First Report

[bogusmagicker]

Ah . . .

This is . . . an unfamiliar environment.

. . .
. . .
. . . ?

. . . The data composing this room is . . . inaccessible.  Highly irregular.  Logic attributes my current situation to the activities of Haruhi Suzumiya in some way.  Probability indicates that she will become accessible should I make my presence known.

Communicating to all within

Comments

[normal_anomaly]

!!

Na...Nagato?! Nagato, you're here?!

[bogusmagicker]

Kyon . . .

Yes, I am. Please explain where 'here' is.

[normal_anomaly]

Well, it's...a place called Mayfield. I dunno if you've ever heard of a movie called The Stepford Wives, but if you have, it's like that.

1/2

[bogusmagicker]

Accessing database; search -- "The Stepford . . .

. . .
. . .
. . . Database inaccessible.

[bogusmagicker]

I have not. What is the premise of this movie?

[normal_anomaly]

It's...ah, damn, how do I explain this...it's about an American suburb where everything is perfect. The houses, the lawns, the people...everything's perfect. To a really, really creepy degree. That's exactly what this place is like.

[bogusmagicker]

. . . I see.

[filter]
Have you determined if our current situation may be a result of Haruhi Suzumiya's unconscious actions?

[[Filtered]]

[normal_anomaly]

That's what I thought at first. But the more I learn about this place, the less likely it seems to be her. Unless Suzumiya has a secret sadomasochistic streak I don't know about.

Re: [[Filtered]]

[bogusmagicker]

Understood.

Then Haruhi Suzumiya was not the one who willed this world into existence, though the one responsible possess abilities on a similar scale. I have been told that the environment regularly alters its own data to suit its needs. Accordingly, I have made several attempts to access this data myself; I was unsuccessful. I have been unable to perform any other feats you normally term 'bogus magic'.

It seems, at present, I have become a normal human being.

Re: [[Filtered]]

[normal_anomaly]

Straight to business. At least some things don't change.

Yeah. I've heard other people complaining about stuff like that. The girl I'm stuck with as a "sister" claims she can use magic. Just not in this place.

[[Filtered]] 1/2

[bogusmagicker]

. . . It is possible Suzumiya's powers may be nullified as well. Keep a close watch; do not allow her to come to harm. The potential for autoevolution must not be lost.

I shall continue to observe.

Re: [[Filtered]]

[bogusmagicker]

. . . It is good that I am not here alone.

Re: [[Filtered]]

[normal_anomaly]

Yeah, it's better to deal with stuff like this when you're not alone.

Still, given the choice between being home and being here, I'd take the former in a heartbeat. And I don't exactly wish this on anyone else, either.

Re: [[Filtered]]

[bogusmagicker]

Agreed.