(no subject)
The crimson drop slipped through the small crevice, squeezing through and falling what seemed like a thousand feet into the tiny pool that had formed beneath the pale cream colored mountain with peaks, curling inwards showing that it was actually a hand. It moved, another pale hand coming over and placing a blanket of cotton over the fresh cut across the wrist of this poor soul. The blade was sitting behind the hands on the corner of the sink, a thin line of blood still present which was slowly wiped away on the blanket of cotton that was just removed from the wrist before being tossed into the toilet and being flushed. Hands braced on either corner of the sink, pale, lifeless blue eyes looked down at the hands, closing the blade slowly, and tucking it into her back pocket. A strand of brownish blonde hair fell into her eyes and she pushed it back, looking up into the mirror at the emotionless reflection. Oval face, messy short blonde-brown hair, blue eyes and glasses, though her glasses were sitting behind the handle of the faucet, not wanting them to be in the way as she finished what she was doing.
Turning on the cold water faucet, then twisting the hot slightly, she tested the water with her finger tips before cupping her hands and pressing the nuke warm water to her face, letting it drip from her features back into the rush of the water floating down the drain. Water ran down her arms leaving a long crimson trail after passing over her wrist, she frowned slightly, shutting off the water, pulled up her small red towel and wiping the bloodied water from her arm then turning the cloth over and drying her face. She looked back at the mirror, frowned at the reflection peering back at her and raised her middle finger at it. She sighed and shook her head, not understanding why she did these things, pulling black sleeves down from being rolled up and sticking her thumbs through the appropriate holes she put into the fabric, covering any trace of her mutilated wrists, no one knew; friends, family, girlfriend, none of them knew and they didn't need to know. She turned off the light to her bathroom, closing the door partially behind her and walked across the hall into her room closing her door completely behind her, hearing the small click of the latch catching, she was satisfied enough to lean against the wood and slide down the back of her door to sit on the ground, legs bent up in front of her which she leaned forward on, propping her chin upon her knees.
Her eyes closed as she took deep breaths taking in the wonderful scent of her Dragon Catcher's incense, turning her head to the side and resting her cheek on her knees, her eyes lined up with a picture directly in front of her. It showed four girls standing in a makeshift "Charlie's Angels" position. They were all smiling and having fun, enjoying the party they were at. She sighed, closing her eyes again and stood, walking to her bed and laying down on her back staring up at the ceiling for a moment, then reaching behind her under the small mass of stuffed animals to find the remote to her stereo. Pointing the control at the stereo across the room, she pressed a button and the machine came to life, blaring alternative rock from one of her favorite stations, but she turned this off and switched the machine to play her CDs. Clicking the 'change disc' a few times she let the chosen CD begin playing then switched to the 6th song and listened to the introduction of it beginning to sing softly with the hard metal that was playing:
I know your life is empty
And you hate to face this world alone
So you're searching for an angel.
Someone who can make you whole...
I cannot save you, I can't even save myself
I know that you've been damaged
your soul has suffered such abuse
but I am not your savior
I am just as fucked as you...
I cannot save you, I can't even save myself
Please don't take pity on me
My life has been a nightmare
my soul is fractured to the bone
so if I must be lonely
I think I'd rather be alone
You cannot save me
you can't even save yourself...
I cannot save you... I can't even save myself
Her voice died with the closing of the music, eyes closed to cut off the trail of tears that were running down either side of her face. She turned to her side and curled inwards wiping the tears away with her sleeve and pulled the blue and white fuzzy shark to her, holding it close and burying her face against it the tears beginning to find their way to the surface again. She curled even tighter, squeezing the shark with her hands, then releasing slowly and uncrunching her body she cleared her throat and sat up slowly, wiping the tears away, turning the volume of her stereo down as the small jingle played on her phone. She picked up the phone, looking at the caller ID to double check who it was then answered it in a quiet voice, fear of her recent sobbing showing through with cracks. Closing the phone, she put it into her pocket and picked up her keys walking from the room, keys jingling in her fingers as she left through the front door without even a notice to her mother that was sleeping in the reclining chair. No one even knew how she felt and no one ever would, she didn't share those kinds of emotions with anyone, she didn't want to bring them down also. Back in her room, the shark lay sideways on her pillow, a red streak lined up with its eye from where the girl was gripping it and her newly cut flesh had begun seeping blood again.
Turning on the cold water faucet, then twisting the hot slightly, she tested the water with her finger tips before cupping her hands and pressing the nuke warm water to her face, letting it drip from her features back into the rush of the water floating down the drain. Water ran down her arms leaving a long crimson trail after passing over her wrist, she frowned slightly, shutting off the water, pulled up her small red towel and wiping the bloodied water from her arm then turning the cloth over and drying her face. She looked back at the mirror, frowned at the reflection peering back at her and raised her middle finger at it. She sighed and shook her head, not understanding why she did these things, pulling black sleeves down from being rolled up and sticking her thumbs through the appropriate holes she put into the fabric, covering any trace of her mutilated wrists, no one knew; friends, family, girlfriend, none of them knew and they didn't need to know. She turned off the light to her bathroom, closing the door partially behind her and walked across the hall into her room closing her door completely behind her, hearing the small click of the latch catching, she was satisfied enough to lean against the wood and slide down the back of her door to sit on the ground, legs bent up in front of her which she leaned forward on, propping her chin upon her knees.
Her eyes closed as she took deep breaths taking in the wonderful scent of her Dragon Catcher's incense, turning her head to the side and resting her cheek on her knees, her eyes lined up with a picture directly in front of her. It showed four girls standing in a makeshift "Charlie's Angels" position. They were all smiling and having fun, enjoying the party they were at. She sighed, closing her eyes again and stood, walking to her bed and laying down on her back staring up at the ceiling for a moment, then reaching behind her under the small mass of stuffed animals to find the remote to her stereo. Pointing the control at the stereo across the room, she pressed a button and the machine came to life, blaring alternative rock from one of her favorite stations, but she turned this off and switched the machine to play her CDs. Clicking the 'change disc' a few times she let the chosen CD begin playing then switched to the 6th song and listened to the introduction of it beginning to sing softly with the hard metal that was playing:
I know your life is empty
And you hate to face this world alone
So you're searching for an angel.
Someone who can make you whole...
I cannot save you, I can't even save myself
I know that you've been damaged
your soul has suffered such abuse
but I am not your savior
I am just as fucked as you...
I cannot save you, I can't even save myself
Please don't take pity on me
My life has been a nightmare
my soul is fractured to the bone
so if I must be lonely
I think I'd rather be alone
You cannot save me
you can't even save yourself...
I cannot save you... I can't even save myself
Her voice died with the closing of the music, eyes closed to cut off the trail of tears that were running down either side of her face. She turned to her side and curled inwards wiping the tears away with her sleeve and pulled the blue and white fuzzy shark to her, holding it close and burying her face against it the tears beginning to find their way to the surface again. She curled even tighter, squeezing the shark with her hands, then releasing slowly and uncrunching her body she cleared her throat and sat up slowly, wiping the tears away, turning the volume of her stereo down as the small jingle played on her phone. She picked up the phone, looking at the caller ID to double check who it was then answered it in a quiet voice, fear of her recent sobbing showing through with cracks. Closing the phone, she put it into her pocket and picked up her keys walking from the room, keys jingling in her fingers as she left through the front door without even a notice to her mother that was sleeping in the reclining chair. No one even knew how she felt and no one ever would, she didn't share those kinds of emotions with anyone, she didn't want to bring them down also. Back in her room, the shark lay sideways on her pillow, a red streak lined up with its eye from where the girl was gripping it and her newly cut flesh had begun seeping blood again.