Private.
The words stung like crazy, though I'd hate to admit.
I realize now, that I didn't exactly say there's no chance between us what-so-ever.
Though I'm afraid that's how she's percieved it,
but at this point I feel it's impossible for us to get back.
...I...needed time if anything.
I really needed time.
...and how is a person to believe anyone,
when they hear you're special a minute,
then followed up by, Oh, I kissed another guy, and he isn't interested in dating me at this point.
...Anyone would feel like you're the safe choice.
The last resort.
...Being sick, and having cold...feeling the nausea...
Sadly it just gave me time to reflect more on the issue.
......I... don't hate her. I never can. I never will.
I'm just hurt.
Why can't she understand I needed space?
...Now that I've clear head and mind, things are falling into places.
Perhaps I should've bitten my teeth and beared it, accepted her just, but I guess I am not as kind as I'd hoped.
... I need a time out.
...I... don't know how Yagami san's dealing with this.
She was so kind despite my being awkward.
Though, the implications seriously hurt.
...I... can't move on that fast.
...I really shouldn't think about that the next time I see Yagami san.
Otherwise, I'd surely get awkward.
I realize now, that I didn't exactly say there's no chance between us what-so-ever.
Though I'm afraid that's how she's percieved it,
but at this point I feel it's impossible for us to get back.
...I...needed time if anything.
I really needed time.
...and how is a person to believe anyone,
when they hear you're special a minute,
then followed up by, Oh, I kissed another guy, and he isn't interested in dating me at this point.
...Anyone would feel like you're the safe choice.
The last resort.
...Being sick, and having cold...feeling the nausea...
Sadly it just gave me time to reflect more on the issue.
......I... don't hate her. I never can. I never will.
I'm just hurt.
Why can't she understand I needed space?
...Now that I've clear head and mind, things are falling into places.
Perhaps I should've bitten my teeth and beared it, accepted her just, but I guess I am not as kind as I'd hoped.
... I need a time out.
...I... don't know how Yagami san's dealing with this.
She was so kind despite my being awkward.
Though, the implications seriously hurt.
...I... can't move on that fast.
...I really shouldn't think about that the next time I see Yagami san.
Otherwise, I'd surely get awkward.