(no subject)
In the city of Chicago, the denizens are been plagued by rain that refuses to come down from straight above, as they feel rain should. In response, they are constantly purchasing larger and larger umbrellas to shield themselves from this obvious mistake of nature. In highly concentrated areas of pedestrian movement, a sort-of ad hoc game of bumbershoot-bumper-cars takes places in which the winner tends to be the most aggressive with the largest umbrella; the loser is anyone not in the possesion of an umbrella, who also is in possession of a pair of eyes. If you desire to travel without an umbrella, experts suggest to carry safety glasses in case of a sudden downpour.