stuffed animal: Er. Not the one I sleep with now…so let’s move on, shall we? (I LIVE SO MANY LIES.)
9 Lasts:
Last Cigarette: Nunca.
Last alchoholic: Shruggles.
Last Car Ride: A la doctora esta mañana.
Last Kiss: Friday. Dammit, I hate being sick.
Last Movie Seen: The Thin Man! Best movie ever.
Last Phone Call: Natrix
Last CD Played: My L’Shana Tovah mix. Actual album? Probably Eric Whitacre: The Complete a capella works 1991-2001
Last bubble bath: Oh, fuck you survey-maker. I’m “allergic” to those.
Last time you cried: your mom.
8 Have You Evers:
Have You Ever Dated One Of Your Best Friends: Far back in the mists of time. But in all seriousness, shouldn’t your s/o or whatever trendy term you use be one of your best friends?
Have You Ever Been Arrested: No.
Have You Ever Skinny Dipped: Yes. That’s all I’m saying.
Have You Ever Been on TV: In my amateur porn days. What laughs we all had when we fashioned a dildo out of baby food jars and rubber bands!
Have You Ever Kissed Someone and Then Regretted It: Perhaps.
Have You Ever had a Sex Dream About Someone You Knew: All the time.
Have you ever had sex: No.
Have you ever cheated: I cheat at board games a lot. Especially Monopoly. It brings out the criminal in me. And sometimes I try to sneak on extra men in Risk. One time I tried to cheat against Becca’s little sister in Chutes and Ladders. That was a low point in my life.
7 Things You're Wearing:
1. uhnduh paynts.
2. old blue t-shirt
3. black pants
4. chastity belt
5. glasses
6. slippers
7. Notice I didn’t say a bra! (scandalous)
6 Things You've Done Today:
1. irritated my doctor
2. read mucho.
3. did makeup work (oh baby)
4. took a nap
5. sang in zee car with my mom
6. had a magical adventure!
5 Favorite Things In NO Order:
1. Loofahs
2. white-out pens
3. toothbrushes (no one ever thinks about this one, but how much would you hate yourself if you didn’t have one?)
4. entertainment
5. huckleberry friends
4 People You Can Tell [almost] Anything to:
1. my mom.
2. Valentine Bear
3. Alexander Hamilton
4. my local confessional
3 Choices:
1. Black or White: black
2. Hot or Cold: cold
3. Chocolate or vanilla: chocolate
2 Things You Want to Do Before you die:
1. Eat a whale, like that chick in the Shel Silverstein poem.
2. Write a tell-all memoir sending everyone who ever knew me either behind bars or into hiding.
1 Thing You Regret:
1. You.