it's funny because it's not really that sad
I met up with a Long Lost Friend tonight. She fell off the frickin' face of the the world for a year--just *poof*. No more friend. I knew her through PM's group; in fact, she was the only friend I retained from his crowd. The trouble with it all, back then, was that she hated that crowd of people (as did I), but she felt stuck with them because they were her bf's friends. It seemed that every conversation we had in the past was about how shitty those people acted. I'd hash out how PM and I devolved, and she'd air her grievances about her fella. I was so glad I was out of the immediate drama, and I only wished she would find her way out of it too.
Well, she did! So guess what we talked about tonight--yup, that shitty group of people and the bs to which our respective boyfriends subjected us. Ah, the good ol' days... Still, it's nice to have her back in my little world. It also lightened my mood and reminded me that I not only got out of a dismissive and emotionally stunting relationship over a year ago, but that--in comparison--what I'm feeling right now about this last guy is not even a fraction as crippling, it's just more present.
I took a nice walk from the LES to the Canal/Broadway station in Chinatown, sans headphones. I admired the clothing designs impossibly out of reach. Took note of new graffiti aimed at the latest economic crisis. I even smiled when "Bittersweet Symphony" wafted out of a passing car's speakers. Along the way, my sister called to check on my progress and pick my brain over something "super secret squirrel" stuff.
"How are you doing?" she asked.
I chuckled in spite of myself and said, "You know, I was just thinking how I was going to live."
Well, she did! So guess what we talked about tonight--yup, that shitty group of people and the bs to which our respective boyfriends subjected us. Ah, the good ol' days... Still, it's nice to have her back in my little world. It also lightened my mood and reminded me that I not only got out of a dismissive and emotionally stunting relationship over a year ago, but that--in comparison--what I'm feeling right now about this last guy is not even a fraction as crippling, it's just more present.
I took a nice walk from the LES to the Canal/Broadway station in Chinatown, sans headphones. I admired the clothing designs impossibly out of reach. Took note of new graffiti aimed at the latest economic crisis. I even smiled when "Bittersweet Symphony" wafted out of a passing car's speakers. Along the way, my sister called to check on my progress and pick my brain over something "super secret squirrel" stuff.
"How are you doing?" she asked.
I chuckled in spite of myself and said, "You know, I was just thinking how I was going to live."