PERMISSION TO FREAK OUT!!!!!!!!!
THERE'S TOO MUCH TO DO! too many people to see, too many things that i need to do, im exhausting myself, im going to have a crazy stressful breakdown, and then ill lose total control, and just think everything is funny.
....seriously. my #1 worry is that it all won't fit into my 2 small bags. what on earth am i going to do. what am i going to do? leave things AT HOME!??!?!?! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! THEN I WON'T BE PREPARED FOR THINGS THAT I NEED TO BE PREPARED FOR! WHAT DO I DO? I CAN'T LIVE IN JUST A FEW PAIRS OF PANTS AND LIKE, 4 T-SHIRTS FOR 3 MONTHS!!!
i mean, it's not that im high maintenance or anything, i did just fine living out of 3 bags last semestre... BUT OH MY! SERIOUSLY! my big backpack is just not going to fit everything! plus i have my mom with her crazy herbs that shes putting in baggies for me, and they're GOING TO TAKE UP SO MUCH ROOM!!!
WHAT DO I DO??!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
maybe i'm not fit for going to far away countries, third world countries. im just, i don't know!!! there's too much i have to prepare for! WORST CASE SCENARIO THINGS!!!!!!!!
I JUST DON'T KNOW HOW TO PACK LIGHT! and like... IM LOSING CONTROL!
and i think that's one of the things that i can't do. I CAN'T LOSE CONTROL OF MY LIFE, AND MY SITUATIONS, AND things like that. i'm a control freak, and i just.... can't do this... what if this, what if that, what if i'm not prepared....
things ARE going to be out of my control, and they actually say that a stage of culture shock is "humour stage: the acceptance of losing control, and thinking everything is funny"... and i just think, man.... no. i won't be able to accept losing control, and ill have some kind of breakdown.
i dunno man, im just EXTREMELY stressed out right now, and should listen to people who say to just go with things, to calm down, if you lose control or aren't prepared for things, then whatever, that's how life is.
they just don't realize that i can't accept this.
tomorrow will be the real day that i freak out though. im going to PACK tomorrow, and if everything doesn't fit.... im not sure what ill do. i honestly can't pack CRAP ALL in my big backpack, because although it looks big, its REALLY REALLY not.
ill probably freak out more than i am right now. perhaps sneak things in my rain jacket, wear all my clothes at once, etc. i dunno...
oh dear. ill just have to see.. and be creative.
....seriously. my #1 worry is that it all won't fit into my 2 small bags. what on earth am i going to do. what am i going to do? leave things AT HOME!??!?!?! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!! THEN I WON'T BE PREPARED FOR THINGS THAT I NEED TO BE PREPARED FOR! WHAT DO I DO? I CAN'T LIVE IN JUST A FEW PAIRS OF PANTS AND LIKE, 4 T-SHIRTS FOR 3 MONTHS!!!
i mean, it's not that im high maintenance or anything, i did just fine living out of 3 bags last semestre... BUT OH MY! SERIOUSLY! my big backpack is just not going to fit everything! plus i have my mom with her crazy herbs that shes putting in baggies for me, and they're GOING TO TAKE UP SO MUCH ROOM!!!
WHAT DO I DO??!?!?!??!?!?!?!?!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
maybe i'm not fit for going to far away countries, third world countries. im just, i don't know!!! there's too much i have to prepare for! WORST CASE SCENARIO THINGS!!!!!!!!
I JUST DON'T KNOW HOW TO PACK LIGHT! and like... IM LOSING CONTROL!
and i think that's one of the things that i can't do. I CAN'T LOSE CONTROL OF MY LIFE, AND MY SITUATIONS, AND things like that. i'm a control freak, and i just.... can't do this... what if this, what if that, what if i'm not prepared....
things ARE going to be out of my control, and they actually say that a stage of culture shock is "humour stage: the acceptance of losing control, and thinking everything is funny"... and i just think, man.... no. i won't be able to accept losing control, and ill have some kind of breakdown.
i dunno man, im just EXTREMELY stressed out right now, and should listen to people who say to just go with things, to calm down, if you lose control or aren't prepared for things, then whatever, that's how life is.
they just don't realize that i can't accept this.
tomorrow will be the real day that i freak out though. im going to PACK tomorrow, and if everything doesn't fit.... im not sure what ill do. i honestly can't pack CRAP ALL in my big backpack, because although it looks big, its REALLY REALLY not.
ill probably freak out more than i am right now. perhaps sneak things in my rain jacket, wear all my clothes at once, etc. i dunno...
oh dear. ill just have to see.. and be creative.