oh god oh god oh god
his name is stephen. i went out with him a couple of times a few years back but threw a strop when he told me that he'd not mentioned the fact that he had a daughter. it wasn't the daughter that was a problem, but the fact that he'd not been honest about her. and then he stood me up. so i didn't see him again. And he chooses today to msn me. eeeek.
Newsflash. This man is fucking GORGEOUS. 6 foot 4 and broad and strong. And we got on really really well although we never got further than a snog.
So this leads to a problem.
I want to see him again and agree to a date when he asks, but what do i tell him about my peronal life? Do i just casually mention 'oh yeah, by the way, i really like to be flogged and have electricity applied to me until i squirm'? Because i can't exactly not mention it, can i? not after the whole 'daughter' episode and the 'you should have been honest from the start'. So i decide to bite the bullet and let him know that i'll need to talk to him about something, but i want to do it face to face, not online.
Yeah, what a doughnut i am. Because now the poor sod is on broken glass wondering what the hell i need to discuss with him. He asks if it's about not mentioning nicole (little girl) and i reassure him it's not. Then i tell him not to worry - i've not had a sex change or grown a beard or anything. finally i say okay - if you want to know now, give me a call. Thirty seconds later, the phone rings.
After a couple of friendly hellos, it's time to get down to business.
'Have you ever heard the initials BDSM?' i ask.
'er...Yes' he replies.
'That's interesting. In what context?'
'Erm, well...how can i say this - it was kind of kinky?..' the poor guy.
And so my confession began. I'm still not sure he understands entirely, but he certainly hasn't run screaming into the night and is still up for our date on Saturday. He also knows that it isn't about random sex and i don't go round shagging anything that moves - and by extrapolation, i hope, that i won't be leaping into bed with him.
Now to the real problem. What the frigging HELL am i going to wear???!!!!
As to my 'Mood' thingy - god knows - i'm still blushing from a combination of being asked out, immensely flattered, and explaining BDSM to a nilla that i fancy the pants off. I'm excited, giddy, tired, and 'o god got work tomorrow'. i don't think there is one for that!!!
I'll keep you posted
xxx