Friend, It's Been Far To Long...
i somewhat feel betrayed ever since what happened with all this journal bullshit. it changed me to hold things inside more and not write about them. i never sign onto this journal anymore. i hate that things have changed. its making me feel like shit. i have all this shit to say and i cant say it.
so anyway, a lot has changed. and i think this is a good example. i was asked to write an essay by my physics teacher. i had to discuss in two pages, what i want to be when i grow up, what motivates me to that goal, how important motivation is in reaching that goal and lastly, what motivates me.
as you can see be reading the essay i have just written (which really sucks because it isnt for an english class so i put NO effort into it at all), i totally ended up with some random explination on happiness. its very obvious to me that by writting this, its clear that these are the sort of things im focusing on now. i havent been able to clear my head for a long time because i havent been writting. so when i just started writting, this essay is what came out. its almost just like a journal entry.
gosh, now that ive started writting, i realize how much shit i have to say. well anyway...i just threw in a bunch of random thoughts to try to explain all this...i dont think it made any sense. oh well, heres the essay:
As far as I know now, all I want to be when I grow up is happy and peaceful. Ever since I can remember, people have been asking me what I want to be when I grow up. Sometimes it was just a conversation starter and other times people just asked me as a quick and easy way to find what my areas of interest were. When I was very young, I wanted to be lots of different things at different times. Once I wanted to be an artist just because it seemed easy. Then I wanted to be an astronaut and a chef and then a singer. But all of these professions had nothing to do with any of my talents or interest. Then as I grew up, I made up my mind and decided that I would love to be a lawyer. I made this decision based on my natural talent of arguing and my mothers encouragement. I think I had the dream of becoming a lawyer for about five or six years. After some time, I realized that my dream of becoming a lawyer was out of reach. It required too much schooling for which I didn't even have the grades. As much as I knew I would be a fantastic and successful lawyer, it didn't cause me to try harder in school so the dream was lost. Who knows, maybe it will happen when I am older.
When I look into my future and try to form some sort of picture of myself, I can
so anyway, a lot has changed. and i think this is a good example. i was asked to write an essay by my physics teacher. i had to discuss in two pages, what i want to be when i grow up, what motivates me to that goal, how important motivation is in reaching that goal and lastly, what motivates me.
as you can see be reading the essay i have just written (which really sucks because it isnt for an english class so i put NO effort into it at all), i totally ended up with some random explination on happiness. its very obvious to me that by writting this, its clear that these are the sort of things im focusing on now. i havent been able to clear my head for a long time because i havent been writting. so when i just started writting, this essay is what came out. its almost just like a journal entry.
gosh, now that ive started writting, i realize how much shit i have to say. well anyway...i just threw in a bunch of random thoughts to try to explain all this...i dont think it made any sense. oh well, heres the essay:
As far as I know now, all I want to be when I grow up is happy and peaceful. Ever since I can remember, people have been asking me what I want to be when I grow up. Sometimes it was just a conversation starter and other times people just asked me as a quick and easy way to find what my areas of interest were. When I was very young, I wanted to be lots of different things at different times. Once I wanted to be an artist just because it seemed easy. Then I wanted to be an astronaut and a chef and then a singer. But all of these professions had nothing to do with any of my talents or interest. Then as I grew up, I made up my mind and decided that I would love to be a lawyer. I made this decision based on my natural talent of arguing and my mothers encouragement. I think I had the dream of becoming a lawyer for about five or six years. After some time, I realized that my dream of becoming a lawyer was out of reach. It required too much schooling for which I didn't even have the grades. As much as I knew I would be a fantastic and successful lawyer, it didn't cause me to try harder in school so the dream was lost. Who knows, maybe it will happen when I am older.
When I look into my future and try to form some sort of picture of myself, I can