working on up..
me and ryan arent perfect again..but we are working on it..i told him to give me a day, so we didn't talk yesterday..but he sent me a long-ass email and it in he asked 'what makes you happy?' so i thought about it..and he had an away message on..so i sent him this..
me: just to let you know..what makes me happy..is to be able to say that you are my boyfriend..that i am in love with you..and that you say you are in love with me..that i read your info and i know YOU wrote that..knowing i have someone to turn to when my life is hell >like right now..but i cant talk to you..< ..being able to brag about you, us..having my binder COVERED in pictures of us..having a countdown in my school calendar- i cross out a number each day..that homecoming worked out for US..that i get another dance picture with you..that we have made it a MoNTH since you left..that i never in my wildest dreams, wait..i did used to dream for this! to fall in love..to find my guy, the right guy..my wish-come-true, my ment-to-be..
Auto response from Ry: Studying....and going over flight op. stuff....leave a message...
me: hearing songs and being able to relate them to us..looking at pictures of how cute of a boyfriend i have..to laugh and smile and cry happy tears when i think about EVERYTHING we have done together in just the 5 MONTHS we were together..being able to go out of the state with you
me: ..to go to sleep and look across the way at the poster you made me and all the flowers i have..to turn on my side and see all our pictures in frames on our desk..to think about all we shared..to think about all our dorky moments..to think that i might actually want to go golfing sometime..to have a ring that i think stands for love, that i never take off, kinda like a promise ring..to have a brand new watch that matches yours..to cuddle with my bear that says 'someone from wm college loves you' every night..to sleep with your sweatshirt on..
me: to remember how we got together..to remember that first day where you held my hand for like 2 seconds at that baseball game..our first date where i told my mom that is was NOT A DATE and you didnt like me like that :-)...to have you actually call me the next day..our first kiss which i told myself i wasnt gonna do..i told tammy i wasnt gonna kiss you till you asked me out to prove some point, but i gave in and it was cute and always in my mind..the way i felt that i loved you WAY before you said it..the way you were nervous to ask me out...the way you were nervous to say i love you..how you took care of me when i fainted..how you asked me to prom in front of my entire science class..how prom was amazing..how proud i was at your graduation and that you wanted to eat lunch with me after it...the 4th of july..
me: how we got so comfortable around each other..how you taught me to hold the clubs..how you took me to the water show..chocolate covered strawberries from both fairs..all our 'close calls' and late nights :-)...the drive ins...mini coopers..goobers for me and skittles for you...how we rented out hollywood video..how you never failed to hold my hand..or make me feel 'yours' anywhere..being touchy feely...all our scrub days...my random italian sodas..my bracelet...
me: how you went so well with my family..how respectable you are..dressing up in yours clothes..taking pictures..you swinging with me at sherwood..all the many walks at redondo..and at dash point...the days where there was nothing to do..all the trips to southcenter..and the forever rides back..how you let me save a country station in your car..how you let me listen to that station too..how you like 'a beautiful mess'..how you always played 'everything i do'...at prom when you didnt push me to drink or feel uncomfortable..at prom when you would lip sync the songs..dessert at applebees...mini gold at bullwinkles..pictures of us kissing..the bear i got you...
me: how we would never want to leave each other..how you would always ask 'do you want pillows and a blanket' when we watched movies..how we never really watched a full movie..how we pretended to our families that we watched the movies..your 'joe' boxers >which are sold at kmart, do you have a kmart there?<..your tummy..your kiss..your hug..how you said you want to cuddle..all the times we ate subway..your soccer games..your sexy throw-in, haha...how you are my first boyfriend and i couldnt have asked for a better guy...that you hate the lakers, hehe...
me: yikes! i typed a lot, and NO WHERE NEAR DONE!! but i gotta go do my hmwk and study for my tests
me: PLEASE READ WHAT I WROTE!!
me: save it and read it later if you have too
me: I LOVE YOU RYAN ANDREW DAVIS~!!
me: YOU ARE MY EVERYTHING PLUS SOME!
me: THOSE ARE EVERYTHING THAT MADE/MAKES ME HAPPY
me: bye ryan
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..he said he cried when he read that :)
yay!! i hope things get better <33
me: just to let you know..what makes me happy..is to be able to say that you are my boyfriend..that i am in love with you..and that you say you are in love with me..that i read your info and i know YOU wrote that..knowing i have someone to turn to when my life is hell >like right now..but i cant talk to you..< ..being able to brag about you, us..having my binder COVERED in pictures of us..having a countdown in my school calendar- i cross out a number each day..that homecoming worked out for US..that i get another dance picture with you..that we have made it a MoNTH since you left..that i never in my wildest dreams, wait..i did used to dream for this! to fall in love..to find my guy, the right guy..my wish-come-true, my ment-to-be..
Auto response from Ry: Studying....and going over flight op. stuff....leave a message...
me: hearing songs and being able to relate them to us..looking at pictures of how cute of a boyfriend i have..to laugh and smile and cry happy tears when i think about EVERYTHING we have done together in just the 5 MONTHS we were together..being able to go out of the state with you
me: ..to go to sleep and look across the way at the poster you made me and all the flowers i have..to turn on my side and see all our pictures in frames on our desk..to think about all we shared..to think about all our dorky moments..to think that i might actually want to go golfing sometime..to have a ring that i think stands for love, that i never take off, kinda like a promise ring..to have a brand new watch that matches yours..to cuddle with my bear that says 'someone from wm college loves you' every night..to sleep with your sweatshirt on..
me: to remember how we got together..to remember that first day where you held my hand for like 2 seconds at that baseball game..our first date where i told my mom that is was NOT A DATE and you didnt like me like that :-)...to have you actually call me the next day..our first kiss which i told myself i wasnt gonna do..i told tammy i wasnt gonna kiss you till you asked me out to prove some point, but i gave in and it was cute and always in my mind..the way i felt that i loved you WAY before you said it..the way you were nervous to ask me out...the way you were nervous to say i love you..how you took care of me when i fainted..how you asked me to prom in front of my entire science class..how prom was amazing..how proud i was at your graduation and that you wanted to eat lunch with me after it...the 4th of july..
me: how we got so comfortable around each other..how you taught me to hold the clubs..how you took me to the water show..chocolate covered strawberries from both fairs..all our 'close calls' and late nights :-)...the drive ins...mini coopers..goobers for me and skittles for you...how we rented out hollywood video..how you never failed to hold my hand..or make me feel 'yours' anywhere..being touchy feely...all our scrub days...my random italian sodas..my bracelet...
me: how you went so well with my family..how respectable you are..dressing up in yours clothes..taking pictures..you swinging with me at sherwood..all the many walks at redondo..and at dash point...the days where there was nothing to do..all the trips to southcenter..and the forever rides back..how you let me save a country station in your car..how you let me listen to that station too..how you like 'a beautiful mess'..how you always played 'everything i do'...at prom when you didnt push me to drink or feel uncomfortable..at prom when you would lip sync the songs..dessert at applebees...mini gold at bullwinkles..pictures of us kissing..the bear i got you...
me: how we would never want to leave each other..how you would always ask 'do you want pillows and a blanket' when we watched movies..how we never really watched a full movie..how we pretended to our families that we watched the movies..your 'joe' boxers >which are sold at kmart, do you have a kmart there?<..your tummy..your kiss..your hug..how you said you want to cuddle..all the times we ate subway..your soccer games..your sexy throw-in, haha...how you are my first boyfriend and i couldnt have asked for a better guy...that you hate the lakers, hehe...
me: yikes! i typed a lot, and NO WHERE NEAR DONE!! but i gotta go do my hmwk and study for my tests
me: PLEASE READ WHAT I WROTE!!
me: save it and read it later if you have too
me: I LOVE YOU RYAN ANDREW DAVIS~!!
me: YOU ARE MY EVERYTHING PLUS SOME!
me: THOSE ARE EVERYTHING THAT MADE/MAKES ME HAPPY
me: bye ryan
--------------------------
..he said he cried when he read that :)
yay!! i hope things get better <33