My Wife

[bluesidhe]

I've been a bit off kilter since P-Con ended. Shari has been out of one of her prime medications that keeps her from being hypomanic (sp?). She's been having nightly dreams that have her convulsing in bed at night, and waking up from nightmares. The other day I had to hold her while she cried in fear. I had to wake her up because her breathing was convulsive, and I knew she was in trouble. In her dream she could not breathe and was in terror of something coming after her. She cried for an hour until she finally settled down. My poor lass! We've both tried sleeping on the couch so I can get some sleep, but while it's comfortable, we're not use to it. Also, she has been REALLY INTENSE! It makes it hard for me to relax, and increases my stress exponentially. I'm good at handling her, but when she doesn't have her meds, it can be trying, believe me! Fortunately we know what is going on, so it's workable and we can fix it. She sees her doctor tomorrow. Since we have not been able to pay for this expensive medication, the doctor is kind enough to give her samples to keep her calm until I get paid. I'm tired though...Ugh! However, I may experience first hand what Shari is going through and work with her to get her through it without it becoming more of a problem, but I would NEVER want to go through what she does! I love her, and feel sorry that she has to deal with life with such chemical imbalances that her mind gives out...To be in Shari's head when she is not on meds is something I would not wish on anyone!

I love my Shari, and my love is strong. But, I need some sleep!