i love my husband

[blugrassgurrl]

sometimes, it really surprises me how happy i am like this. this life i mean. its not what i ever imagined my life as an adult being like. but i am very grateful to be here and realize i am lucky every day. my husband is a great man, who takes care of me and loves me more than anyone else has ever loved me. i dont know what i could have possibly done to deserve this, especially since there have been times i did not love him as well as i should have. but i am glad i have it. i feel safe, i feel content. i am not searching for more in the person i am with. he gives me his all, and im only glad i can recognize and appreciate that. he is going to be an insanely good father and partner, and all i could ever ask for in a husband. i cannot wait to raise this baby together. its funny how i used to rebel against any time of conformed lifestyle, but it really does suit me. i enjoy the housewife schtick, and will love being a mother. i love being a wife. i love the certainty that comes with all this. i know who i am, what i want, and what to do. sure, we may never end up anything more than an average american family with two and a half kids and a house in suburbia, but honestly....where else would i rather be? my younger self would kick my ass. but maybe not. coz she's still around when i need her. haha. anyways. i just wanted to gush a little about the things i never knew i'd want and need.

and because men are simple to please, to show my gratitude i did not shower him with fancy words. i let him play his golf video game for a few hours without bitching, bought him a pizza for dinner, and gave him a beej.