A Public Service Announcement

[bob_the_trout]

There is a threat out there that people for the most part ignore. But it could strike any moment, and the effects of it are life altering. So in honor of Genderswitch Awareness Week (which starts Sunday) the MFLE has asked me to make a public service announcement on the impending danger that is genderswitching.

You may feel that it is a stupid thing to call a threat. That something like genderswitching could never happen to you. But it is in fact a very real danger in the lives of millions of people. Especially those from anime or manga. Many individuals that believed they were in no danger have found themselves missing a cock and sporting a pair of ample breasts, and in some cases it could have easily been avoided. Here are some pointers to help you do so:

• Avoid cursed springs. In fact, avoid anything with the word 'cursed' in the title. Other than potentially switching your gender said items can cause a whole lot of other trouble. Which is why 'cursed' was in their title. TO WARN YOU NOT TO TOUCH IT!
• Mad scientists - No offense to those of you that may BE mad scientists, but avoid them. Their experimenting on people and/or people consuming any potions that they happen to have cooked up is one of the leading causes of genderswitching.
• Talk to your family about any odd "genetic quirks" that they may have forgotten to tell you. Genderswitching can be genetic. While you may not be able to stop it in this case, you can at least be prepared with the money for an emergency sex-change procedure when it happens.
• Stay out of the way of aliens. Even well-meaning ones can mess up your gender.
• DON'T piss of any gods, deities, or people with magical powers. Like Mary. It's just a BAD idea.
• When you see a sign that reads "no mortals past this point" in the MFLE, don't pass that point and blow things up. And don't let anyone you know do so either. Issues and misfiling at the MFLE are the leading cause of genderswitching. Just alter one word on the file that determines who you are and you go from being male to female.

Now, even with following all of these steps accidents are known to happen. An alien spaceship might crash into you, your father might force you into a cursed spring- it really doesn't matter. The point is, you may one day fear that you have just undergone a genderswitch. BUT DON'T PANIC! Instead go over the following things to be sure of what's going on and how you should react:

• Make sure that your gender really changed. Sometimes fangirls just like to make characters cross dress, in which case you are just suffering from gender confusion, which is easily cured by a thwap from a friendly clue trout like myself.
• If you indeed have switched genders stay calm and think. Is it possible that you were meant to live life as the opposite gender? God occasionally makes a mistake after all (Just look at Mary), and the genderswitch could just be his way of saying 'lol, my bad".
• Keep an eye out for anything else that might be wrong with the situation. If everyone else seems out of whack you probably have either slipped into an alternate dimension or something bad happened at the MFLE. Either way, things will be sorted out before long.
• Make sure that you are not in a hentai game universe before you do anything past this point. If you even breath funny you WILL be forced into sex by anyone in the proximity.
• Watch out for members of the opposite gender. Now that you have switched genders you will be irresistible, and will no doubt attract many suitors. DO NOT spaz at these people or insist that you aren't interested. Instead play along- and at the first chance go into a long, graphic, and totally fictional description of your "sex-change operation". This usually will deter them.
• If you've decided that you MUST change back to your proper gender look into the options for doing so. Surgery is good (though not perfect) option for most cases. Cursed springs can usually only be cured with other cursed springs, though. Do NOT go around telling people that you switched gender to begin with, however. There are people that will want to lock you away and study you because of it.

Additionally, before you change back you may want to try some of the following things out:

• An intense study of the body of the opposite gender. I know that for some of you (such as the majority of the tennis boys) this is a chance that you may not ever get again.
• Heterosexual sex.
• Homosexual sex.
• Freaking out all of your friends/family with your new gender.
• Hitting on strangers, and then freaking them out by telling them that you're really a guy/girl.

And remember, boys and girls, laughing at people that have switched genders is not acceptable. Chances are that their switch was unavoidable, and that they find the situation very traumatic. If you laugh at them you will get genderswitched yourself (except not really. That's an empty threat).

Well, I believe that about wraps things up. I was going to try and interview Shishido about his experience suddenly switching gender awhile back, but he didn't want to talk about it.

Anyway! Everyone have a good Genderswitch Awareness week!