The past few days
I actually am in the mood to write. I think I've had to much caffeine today. My life has been all about school and work and trying to fill my nights.
Work has been rather interesting only for the simple fact that I have been whoring myself out to any store that will give me hours. I have to work 6 days a week consisting of two doubles for me to get 35 hours. It's out of control. That was about a week ago.
However time has been FLYING by. I can't get over how I see weeks just fall off the calendar. Anyone else feeling the same? or is it just me.
School, my one class isn't going as well as I had hoped. I am simply not caring. I only care about getting into American which I haven't heard from yet. I show up, I do what I'm asked and I enjoy the work...actually I REALLY enjoy the work. I just, idk. I'm burnt out. I need some real motivation.
Back to work since work is my life these days. I complained to my boss about not getting enough hours. Now I have stacked up to 40 hours this week thanks to another store picking me up. I have a good 35 next week just at my store (Thank god) I hate jumping around although it's given me a lot of practice at working and feeling out other stores. And I'm working thanksgiving. I called my brother to ask if he was working, and he was...therefore we aren't having turkey day on turkey day this year. I chose to work since It will be time and a half....which is.....(drumroll) 15 an hour. So for my one 6 hour shift it's.......(I am such a money loving whore) 90 bucks......FUCK YEAH. Not ! point just a FUCK YEAH. That's what I like to see.
My mother secured a 4 day ski trip to Colorado this year......All I have to pay for is my plane ticket. However I just heard today that she can't get the time off work.....we travel so fucking much...I love it. September, North Florida. October, DC. November, Key West. December, DC/NYC(maybe). January, perhaps Colorado. It's a big world and you're dead for so long.
I've been listening to the Twilight Soundtrack way to much....it's almost unhealthy. I've fallen in love with Robert Pattinson's songs. I've fallen so in love that I actually broke out Midnight Sun, I have yet to read it a second time. However like twilight does I have realized that I missed the company....consistent company...of a boyfriend. I LOVE BEING SINGLE, however I just miss having that best friend. So in search I have made friends with some regulars that come in and they welcomed me into there group with open arms. They were a group of guys and at there head was Nick. Nick had a thing for me for a little while to the point where Shane said "You know he likes you right. You have to make it clear what you're all about" So I said to him, very nicely that I love hanging out with him and he and I are a ton of laughs together however, I'm not interested. "I like you nick and I really enjoy your company but you have heard me speak of not wanting at boy right now." He agreed and said that he thought that was the case but now that it was out in the open we would be more comfortable. Two or three days go by and I'm in my own world. I go down to key west and don't call anyone or text like crazy. I didn't even take my phone charger. I get back and Nick runs into me and I was starving so I offered dinner. At dinner he told me all about her....and I waved goodbye. He was happy that he came out of the shell he was in and that this chick was in one of his classes and she's awesome and blablabla. I was really happy for him and was shocked that he opened up to her so fast and she to him. Then Shane joined us and we all hung out like normal. Then nick came in to the store like old times and when he saw me I mentioned how I hadn't seen him. He was with the girl. He talked of there fun times and all the places they had gone to and I just fell.....
She hung out with the guys just like I had and I got so somber about all of that. So I was around to simply keep your attentions. I didn't say a word but how happy I was for him, and I am, and how I loved hearing how he was happy and so forth. Then he thanked me "Thanks Court."
For what?
"For getting me out of my shell. I don't think any of this would have happened unless you came around first."
Glad I could help.
So they left and I was down for the rest of the night. Dwight text me and picked up my attitude through the text right away. I told him I was low. He asked what he could do and I was like....idk anything? So he picked me up from my house, he drove into the middle of the everglades and we sat in his truck bed.
I couldn't have had a better night. I smoked and layed there enjoying the cold air (It's been in the high 60s at night.) Dwight drank and we chatted. I told him about the idea that NIck had about creating a drive in with my laptop in the night air. He sat up and was like.
"You mean if you had a movie we could be smoking, drinking, and watching a movie in THIS." And held his hands up to the sky. I nodded. Simply nodded. "So when are we doing that then?" And the night after that....thats exactly what we did.
We got blankets and pillows, I bundled up including gloves and a hat and we watched a movie under the stars. He didn't make a move since I asked him not to and I smoked, he drank, and we enjoyed the night.
It was just what the doctor ordered. I actually bought my own stash this week with my extra tip money that I had saved up. Now I have enough to supply me for a while. And I feel like that little time I have to myself is meaning more to me then just about anything else.
So thats how I've been filling my nights. As long as Dwight doesn't make a move I told him that I would love to have him close enough to feel him there. He said that was better than what he'd been up to. He actually said to me "You know Court, I do the bar thing because it's something to do...I don't like doing it."
I know he's not good to look at but he's better than anything else I've got going on now. And it works.......
I won't even mention how his sex was very nice. Thats a bonus if it actually ever got to that. I wouldn't mind the sex.....of course I wouldn't mind the sex.
I want to be bold enough to say that I think he likes having me around too.
Key west was fantastic. I took Dariel and I got SMASHED on duvall street. He made sure that we made it back to the condo and I had advil in my system. We boated at Sand Key and I actually scuba dived. Jake had all his equipment and i tried it all on and went under for a while. I didn't want to come back up really.
So I suppose thats the most of it then. I'm happy to be who I am right now. Anyone just get that feeling once and a while?
-110
Work has been rather interesting only for the simple fact that I have been whoring myself out to any store that will give me hours. I have to work 6 days a week consisting of two doubles for me to get 35 hours. It's out of control. That was about a week ago.
However time has been FLYING by. I can't get over how I see weeks just fall off the calendar. Anyone else feeling the same? or is it just me.
School, my one class isn't going as well as I had hoped. I am simply not caring. I only care about getting into American which I haven't heard from yet. I show up, I do what I'm asked and I enjoy the work...actually I REALLY enjoy the work. I just, idk. I'm burnt out. I need some real motivation.
Back to work since work is my life these days. I complained to my boss about not getting enough hours. Now I have stacked up to 40 hours this week thanks to another store picking me up. I have a good 35 next week just at my store (Thank god) I hate jumping around although it's given me a lot of practice at working and feeling out other stores. And I'm working thanksgiving. I called my brother to ask if he was working, and he was...therefore we aren't having turkey day on turkey day this year. I chose to work since It will be time and a half....which is.....(drumroll) 15 an hour. So for my one 6 hour shift it's.......(I am such a money loving whore) 90 bucks......FUCK YEAH. Not ! point just a FUCK YEAH. That's what I like to see.
My mother secured a 4 day ski trip to Colorado this year......All I have to pay for is my plane ticket. However I just heard today that she can't get the time off work.....we travel so fucking much...I love it. September, North Florida. October, DC. November, Key West. December, DC/NYC(maybe). January, perhaps Colorado. It's a big world and you're dead for so long.
I've been listening to the Twilight Soundtrack way to much....it's almost unhealthy. I've fallen in love with Robert Pattinson's songs. I've fallen so in love that I actually broke out Midnight Sun, I have yet to read it a second time. However like twilight does I have realized that I missed the company....consistent company...of a boyfriend. I LOVE BEING SINGLE, however I just miss having that best friend. So in search I have made friends with some regulars that come in and they welcomed me into there group with open arms. They were a group of guys and at there head was Nick. Nick had a thing for me for a little while to the point where Shane said "You know he likes you right. You have to make it clear what you're all about" So I said to him, very nicely that I love hanging out with him and he and I are a ton of laughs together however, I'm not interested. "I like you nick and I really enjoy your company but you have heard me speak of not wanting at boy right now." He agreed and said that he thought that was the case but now that it was out in the open we would be more comfortable. Two or three days go by and I'm in my own world. I go down to key west and don't call anyone or text like crazy. I didn't even take my phone charger. I get back and Nick runs into me and I was starving so I offered dinner. At dinner he told me all about her....and I waved goodbye. He was happy that he came out of the shell he was in and that this chick was in one of his classes and she's awesome and blablabla. I was really happy for him and was shocked that he opened up to her so fast and she to him. Then Shane joined us and we all hung out like normal. Then nick came in to the store like old times and when he saw me I mentioned how I hadn't seen him. He was with the girl. He talked of there fun times and all the places they had gone to and I just fell.....
She hung out with the guys just like I had and I got so somber about all of that. So I was around to simply keep your attentions. I didn't say a word but how happy I was for him, and I am, and how I loved hearing how he was happy and so forth. Then he thanked me "Thanks Court."
For what?
"For getting me out of my shell. I don't think any of this would have happened unless you came around first."
Glad I could help.
So they left and I was down for the rest of the night. Dwight text me and picked up my attitude through the text right away. I told him I was low. He asked what he could do and I was like....idk anything? So he picked me up from my house, he drove into the middle of the everglades and we sat in his truck bed.
I couldn't have had a better night. I smoked and layed there enjoying the cold air (It's been in the high 60s at night.) Dwight drank and we chatted. I told him about the idea that NIck had about creating a drive in with my laptop in the night air. He sat up and was like.
"You mean if you had a movie we could be smoking, drinking, and watching a movie in THIS." And held his hands up to the sky. I nodded. Simply nodded. "So when are we doing that then?" And the night after that....thats exactly what we did.
We got blankets and pillows, I bundled up including gloves and a hat and we watched a movie under the stars. He didn't make a move since I asked him not to and I smoked, he drank, and we enjoyed the night.
It was just what the doctor ordered. I actually bought my own stash this week with my extra tip money that I had saved up. Now I have enough to supply me for a while. And I feel like that little time I have to myself is meaning more to me then just about anything else.
So thats how I've been filling my nights. As long as Dwight doesn't make a move I told him that I would love to have him close enough to feel him there. He said that was better than what he'd been up to. He actually said to me "You know Court, I do the bar thing because it's something to do...I don't like doing it."
I know he's not good to look at but he's better than anything else I've got going on now. And it works.......
I won't even mention how his sex was very nice. Thats a bonus if it actually ever got to that. I wouldn't mind the sex.....of course I wouldn't mind the sex.
I want to be bold enough to say that I think he likes having me around too.
Key west was fantastic. I took Dariel and I got SMASHED on duvall street. He made sure that we made it back to the condo and I had advil in my system. We boated at Sand Key and I actually scuba dived. Jake had all his equipment and i tried it all on and went under for a while. I didn't want to come back up really.
So I suppose thats the most of it then. I'm happy to be who I am right now. Anyone just get that feeling once and a while?
-110