Work, Wiired, Phone, Work, Wiired, Phone....
My title pretty much explains it all. Thats all Ive done the past 2 or 3 days. Work is always being gay because of the little kids at camp. I get off work, go online but no ones ever on. So then I go to Wiired and own. Then I come home and talk on the phone till at least 3am. Last nite we had a scrim at Wiired omg it was hilarious. At first we had this nub on our team. We had B Site on Dust 2 allll to ourselves and he didnt plant but went front yard and started shooting CT's. Everyone was yelling at him, tellin him to plant the bomb, but we wouldnt. So when he came back to B Site thru the double door I one shot head shotted him with my DEagle and he died lololol. Then I planted the bomb. Shit that was a good ass scrim. At first we were losing but after like the 7th round we started owning. Im just glad I was on Sammy's team. I coulda made the WTF Clan since I did good but me and Sam decided that we should just be anti WTF and keep with aD. And aD is where its at my friends! For those of you who dont know, thats our clan name. Everythings basically the same at the rink. Nothing good ever happens there. Phils are just horrible. Me and my Dad dont even watch them anymore. Thats how bad we think the Phillies are. Tonight we went to Wiired too. I had madd fun. It was me Joe Randy Max Fink TJ Shep Dag Sam and Chris. My rank on the server is getting pretty high and Im gettin better. I like going there cuz now alotta them asian thugs are nice to me. I guess if youre good at CS, youre in with the group. Whenever I walk by they say, Yo! Bodank! Whats up man! Other times they just randomly say whats up lol. And always getting complemented by em too. The only person who gets treated better there besides like the admins and shit is Sam. Theyre always like, hey man! Are you SSA!? Thats Sam's name when he plays the game. Aww man the drive home tonight was great. Chris made me laugh at passing street signs, I doorbell ditched his house right before we left, Dag gave the thumbs up to some random old lady, and you know me and Joe are always laughing so.. But, lately Ive always been in a bad mood. Where do I start? I barely see Johnna, summer is almost over, Work is a pain, Im always tired because I dont get sleep, and Im physically in pain from shit I do. But I think whats making me sad the most is that Lady is sick. Im trying to be optimistic about her being okay but things arent looking good at all. I pray and ask God everynight if he would take 2 or 3 years of my life and give it to my dog. I dont know whats wrong with her but my Mom is taking her to the vet on Thursday. She wants me to go but I dont think I will be able to handle it if they said she isnt gonna make it. Im sorry I dont care if I seem like a little bitch but I love my dog more than anything in this world. I dont wanna even BEGIN to imagine life without my baby. If something happened, I dont wanna begin to imagine how Id react either. I know for one I wouldnt talk to my mom for awhile and Im serious. She has sitten on her ass from day one when Lady started acting a little weird and done nothing. Because of her bitchiness, my beautiful dog has to suffer. I know I wouldnt have the strength to laugh or smile for a long time. Lady doesnt even eat human food anymore. What can I do to help her? I dont know. I cant even explain how I feel right now. But more than anything right now, I want Lady to hang in there for me. Im sorry I havent mentioned this to anyone. I dont want to break down emotinally in front of you guys. Everytime I even think about it for a split second, my eyes water. I love her so much. I cant even look at her anymore. Even now, shes still the most beautiful dog in the world but, she just looks sick in her body and especially her eyes. I just wanna remember her when she was perfect. Not when she was in suffering. If we really have to put her sleep. I wanna hold her paw the last seconds of her life and tell her I love her more than anything, tell her how beautiful she was, what a great dog she was, what a great friend she was, that I will think about her everyday for the rest of my life and give her kisses in my favorite spot (the side of her snout) and pet her right under her ear where she likes it the most. I'll do everything possible in that short but yet so long moment. And after its all over when she is lying there lifeless, I wonder.. I wonder when will I look away and leave. I wonder what force will bring me off of her. What strength can take away my grasp on her. I wonder what will make me leave the room. And after there will be no words to comfort my grief. For awhile, maybe a long time, I'd live in shadow and in doubt. Im serious when I say I want to die before all my family and friends. I cant handle this. If you see this, even if you dont know my dog, please, please pray for her. If you still want to see the good old Shane Devlin. If you want to see him happy and goofy like he always is, just take a minute out of your life and ask God to give Lady strength. Unless you really feel it necessary, Id rather not talk about this too much. I mean if you wanna ask how Im doing or how shes doing fine. But, besides that, I dont wanna really talk about it. Im man enough to admit that Ive already shed too many tears over this. Lady Sophia, I will always Love you, always. Please, please Lady fight whatever sickness you have away.