we dont have to be in love.. we can just be friends..
So. hung out w/ Steph and Katelyn tonite. it was great. I miss having girls nite outs... def having many many more of those.. high school brought us all sooo far apart, it sux. Notto was suppose to hang out with us too but I dunno.. she never called me. MISS U GIRLS!
Anyways. why is it that you always want what you cant have? Is there something wrong with us girls? .so. theres this one guy.. known for years, theres this connection.. I feel it. I could see him 20 times a day or 5 times a year and its always there.. I feel it when he hugs me. but then.. I feel it, and its wicked strong and then I get the chance to have him and Im like wait.. what?! I dont get it... why do we do this? and it sux more bc I know he is good for me... well I think he is.. I have my doubts but for the most part, hes sucha sweetie. I dunno. ....................... but there is this one fellow.. we're hanging out next week, dinner and movie, lol. kinda wanna see where that goes.. even if it doesnt go anywhere, thats fine bc I dont even think I want a relationship and he is a great person to be friends with. and then theres someone else (he knows who he is) who is perfect. would treat me great, respect me, knows Kayla and doesnt mind. theres NOTHING wrong with him and I push him away.. I can only be friends.. why I wont give him a shot, I dunno. maybe Im not ready for a relationship? maybe Im just completely lost in life and love, lol. I feel helpless.. I havent been in a relationship in so long.. well besides Scott and that wasnt even a relationship.. that was me.. LIKING him A LOT and him using me.. wow, Im soft. blah.. i just say blah!
OH. So Keebs was driving my car today.. testing it for me. I guess my brakes are fine, hes gonna take a better look but he tells me something I do NOT wanna hear.. something else might be wrong with it thats gonna cost me a whole lotta money I do NOT have... yea so I wanna cry right now. NOT TOO HAPPY! hes gotta take a better look, like inside of the car not just driving to tell me... ARGH! pray for me......
.*never settle for anything less than a fairytale*.