Untitled fic. Rogue. 216 words.
I could handle it, I think, if it weren't for the bouts of desperate wanting. The sudden need that sneaks up inexplicably and without warning. The hunger, and the longing, and the depression that goes along with it.
If it weren't for all that it'd be cake.
I try to fend it off of course, distract myself with a book, or a movie, or the internet. But I eventually (always) give in. Locking myself away somewhere for a few hours to cry and wallow in self-pity.
I never tell anyone, because what could they do about it? They couldn't change it. Make it better. Make it different. Make it hurt less. So what's the point?
I will never have what other people have. Ever.
I know that.
It's an unavoidable truth, like the sky being blue, grass green, or fire hot. And I've accepted it, for the most part. But that doesn't make it any easier. Doesn't make the wanting any less desperate, doesn't make the need any less heart wrenching.
Not that anyone would ever know.
Keep up the facade, keep up the brave front, keep pretending to be unaffected and no one will ever know.
Because what good would it do if they did?
What could they possibly do for me if they knew?
~fin~
If it weren't for all that it'd be cake.
I try to fend it off of course, distract myself with a book, or a movie, or the internet. But I eventually (always) give in. Locking myself away somewhere for a few hours to cry and wallow in self-pity.
I never tell anyone, because what could they do about it? They couldn't change it. Make it better. Make it different. Make it hurt less. So what's the point?
I will never have what other people have. Ever.
I know that.
It's an unavoidable truth, like the sky being blue, grass green, or fire hot. And I've accepted it, for the most part. But that doesn't make it any easier. Doesn't make the wanting any less desperate, doesn't make the need any less heart wrenching.
Not that anyone would ever know.
Keep up the facade, keep up the brave front, keep pretending to be unaffected and no one will ever know.
Because what good would it do if they did?
What could they possibly do for me if they knew?
~fin~