So this is it.

[bluvanillabrat]

I wanted to run but you told me to stay
I wanted to fly but my wings you have clipped
I wanted to be silent when there was nothing to say
I wanted to hold your hand but away it slipped

I wanted to laugh but my voice you have taken
I wanted to dance while the moon lit the floor
I wanted to love but I feel so forsaken
I wanted your gaze to unfreeze my core.

I want to tell you I wanted to shout
This feeling will not soothe
I can't take it anymore I want out
But the world just won't approve.

They say distance makes the heart grow fonder but I don't seem to agree. I thought I loved him once but now I'm so confused. I must be crazy, yeah that's it. I'm crazy. I know I should end it now and save us all the pain but how do I say it when my own parents are in love with him? They think we'll get married and live our life happily ever after but I don't want that. I'm not ready. I don't know if I love him anymore but I have no choice but to put on a happy face. I'm not looking for sympathy or anything I just needed to get my feelings onto paper (or a computer screen). I've found this to be my therapy.