Wendell Berry - Sabbaths 1998, VI
By expenditure of hope,
Intelligence, and work,
You think you have it fixed.
It is unfixed by rule.
Within the darkness, all
Is being changed, and you
Also will be changed.
................................
But won't you be ashamed
To count the passing year
At its mere cost, your debt
Inevitably paid?
For every year is costly,
As you know well. Nothing
Is given that is not
Taken, and nothing taken
That was not first a gift.
The gift is balanced by
Its total loss, and yet,
And yet the light breaks in,
Heaven seizing its moments
Thar are at once its own
And yours. The day ends
And is unending where
The summer tanager,
Warbler, and vireo
Sing as they move along
Illuminated leaves.
Poetry Chaikhana | Wendell Berry - Sabbaths 1998, VI
The inner verses seemed too personal, i felt intrusive, an uninvited stranger. Yes, i have had my losses of people, animals, resources and years, but these were his losses. Yes, he shares them with the world, but i still feel i am intruding. I can't help it.
But the first verse had to go into my journal; there is so much there i need to read. need to feel
"Ir is unfixed by rule." What a fix! What a burden; what a relief.
"Within the darkness all is being changed, and you... That's me the poem is talking about. Come Holy Spirit, get it over with!. If i must be changed let me be changed. But i had hoped the change would fix me. Again, what a fix. For if i change, i will probably need to be changed again, and still not be fixed.
Then the fourth verse: "All that was taken was first a gift" The Lord giveth, the Lord taketh away, blessed by the Lord." Blessed by damned. He's an Indian giver! Excuse me. he's the opposite--He gives like a white man. But no, that's not right either. Because what God takes is a burden i do not recognize as a burden and what She gives is a blessing that i am not yet ready to recognize as such. The Lord giveth and giveth and giveth and giveth. I see the absence of light as darkness but it was not a genuine light i saw by in the first place. In the darkness i may come to a light that is surely a light. But in the darkness before the dawn, it seems very very dark.
"And then the light breaks in."
I could not have appreciated this poem a year ago, perhaps not a week ago. Richard Rohr is setting me up to see the non-duality in it, and thus its beauty, and its hidden hope, hope that was dismissed in the first verse but wont go away,
Intelligence, and work,
You think you have it fixed.
It is unfixed by rule.
Within the darkness, all
Is being changed, and you
Also will be changed.
................................
But won't you be ashamed
To count the passing year
At its mere cost, your debt
Inevitably paid?
For every year is costly,
As you know well. Nothing
Is given that is not
Taken, and nothing taken
That was not first a gift.
The gift is balanced by
Its total loss, and yet,
And yet the light breaks in,
Heaven seizing its moments
Thar are at once its own
And yours. The day ends
And is unending where
The summer tanager,
Warbler, and vireo
Sing as they move along
Illuminated leaves.
Poetry Chaikhana | Wendell Berry - Sabbaths 1998, VI
The inner verses seemed too personal, i felt intrusive, an uninvited stranger. Yes, i have had my losses of people, animals, resources and years, but these were his losses. Yes, he shares them with the world, but i still feel i am intruding. I can't help it.
But the first verse had to go into my journal; there is so much there i need to read. need to feel
"Ir is unfixed by rule." What a fix! What a burden; what a relief.
"Within the darkness all is being changed, and you... That's me the poem is talking about. Come Holy Spirit, get it over with!. If i must be changed let me be changed. But i had hoped the change would fix me. Again, what a fix. For if i change, i will probably need to be changed again, and still not be fixed.
Then the fourth verse: "All that was taken was first a gift" The Lord giveth, the Lord taketh away, blessed by the Lord." Blessed by damned. He's an Indian giver! Excuse me. he's the opposite--He gives like a white man. But no, that's not right either. Because what God takes is a burden i do not recognize as a burden and what She gives is a blessing that i am not yet ready to recognize as such. The Lord giveth and giveth and giveth and giveth. I see the absence of light as darkness but it was not a genuine light i saw by in the first place. In the darkness i may come to a light that is surely a light. But in the darkness before the dawn, it seems very very dark.
"And then the light breaks in."
I could not have appreciated this poem a year ago, perhaps not a week ago. Richard Rohr is setting me up to see the non-duality in it, and thus its beauty, and its hidden hope, hope that was dismissed in the first verse but wont go away,