haha...oh, that's rich, America!
In the true nature of the post-fucking-everything generation, I can't help but view this election with general amusement and bafflement. Like - really? There are REALLY that many people professing to love the candidate, or the party, or hate the other guy/party? I think it's so much more fascinating to analyze the analysts.
I've had a lot of time this summer to dick around on the computer, and have read a bunch of online newspapers and blogs and such. And I find it so ridiculous that people are so opinionated about this election - HOW? How can you have such strong opinions, when all the information we're being given is totally colored by someone's agenda, spun into oblivion, and handed to you in a vacuum-sealed wrapper?
I'm an independent, and fucking proud of it, because I think it's possible to be interested in politics while acknowledging the high level of bullshit involved.
The first thing that had me shaking my head at the election was the bizarre primary season, in which I watched a handful of experienced Democratic candidates get chucked by the wayside to herald the coming of Better-Selling Newspapers, in the form of the first female and black candidates. Did anyone even know there was a Biden campaign?
On the Republican side - and believe me, I sympathize in many ways with the conservative ideology, but not the party of creationism in public schools - at least voters caught wise to Romney's choking fakeness. When asked, Why is it that as governor of Mass, you supported abortion and opposed the death penalty, and now espouse the opposing views?, he just launched into a cartoonish "grateful" speech in which he managed to thank his family, The American People, and not even attempt to answer the question. I know it's standard practice, but really, do we have such a short attention span that we forgot that there was a question he was supposed to be answering? Were people really taken in by his smarm?
The youtube debates were capable of inducing mass suicides. One of the questions was, "How many guns do you own, and which one is your favorite?" REALLY, Republicans? Actually, I'd like to know the answer, so I can promptly choose the favorite one and shoot myself in the stomach with it.
Of course, this anecdote revealed some interesting spin issues. My parents said, "You don't know what you're talking about. That debate was on CNN, a famously liberal media outlet, which probably put in those questions for exactly that reason, to make Republicans look stupid." I repeated this to Steve, who worked for the Edwards campaign. His response was some variant of - "Really? Because I think that the 'liberal media' is still owned by conservative businessmen, who purposely didn't cover the campaigns of Edwards, Biden, Richardson and Dodd. They wanted to advertise and promote the two most polarizing figures, Hillary and Obama, in order to make a Democratic win as tough as possible."
Whom to believe? There's no way of knowing. Both views are likely wrong. which is why, yet again, I have no idea why people are so quick to jump on ANY political bandwagon.
Next it became apparent that the media is in some desperate times. I mean really, how many fake uproars can they manufacture before people get wise that none of this shit really matters? I found it hilarious when every sunk their claws into some comments Obama made, and all of a sudden we had a new "fiasco" onto which we could tack a "-gate" suffix: "Bittergate." (joining the company of such stars as "Nipplegate".)The pundits were railing! they were fired up! they were convinced that Obama was finished, that voters would recoil and angrily rally to the sides of McCain!.......oh wait. NOTHING HAPPENED. No one cared.
Now maybe you've all noticed the hilarious game of "Which campaign can disown these remarks faster?" race. Round One: Wesley Clark is asked about whether or not Obama has the military chops to be commander-in-chief. When he responds in the affirmative, the interviewer presses on that John McCain flew a plane and was shot down! Clark countered that flying a plane and getting shot down does not qualify one to be president. That's it! All hell breaks loose! General Wesley Clark was seriously denigrating McCain's military service! We demand an apology for this disrespect! Obama quickly stepped up to the plate and delivered the severance. Round Two: Phil Gramm says that America is a nation of whiners and that our economic hardships are in our heads. Pandemonium! Apocalypse! This was the guy, after all, who McCain supported for a presidental bid over a decade ago! What, you didn't know that, Mr. Louie Jones of Nebraska? I mean, don't you think this says a lot about McCain, since OBVIOUSLY he was planning on making Gramm his Secretary of Treasury? McCain scored extra points for a humorous put-down, saying that Phil Gramm probably had a spot in the McCain administration, as the ambassador to Belarus. (Belarus is pissed! Pissed, I tell you! They don't want to deal with no America-hatin' banker! Uproar! Catastrophe!) Most recently, Jesse Jackson announced his desire to cut Obama's balls off. Oh, and then there was the New Yorker cover where coastal Americans were terrified that them rednecks in flyover country might not be too keen on the whole, irony thing. I mean, they're...they're UNEDUCATED, right? And racist? What if they look at the cover and really think Obama wears a turban in the privacy of his own home?!?!?! THE HORROR! GODDAMN YOU NEW YORKER AND YOUR CHEEKY WIT!
I mean, really. It's just pitiful, how starved these 24-hour news networks are for actual stories. Everything's a calamity that will surely give us volumes of information that need to be interpreted 24/7, because it HAS to be. When it's not. Yet then they wonder why the predictions aren't matching up with the polls. Who really gives a shit?
The Veep speculation is similarly pathetic. People need to focus on the fact that hey, our country actually has some problems. Is the fact that Romney's dad was governor of Michigan a bazillion years ago REALLY going to influence the people in the Detroit polls? How are we even supposed to know what we're voting on if the dialogue is about motherfucking flag pins?
And how about the public outcry that the liberal savior Obama has "all of a sudden" dashed to the center? I really love Gail Collins' column when she was like, "um....what Obama are YOU talking about? The Obama I know was always kind of vague about everything, and never really talked about specific policies. Why are you shocked that he's articulating his policy positions now and they don't match up to your pedestal image of him?" People say, oh, but he's such an inspirational speaker, talking about bridging the partisan gap! And then other people respond with what they think is a witty, "You know who else was a great orator? HITLER." and continue spreading the word that Obama's just a demagogue.
It's especially funny because this election is viewed as revolutionary, that people are swarming into political activism and the names Obama and McCain are on everyone's tongues. And yet I'm just really not inspired by either of the candidates. Neither party really matches my stance on the issues, and neither character is particularly compelling to me. I honestly have no idea for whom I'll vote in November. I still feel as though I really don't have enough information to pass judgment either way.
I care about the economy; employment is looming ever-nearer, and it is going to SUCK to have to enter such a shitty job market. But whose plan for the economy is better? Will McCain do more of the same shitty Bush economic "management," or will Obama's tax-raising be more destructive? I care about energy, obviously. McCain was transparent enough to support the idiocy of the gas-tax holiday, and I'm glad that Obama is making a distinction between offshore drilling as a quick fix to gas prices vs. a piece of a desperately-needed long-term energy strategy.
But what does that even come to? It's so difficult for me to believe that either of these men will be a transformative figure that puts all their words into actions. They have entire administration that will be the architects of the nation's agenda. Why does McCain's lack of economic awareness matter if he takes on the best economists? Why does Obama's lack of military service matter if it's the generals who will make all the decisions?
And most of all: Why am I even writing about this stuff, if my two possible voting arenas (New Jersey and Massachusetts) are going to go blue regardless of how I cast my vote? Why aren't we talking about dumbly the American political system is structured, such that every single fucking election hinges on Ohio and Florida?
It boggles the mind. But I guess my POV should be put out there, so that years from now, when political strategists are trying to figure out how to play into the minds of the young independents, they can maybe get a clue.
Politically yours,
Shenoodle.
I've had a lot of time this summer to dick around on the computer, and have read a bunch of online newspapers and blogs and such. And I find it so ridiculous that people are so opinionated about this election - HOW? How can you have such strong opinions, when all the information we're being given is totally colored by someone's agenda, spun into oblivion, and handed to you in a vacuum-sealed wrapper?
I'm an independent, and fucking proud of it, because I think it's possible to be interested in politics while acknowledging the high level of bullshit involved.
The first thing that had me shaking my head at the election was the bizarre primary season, in which I watched a handful of experienced Democratic candidates get chucked by the wayside to herald the coming of Better-Selling Newspapers, in the form of the first female and black candidates. Did anyone even know there was a Biden campaign?
On the Republican side - and believe me, I sympathize in many ways with the conservative ideology, but not the party of creationism in public schools - at least voters caught wise to Romney's choking fakeness. When asked, Why is it that as governor of Mass, you supported abortion and opposed the death penalty, and now espouse the opposing views?, he just launched into a cartoonish "grateful" speech in which he managed to thank his family, The American People, and not even attempt to answer the question. I know it's standard practice, but really, do we have such a short attention span that we forgot that there was a question he was supposed to be answering? Were people really taken in by his smarm?
The youtube debates were capable of inducing mass suicides. One of the questions was, "How many guns do you own, and which one is your favorite?" REALLY, Republicans? Actually, I'd like to know the answer, so I can promptly choose the favorite one and shoot myself in the stomach with it.
Of course, this anecdote revealed some interesting spin issues. My parents said, "You don't know what you're talking about. That debate was on CNN, a famously liberal media outlet, which probably put in those questions for exactly that reason, to make Republicans look stupid." I repeated this to Steve, who worked for the Edwards campaign. His response was some variant of - "Really? Because I think that the 'liberal media' is still owned by conservative businessmen, who purposely didn't cover the campaigns of Edwards, Biden, Richardson and Dodd. They wanted to advertise and promote the two most polarizing figures, Hillary and Obama, in order to make a Democratic win as tough as possible."
Whom to believe? There's no way of knowing. Both views are likely wrong. which is why, yet again, I have no idea why people are so quick to jump on ANY political bandwagon.
Next it became apparent that the media is in some desperate times. I mean really, how many fake uproars can they manufacture before people get wise that none of this shit really matters? I found it hilarious when every sunk their claws into some comments Obama made, and all of a sudden we had a new "fiasco" onto which we could tack a "-gate" suffix: "Bittergate." (joining the company of such stars as "Nipplegate".)The pundits were railing! they were fired up! they were convinced that Obama was finished, that voters would recoil and angrily rally to the sides of McCain!.......oh wait. NOTHING HAPPENED. No one cared.
Now maybe you've all noticed the hilarious game of "Which campaign can disown these remarks faster?" race. Round One: Wesley Clark is asked about whether or not Obama has the military chops to be commander-in-chief. When he responds in the affirmative, the interviewer presses on that John McCain flew a plane and was shot down! Clark countered that flying a plane and getting shot down does not qualify one to be president. That's it! All hell breaks loose! General Wesley Clark was seriously denigrating McCain's military service! We demand an apology for this disrespect! Obama quickly stepped up to the plate and delivered the severance. Round Two: Phil Gramm says that America is a nation of whiners and that our economic hardships are in our heads. Pandemonium! Apocalypse! This was the guy, after all, who McCain supported for a presidental bid over a decade ago! What, you didn't know that, Mr. Louie Jones of Nebraska? I mean, don't you think this says a lot about McCain, since OBVIOUSLY he was planning on making Gramm his Secretary of Treasury? McCain scored extra points for a humorous put-down, saying that Phil Gramm probably had a spot in the McCain administration, as the ambassador to Belarus. (Belarus is pissed! Pissed, I tell you! They don't want to deal with no America-hatin' banker! Uproar! Catastrophe!) Most recently, Jesse Jackson announced his desire to cut Obama's balls off. Oh, and then there was the New Yorker cover where coastal Americans were terrified that them rednecks in flyover country might not be too keen on the whole, irony thing. I mean, they're...they're UNEDUCATED, right? And racist? What if they look at the cover and really think Obama wears a turban in the privacy of his own home?!?!?! THE HORROR! GODDAMN YOU NEW YORKER AND YOUR CHEEKY WIT!
I mean, really. It's just pitiful, how starved these 24-hour news networks are for actual stories. Everything's a calamity that will surely give us volumes of information that need to be interpreted 24/7, because it HAS to be. When it's not. Yet then they wonder why the predictions aren't matching up with the polls. Who really gives a shit?
The Veep speculation is similarly pathetic. People need to focus on the fact that hey, our country actually has some problems. Is the fact that Romney's dad was governor of Michigan a bazillion years ago REALLY going to influence the people in the Detroit polls? How are we even supposed to know what we're voting on if the dialogue is about motherfucking flag pins?
And how about the public outcry that the liberal savior Obama has "all of a sudden" dashed to the center? I really love Gail Collins' column when she was like, "um....what Obama are YOU talking about? The Obama I know was always kind of vague about everything, and never really talked about specific policies. Why are you shocked that he's articulating his policy positions now and they don't match up to your pedestal image of him?" People say, oh, but he's such an inspirational speaker, talking about bridging the partisan gap! And then other people respond with what they think is a witty, "You know who else was a great orator? HITLER." and continue spreading the word that Obama's just a demagogue.
It's especially funny because this election is viewed as revolutionary, that people are swarming into political activism and the names Obama and McCain are on everyone's tongues. And yet I'm just really not inspired by either of the candidates. Neither party really matches my stance on the issues, and neither character is particularly compelling to me. I honestly have no idea for whom I'll vote in November. I still feel as though I really don't have enough information to pass judgment either way.
I care about the economy; employment is looming ever-nearer, and it is going to SUCK to have to enter such a shitty job market. But whose plan for the economy is better? Will McCain do more of the same shitty Bush economic "management," or will Obama's tax-raising be more destructive? I care about energy, obviously. McCain was transparent enough to support the idiocy of the gas-tax holiday, and I'm glad that Obama is making a distinction between offshore drilling as a quick fix to gas prices vs. a piece of a desperately-needed long-term energy strategy.
But what does that even come to? It's so difficult for me to believe that either of these men will be a transformative figure that puts all their words into actions. They have entire administration that will be the architects of the nation's agenda. Why does McCain's lack of economic awareness matter if he takes on the best economists? Why does Obama's lack of military service matter if it's the generals who will make all the decisions?
And most of all: Why am I even writing about this stuff, if my two possible voting arenas (New Jersey and Massachusetts) are going to go blue regardless of how I cast my vote? Why aren't we talking about dumbly the American political system is structured, such that every single fucking election hinges on Ohio and Florida?
It boggles the mind. But I guess my POV should be put out there, so that years from now, when political strategists are trying to figure out how to play into the minds of the young independents, they can maybe get a clue.
Politically yours,
Shenoodle.