WIP - Untitled Cut & Run FanFic - 2nd Draft

[bluesylver]

Untitled WIP
Author: bluesylver
Fandom: Cut & Run by Abigail Roux
Characters: Zane & Becky Garrett
Warnings: Swearing, m/f sex, long ass sentences, past perfect tense

Comments

[bluesylver]

Reading through again it looks like I managed to get the dialog incorporated correctly some of the time. I was rereading some of the series for reference and noticed Abi using some of the same attributions as I did, so I don't feel so bad. Minions love the books, so they probably won't be too bothered with it in my story. I'll probably still try to correct it at some point.

I reread the Zane/Becky scene in T&G and Zane calls Becky both sweetie and honey, so yay! I don't have to change those bits.

Does thirteen seem totally unbelievable to you? I might make him a year or so older, but just from personal experience 13 is when your ego is really fragile and little things can have a lasting impact. Also, I think I was confusing Zane with Eric Bana and thinking he had a birthday coming up in August. I didn't really specify but the backstory is set near the end of the school year, late May or early June. Do you know when Zane was born?

In Stars and Stripes Harrison muses that Zane had been a cold and distant man and now with Ty Zane had a warmth Harrison
never thought he'd see.

That passage just makes me think it's been so long, Harrison can't remember a time when Zane wasn't like that. I think part of the reason Harrison viewed Zane that way is that Zane is an introvert and Harrison just misjudged his manner. I still think Zane must have been really young when he began hiding his feelings from everyone for them all to be convinced he was a cold person.

I'll have to consult the minions about Becky's family since I don't want this to be AU and I've written her father deceased. Maybe I can give her a sibling that died if her father outlived her.

After thinking about my story as a whole, I'm leaning away from "Horsing Around" as the title. The story is filled with beginnings and endings. It' s the first time Zane feels attracted to a man and in a way the start of his relationship with Ty. In the backstory it is the beginning of his romantic relationship with Becky and the first time he affects the cold demeanor of his mother. It is the end of his aspirations to become an artist and when he first became convinced his family didn't care about him. I've set the main story on their last day in NOLA and based on the timeline of events in T&G, this is practically the last time they will be together before Becky dies.

So now I'm trying to come up with a word or phrase that will encompass all that. Wish me luck. ;)

Sylvia