(no subject)
I feel.. old. I want ten years of my life back. I want to re-make choices. I want to go back and tell myself that there was never anything worth being so hard and unforgiving of myself for, nothing so bad that I needed to undermine my future self with such painful self-loathing. I want to stop feeling as if I'm on the verge of turning 80 rather than 36. I want to stop being consumed by regrets about the what-was and the what-was-not.
But it doesn't work that way.
...
I think I feel like watching Donnie Darko again. This isn't actually as random as it seems - in the interest of not listening to the same thing over and over again, I've been pulling out some old random CDs. This week, timed so aptly to go with my aging feelings, I pulled out Depeche Mode and .. -cough- Duran Duran. (Shush! I am totally a child of the 80s.) Listening to Save a Prayer totally makes me feel like I'm in grade 5 or 6 or whatever year that was.. it's funny how some music reminds me of a time, and some music makes me feel like I'm actually there again. Notorious is on the same best-of CD.. and that's the song that Donnie's little sister's dance troupe has their routine set to in the movie. See? Not so random, just a bit circuitous.
Alright, enough procrastination.
But it doesn't work that way.
...
I think I feel like watching Donnie Darko again. This isn't actually as random as it seems - in the interest of not listening to the same thing over and over again, I've been pulling out some old random CDs. This week, timed so aptly to go with my aging feelings, I pulled out Depeche Mode and .. -cough- Duran Duran. (Shush! I am totally a child of the 80s.) Listening to Save a Prayer totally makes me feel like I'm in grade 5 or 6 or whatever year that was.. it's funny how some music reminds me of a time, and some music makes me feel like I'm actually there again. Notorious is on the same best-of CD.. and that's the song that Donnie's little sister's dance troupe has their routine set to in the movie. See? Not so random, just a bit circuitous.
Alright, enough procrastination.