Well this was a happy post.
It's lonely enough to drink alone in this town (as if there was company)
Laura calls me now and again, but she always sounds pathetic, she hates herself and her life and what she did to me, but she calls because she doesn't have much left out there, she pushed away the people who care, except me, whom she just calls now and again, and always sounds pathetic.
I use to have a friend to confide in, we hung out and it was just us, now she had a messy relationship that regardless of officialities, is not over, now she just talks about him, where did my friend run off to? I want to be an ear if she needs it, but all this talk will not help her move on. she's stuck on that little piece of him that was worth all the shit. And I know just what that's like.
Whenever 2 or 3 of the Ormand kids dissappear (ie go home) I get an overwhelming feeling of how lonely this town feels, even when there is a few of us left, we get bored and run off to different places. Or say we will call and don't. Maybe it because I don't have a home to go home to, this town is all I've got. It's miserable.
Half my friends from school, when I see them it's something quaint and nonchalant. Like when I went by Matt Hodges house (who lives down the street from me but we haven't seen much of each other all summer) It was trite, it wouldn't even have made a difference if I went by or not. Is that was life is like? we all go to each other's houses and make small talk about shit we aren't even interested in, just to feel less alone?
I saw her again, at a party, and she waved at me and smiled, end of my fucking life, it would be easier not to appreciate her and care about her or want to hang out with her if she was the same caliber of bitch all the time.
My family is obsessed with guns, and my superhero influenced philosophy of life is starting to see maybe they aren't entirely paranoid. You need a sword to protect the innocent, you need a weapon to stand up for justice.
Nobody calls me much, have I become that kid? who hangs out with multiple groups of people, and am even welcomed. But only to be accepted into plans, not invited. To be enjoyed when in company, but not thought about when not. I'm feeling really fucking miserable here.
I don't know if I'll be able to save enough for New England, along with books and rent, but I'm trying, I have to get some mileage in me or I'll die.
I am dying.
Laura calls me now and again, but she always sounds pathetic, she hates herself and her life and what she did to me, but she calls because she doesn't have much left out there, she pushed away the people who care, except me, whom she just calls now and again, and always sounds pathetic.
I use to have a friend to confide in, we hung out and it was just us, now she had a messy relationship that regardless of officialities, is not over, now she just talks about him, where did my friend run off to? I want to be an ear if she needs it, but all this talk will not help her move on. she's stuck on that little piece of him that was worth all the shit. And I know just what that's like.
Whenever 2 or 3 of the Ormand kids dissappear (ie go home) I get an overwhelming feeling of how lonely this town feels, even when there is a few of us left, we get bored and run off to different places. Or say we will call and don't. Maybe it because I don't have a home to go home to, this town is all I've got. It's miserable.
Half my friends from school, when I see them it's something quaint and nonchalant. Like when I went by Matt Hodges house (who lives down the street from me but we haven't seen much of each other all summer) It was trite, it wouldn't even have made a difference if I went by or not. Is that was life is like? we all go to each other's houses and make small talk about shit we aren't even interested in, just to feel less alone?
I saw her again, at a party, and she waved at me and smiled, end of my fucking life, it would be easier not to appreciate her and care about her or want to hang out with her if she was the same caliber of bitch all the time.
My family is obsessed with guns, and my superhero influenced philosophy of life is starting to see maybe they aren't entirely paranoid. You need a sword to protect the innocent, you need a weapon to stand up for justice.
Nobody calls me much, have I become that kid? who hangs out with multiple groups of people, and am even welcomed. But only to be accepted into plans, not invited. To be enjoyed when in company, but not thought about when not. I'm feeling really fucking miserable here.
I don't know if I'll be able to save enough for New England, along with books and rent, but I'm trying, I have to get some mileage in me or I'll die.
I am dying.