Don't Any One Go and Die from Shock Now...
...But here's the thank-you story to smokeline. She is the coolest because she edited a big essay for me, and was generally an awesome person. Most of you should like this, though. ^^
Title: Apparently, Very
Pairing: Sirius/Remus
Rating: PG-ish for naked boys in bed together, a mention of excessive drinking, etc
Summary: "Remus Lupin had heard the horrific stories of waking up nude, confused, and hung over in a foreign bed with someone in a similar state."
For: The ever-so-lovely kinky and wonderful Michelle (smokeline)
Beta: shadowsaine ♥♥
Remus Lupin had heard the horrific stories of waking up nude, confused, and hung over in a foreign bed with someone in a similar state. Only, Remus had never guessed he would also have to go through such a thing. He had always believed he'd have the brains to not get drunk and go home with someone. How stupid could you get? 'Apparently, very,' he thought resentfully. He attempted to sit up, but his head protested angrily, and his body felt sore...like that. A blush quickly flew to his face. He slowly laid back down, and slipped beneath the covers. A groan escaped Remus' lips. This morning sounded to him like something he'd like to just skip -- "Ill, you know," he'd say a couple of days later, and everyone would nod sympathetically. Problem dealt with. However, to escape this he'd have to get off the bed, and that might wake up whoever was lying beside him. That would completely defeat the purpose.
But who was lying beside him? He turned his head to look, but tightly shut his eyes half way. He didn't see anything but black hair. He'd rather not look. Yes. He absently wondered why he was acting so immature this morning, but quickly blamed it on his hang-over. Those definitely could play with your thinking and actions. Yes… yes, that was it.
Remus started. Random Bed Partner had rolled over and was stretching. His mind went into fight or flight, but he couldn't really choose. His limbs felt sort of numb. He peeked his eyes open, and there leaning on his elbow was a smiling Sirius Black.
"Good morning, Moony," he said, trademark cocky grin in place.
"Mph," Remus replied.
"You sound dignified."
"You sound awake. And too cocky for hang-over mornings." A smirk spread on Sirius' face as Remus said this. Remus immediately blushed.
"I am Sirius Black. I am always cocky."
"Right," he muttered.
There was a long silence, well really there was a little bit of a silence as Sirius can't stand them for too long, but in comparison it was quite a long silence. Anyway, as anyone could have expected, Sirius did eventually break it.
"You're in my bed," Sirius said.
"I ... am?"
"Indeed," Sirius answered.
"Intriguing."
"Why?"
"Don't you know?" Remus asked. I mean, looking around, how could one not know?
Sirius raised an eyebrow. "Oh, really?" The blush on Remus' face darkened. He slightly wondered if it was getting to the unhealthy stage and his brain may spontaneously blow up in his skull. He shook his head.
"I...guess."
"Are you naked?"
If his blush hadn't been at Unhealthy yet, it was now. "I, uh, aren't you?"
Sirius' smirk increased. "Why don't you look for me?"
Remus shook his head. "I don't think so, Padfoot."
Sirius pouted. "Why does it matter since we shagged last night?"
Remus eyes widened. "We really...?"
"You're the first one that pointed it out," Sirius noted.
"Yes, well-"
"And you're naked."
"Yes, well-"
"I think that's hot."
Remus put his hands over his face. This was so embarrassing. "Sirius," Remus started, "why do you have to say things like that? This is not hot. This is incredibly embarrassing, and I'm afraid that-"
"Stop being afraid, and just go with it. You didn't mind last night."
"Will you stop interrupting me?" Remus said much louder than necessary. He licked his lips, and continued on, now much more quietly than necessary. "Look, Sirius, this is a thing that we should just forget about. This," Remus gestured between him and Sirius, "never happened. This," he gestured again, "would kill us if anyone knew. How about you go fetch my clothes for me, put on your own, and then we'll leave having forgotten that anything like this ever occurred."
Sirius looked at him for a moment. "You don't want me?" He sounded as deflated as a rejected pup.
"Sirius...," Remus began.
"What's wrong with it? I mean, if we can keep it quiet.... Wouldn't that be worth it so we could keep this?"
"There is no 'this'. There is no 'it'. There is no 'we', unless that goes towards the Marauders. There is always Marauders."
"Don't you think that the Marauders will start being paired off one day? I mean, the others are getting closer to their girls. What would be so bad about some love between us?"
Remus gave Sirius a stern look, quite akin to McGonnagal's, that said 'not in this millennia, buster'. Never mind that the end of the millennium was only 30-some years away.
Sirius nodded at him, "So you really don't fancy me?"
"I, uh, I haven't thought on that bit," Remus felt his cheeks getting red again.
"It's not a hard question," Sirius replied, "Do you fancy me?" He over-emphasized each word.
Remus felt cornered, and said a tad defensively, "Well, I'm not sure what I think of you exactly! However, if I did fancy you, it wouldn't matter. Even if I tried to be with you, it would end quickly. All of your so-called relationships do."
Comprehension dawned on Sirius. "So what if I promised you forever?"
"First off," Remus licked his lips again nervously, "you can't promise me forever. We're fifteen, and-"
"I'm sixteen," Sirius said with a smirk, "you are fifteen."
Remus rolled his eyes. "The point is we're too young. Secondly, one of us," 'You' his mind said, "will find someone else that we want and love more. It's a rigged game, and I'm not interested."
"Then pretend to be."
Remus' look made Sirius' attempted grin fade. "It wouldn't work, Sirius."
"You're sure?"
"Positive."
"Well, in that case," Sirius said as he stood up, "I'll be fetching clothes and forgetting."
Sirius' words made Remus feel like his heart had just sunk down a few inches, but he held his ground. Remus couldn't help the feeling of regret that fogged over his mind for the next couple of days.
The unfortunate thing, or fortunate thing (depending), of not being sure of things is that at some point you will know and stop being unsure. For Remus this was certainly an unfortunate thing. Over the course of the last three days, he had remembered a good portion of that night with Sirius, and was seeing Sirius in that light that could make you utterly mad over someone, if he hadn't been doing that before their night together. It was very apparent to Remus after these three days that he wanted Sirius, at least for a little while. He felt idiotic over refusing his offer the other night, but he was afraid he couldn't go and take it back. It wouldn't be fair, because Sirius had made sure that Remus was sure in his decision to not be with him. Also, if Remus craned his neck to the right he had a very good view of Sirius snogging with some Ravenclaw girl. It was disgusting. It being the snogging and the fact that after asking Remus if he wanted forever just three days ago that he was already snogging someone else. That someone else being a girl. Which was nasty, unfair, and as previously stated, disgusting. Remus did the only thing he could think of to do; he left to go and study. Good grades always helped. Mhm.
A few hours later someone stumbled over the entrance to Gryffindor common room. Remus looked up silently hoping it was Sirius. It was Peter.
"Hullo, Wormtail," Remus said automatically.
"Hey, what work are you doing?"
"Have you seen Padfoot?"
"Sorry, not in a while. Last time I saw him he was with some chick," Peter answered.
"Thanks, Peter."
"Hey, can I have your Charms essay?" Peter asked.
"Have you looked in these books? I just used them for mine..." Remus pointed to a small pile of books. Peter gave him an 'Oh, God, please no,' look in return. "Oh, fine. Here," Remus handed Peter his paper.
"You're a god," Peter said with relief.
"I know. Don't exactly co-"
At that moment there was a crash from the entrance that cut off Remus. This time is was Sirius. An extremely upset looking Sirius. Uh oh.
Peter, bless his soul, ran over to Sirius.
"What happened, Padfoot, what happened?" Sirius pushed Peter out of the way, and stormed upstairs. Peter tried to follow, but got hit in the face with the door. After that, Peter just turned around, and left with Remus' essay. Remus sighed. He hoped that Peter wouldn't copy down his essay word for word, and that Sirius was alright. He studied for fifteen more minutes before he dared to go up to the land of Angry and, quite possibly, Hurt Sirius.
Remus politely knocked on the door. There wasn't an answer. He walked in anyway.
"Sirius?"
"Fuck off," came the muttered reply. Remus followed the sound.
"Sirius, what is it? Has my nose finally given you a mental breakdown?" Remus said trying terribly to bring some humor to whatever this situation happened to be.
"Shut up about your nose," Sirius said a bit louder. Well, fine, Remus thought. He walked towards the sound.
"What is it, Padfoot?"
"Leave me the hell alone."
"You know I can't do that."
"You chose to do that, mate!" Sirius yelled. Remus sees him half under James' bed. Given the choice, Remus would never go under there. The thought frightened him immensely. Who knew what diseases from Under Potter's Bed were lurking and might attack?
"What are you talking about?"
"You don't want me."
"What on earth are you talking about, Sirius?"
"Now I know that you really care about me," scoffed Sirius. "You don't even remember!"
"Remember what?"
"I wanted you."
Remus hesitated for a moment. "Wanted?"
"There was a whole big discussion over it, and-"
"No, I know that, but 'wanted'. As in, past tense?"
"What difference does that make, Moony?" asked Sirius. "Besides, you said multiple times that your love life would be fine without me ever re-entering."
"Well, I-"
Sirius threw his hands up. "No, no! You don't need to say anything, Remus. I understand. You've already hurt me, so you can't avoid that bit."
"I'm not saying sorry-"
"Good, because I wouldn't accept."
"Would you stop bloody cutting me off?" Remus said fiercely. "If you listened to what I have to say, you'd hear that I changed my mind a bit ago, and I want you!" Remus breathed heavily, and then realized what he had just blurted out. He prepared himself for some sort of rejection, and waited.
Sirius stared at him. He knew and understood what Remus had just said, but he'd been acting so differently than that.... Then again, Remus seemed to never really know how to act. Sirius felt a grin come to his face, and he got out from under Prongs's bed. What had ever made him go under there anyway? He shook his head. Sirius was rarely in-tune to that part of his brain, anyway.
"Padfoot?" Remus prompted.
In response, Sirius pulled Remus close, and kissed him the best he could -- which, of course, was very good and beyond the powers of most blokes his age and older, you understand. They parted to breathe, and Remus gave a small, shy grin. This time he didn't notice the faint flush on his face.
"You're gonna have a hell of a lot to deal with, you know," Sirius told him.
"As if I'd have it any other way," Remus replied.
"Well, it might be pretty fair in the end."
"Yeah," Remus said, looking down. Sirius was brave to be friends with him as it were, but a...a boyfriend?
"I mean, your nose considered-" Sirius was cut off by a playful hit to the shoulder.
"You can't say such things when he can hear you."
"I don't give a damn about what your nose thinks. And what the fuck, Moony? He?"
"Shush, you're hurting his feelings more."
"I wonder about you sometimes," Sirius said.
Remus snorted. "I wonder about you all the time."
"That's a lovely thing to say to me."
"I know," Remus smirked.
"Fucker."
"I thought you held that role," Remus questioned mockingly.
"Ha ha."
"I know. I'm so hilarious. Hahahaha."
"Maybe I should reconsider...big nose, bad since of humor...."
"As long as my nose stays straight you shouldn't reconsider."
"Moony," Sirius laughed, "absolutely nothing about you is straight."
"At least it's not hooked."
"Fair point," Sirius said, and pulled Remus in to snog more.
---
Memes are fun.
You Are Animal
A complete lunatic, you're operating on 100% animal instincts.
You thrive on uncontrolled energy, and you're downright scary.
But you sure can beat a good drum.
"Kill! Kill!"
The Muppet Personality Test
Title: Apparently, Very
Pairing: Sirius/Remus
Rating: PG-ish for naked boys in bed together, a mention of excessive drinking, etc
Summary: "Remus Lupin had heard the horrific stories of waking up nude, confused, and hung over in a foreign bed with someone in a similar state."
For: The ever-so-lovely kinky and wonderful Michelle (smokeline)
Beta: shadowsaine ♥♥
Remus Lupin had heard the horrific stories of waking up nude, confused, and hung over in a foreign bed with someone in a similar state. Only, Remus had never guessed he would also have to go through such a thing. He had always believed he'd have the brains to not get drunk and go home with someone. How stupid could you get? 'Apparently, very,' he thought resentfully. He attempted to sit up, but his head protested angrily, and his body felt sore...like that. A blush quickly flew to his face. He slowly laid back down, and slipped beneath the covers. A groan escaped Remus' lips. This morning sounded to him like something he'd like to just skip -- "Ill, you know," he'd say a couple of days later, and everyone would nod sympathetically. Problem dealt with. However, to escape this he'd have to get off the bed, and that might wake up whoever was lying beside him. That would completely defeat the purpose.
But who was lying beside him? He turned his head to look, but tightly shut his eyes half way. He didn't see anything but black hair. He'd rather not look. Yes. He absently wondered why he was acting so immature this morning, but quickly blamed it on his hang-over. Those definitely could play with your thinking and actions. Yes… yes, that was it.
Remus started. Random Bed Partner had rolled over and was stretching. His mind went into fight or flight, but he couldn't really choose. His limbs felt sort of numb. He peeked his eyes open, and there leaning on his elbow was a smiling Sirius Black.
"Good morning, Moony," he said, trademark cocky grin in place.
"Mph," Remus replied.
"You sound dignified."
"You sound awake. And too cocky for hang-over mornings." A smirk spread on Sirius' face as Remus said this. Remus immediately blushed.
"I am Sirius Black. I am always cocky."
"Right," he muttered.
There was a long silence, well really there was a little bit of a silence as Sirius can't stand them for too long, but in comparison it was quite a long silence. Anyway, as anyone could have expected, Sirius did eventually break it.
"You're in my bed," Sirius said.
"I ... am?"
"Indeed," Sirius answered.
"Intriguing."
"Why?"
"Don't you know?" Remus asked. I mean, looking around, how could one not know?
Sirius raised an eyebrow. "Oh, really?" The blush on Remus' face darkened. He slightly wondered if it was getting to the unhealthy stage and his brain may spontaneously blow up in his skull. He shook his head.
"I...guess."
"Are you naked?"
If his blush hadn't been at Unhealthy yet, it was now. "I, uh, aren't you?"
Sirius' smirk increased. "Why don't you look for me?"
Remus shook his head. "I don't think so, Padfoot."
Sirius pouted. "Why does it matter since we shagged last night?"
Remus eyes widened. "We really...?"
"You're the first one that pointed it out," Sirius noted.
"Yes, well-"
"And you're naked."
"Yes, well-"
"I think that's hot."
Remus put his hands over his face. This was so embarrassing. "Sirius," Remus started, "why do you have to say things like that? This is not hot. This is incredibly embarrassing, and I'm afraid that-"
"Stop being afraid, and just go with it. You didn't mind last night."
"Will you stop interrupting me?" Remus said much louder than necessary. He licked his lips, and continued on, now much more quietly than necessary. "Look, Sirius, this is a thing that we should just forget about. This," Remus gestured between him and Sirius, "never happened. This," he gestured again, "would kill us if anyone knew. How about you go fetch my clothes for me, put on your own, and then we'll leave having forgotten that anything like this ever occurred."
Sirius looked at him for a moment. "You don't want me?" He sounded as deflated as a rejected pup.
"Sirius...," Remus began.
"What's wrong with it? I mean, if we can keep it quiet.... Wouldn't that be worth it so we could keep this?"
"There is no 'this'. There is no 'it'. There is no 'we', unless that goes towards the Marauders. There is always Marauders."
"Don't you think that the Marauders will start being paired off one day? I mean, the others are getting closer to their girls. What would be so bad about some love between us?"
Remus gave Sirius a stern look, quite akin to McGonnagal's, that said 'not in this millennia, buster'. Never mind that the end of the millennium was only 30-some years away.
Sirius nodded at him, "So you really don't fancy me?"
"I, uh, I haven't thought on that bit," Remus felt his cheeks getting red again.
"It's not a hard question," Sirius replied, "Do you fancy me?" He over-emphasized each word.
Remus felt cornered, and said a tad defensively, "Well, I'm not sure what I think of you exactly! However, if I did fancy you, it wouldn't matter. Even if I tried to be with you, it would end quickly. All of your so-called relationships do."
Comprehension dawned on Sirius. "So what if I promised you forever?"
"First off," Remus licked his lips again nervously, "you can't promise me forever. We're fifteen, and-"
"I'm sixteen," Sirius said with a smirk, "you are fifteen."
Remus rolled his eyes. "The point is we're too young. Secondly, one of us," 'You' his mind said, "will find someone else that we want and love more. It's a rigged game, and I'm not interested."
"Then pretend to be."
Remus' look made Sirius' attempted grin fade. "It wouldn't work, Sirius."
"You're sure?"
"Positive."
"Well, in that case," Sirius said as he stood up, "I'll be fetching clothes and forgetting."
Sirius' words made Remus feel like his heart had just sunk down a few inches, but he held his ground. Remus couldn't help the feeling of regret that fogged over his mind for the next couple of days.
The unfortunate thing, or fortunate thing (depending), of not being sure of things is that at some point you will know and stop being unsure. For Remus this was certainly an unfortunate thing. Over the course of the last three days, he had remembered a good portion of that night with Sirius, and was seeing Sirius in that light that could make you utterly mad over someone, if he hadn't been doing that before their night together. It was very apparent to Remus after these three days that he wanted Sirius, at least for a little while. He felt idiotic over refusing his offer the other night, but he was afraid he couldn't go and take it back. It wouldn't be fair, because Sirius had made sure that Remus was sure in his decision to not be with him. Also, if Remus craned his neck to the right he had a very good view of Sirius snogging with some Ravenclaw girl. It was disgusting. It being the snogging and the fact that after asking Remus if he wanted forever just three days ago that he was already snogging someone else. That someone else being a girl. Which was nasty, unfair, and as previously stated, disgusting. Remus did the only thing he could think of to do; he left to go and study. Good grades always helped. Mhm.
A few hours later someone stumbled over the entrance to Gryffindor common room. Remus looked up silently hoping it was Sirius. It was Peter.
"Hullo, Wormtail," Remus said automatically.
"Hey, what work are you doing?"
"Have you seen Padfoot?"
"Sorry, not in a while. Last time I saw him he was with some chick," Peter answered.
"Thanks, Peter."
"Hey, can I have your Charms essay?" Peter asked.
"Have you looked in these books? I just used them for mine..." Remus pointed to a small pile of books. Peter gave him an 'Oh, God, please no,' look in return. "Oh, fine. Here," Remus handed Peter his paper.
"You're a god," Peter said with relief.
"I know. Don't exactly co-"
At that moment there was a crash from the entrance that cut off Remus. This time is was Sirius. An extremely upset looking Sirius. Uh oh.
Peter, bless his soul, ran over to Sirius.
"What happened, Padfoot, what happened?" Sirius pushed Peter out of the way, and stormed upstairs. Peter tried to follow, but got hit in the face with the door. After that, Peter just turned around, and left with Remus' essay. Remus sighed. He hoped that Peter wouldn't copy down his essay word for word, and that Sirius was alright. He studied for fifteen more minutes before he dared to go up to the land of Angry and, quite possibly, Hurt Sirius.
Remus politely knocked on the door. There wasn't an answer. He walked in anyway.
"Sirius?"
"Fuck off," came the muttered reply. Remus followed the sound.
"Sirius, what is it? Has my nose finally given you a mental breakdown?" Remus said trying terribly to bring some humor to whatever this situation happened to be.
"Shut up about your nose," Sirius said a bit louder. Well, fine, Remus thought. He walked towards the sound.
"What is it, Padfoot?"
"Leave me the hell alone."
"You know I can't do that."
"You chose to do that, mate!" Sirius yelled. Remus sees him half under James' bed. Given the choice, Remus would never go under there. The thought frightened him immensely. Who knew what diseases from Under Potter's Bed were lurking and might attack?
"What are you talking about?"
"You don't want me."
"What on earth are you talking about, Sirius?"
"Now I know that you really care about me," scoffed Sirius. "You don't even remember!"
"Remember what?"
"I wanted you."
Remus hesitated for a moment. "Wanted?"
"There was a whole big discussion over it, and-"
"No, I know that, but 'wanted'. As in, past tense?"
"What difference does that make, Moony?" asked Sirius. "Besides, you said multiple times that your love life would be fine without me ever re-entering."
"Well, I-"
Sirius threw his hands up. "No, no! You don't need to say anything, Remus. I understand. You've already hurt me, so you can't avoid that bit."
"I'm not saying sorry-"
"Good, because I wouldn't accept."
"Would you stop bloody cutting me off?" Remus said fiercely. "If you listened to what I have to say, you'd hear that I changed my mind a bit ago, and I want you!" Remus breathed heavily, and then realized what he had just blurted out. He prepared himself for some sort of rejection, and waited.
Sirius stared at him. He knew and understood what Remus had just said, but he'd been acting so differently than that.... Then again, Remus seemed to never really know how to act. Sirius felt a grin come to his face, and he got out from under Prongs's bed. What had ever made him go under there anyway? He shook his head. Sirius was rarely in-tune to that part of his brain, anyway.
"Padfoot?" Remus prompted.
In response, Sirius pulled Remus close, and kissed him the best he could -- which, of course, was very good and beyond the powers of most blokes his age and older, you understand. They parted to breathe, and Remus gave a small, shy grin. This time he didn't notice the faint flush on his face.
"You're gonna have a hell of a lot to deal with, you know," Sirius told him.
"As if I'd have it any other way," Remus replied.
"Well, it might be pretty fair in the end."
"Yeah," Remus said, looking down. Sirius was brave to be friends with him as it were, but a...a boyfriend?
"I mean, your nose considered-" Sirius was cut off by a playful hit to the shoulder.
"You can't say such things when he can hear you."
"I don't give a damn about what your nose thinks. And what the fuck, Moony? He?"
"Shush, you're hurting his feelings more."
"I wonder about you sometimes," Sirius said.
Remus snorted. "I wonder about you all the time."
"That's a lovely thing to say to me."
"I know," Remus smirked.
"Fucker."
"I thought you held that role," Remus questioned mockingly.
"Ha ha."
"I know. I'm so hilarious. Hahahaha."
"Maybe I should reconsider...big nose, bad since of humor...."
"As long as my nose stays straight you shouldn't reconsider."
"Moony," Sirius laughed, "absolutely nothing about you is straight."
"At least it's not hooked."
"Fair point," Sirius said, and pulled Remus in to snog more.
---
Memes are fun.
You Are Animal
A complete lunatic, you're operating on 100% animal instincts.
You thrive on uncontrolled energy, and you're downright scary.
But you sure can beat a good drum.
"Kill! Kill!"
The Muppet Personality Test