Stolen Moments
The household is asleep. My tea is cooling. I don't know how long I have before my rambunctious 3 year old wakes up and starts pulling me in 20 different directions.
I found my old writing, from high school and college, back when I had the freedom to play with my creativity and characters. That portion of my brain feels like it's rusted with disuse.
I want to find a new outlet, a new generator for my creativity if I can find the moments to dive back into that world. I must find them.
I feel like I'm going crazy. Isolated in a work-from-home job that used to challenge me and now is just the same cycle over and over. Taunted by the never-ending jobs of laundry, dishes, and housekeeping tasks that never seem to get done.
Trapped by the schedule of responsibilities and crazy traffic patterns of this city that I somehow found myself in over 10 years ago.
Feeling stuck.
... I doubt anyone but me will read this. I crave community. Friendship.
Someone to communicate with that understands. Even the communication skills are getting rusty as most of my time is spent at home, alone with my Excel spreadsheets.
Can anyone else relate?
A dream world: I could work part-time using my creativity and then thrive as a mom and .. woman, I guess. A human with connections. With meaning in my life.
It feels like that dream is fading quickly with the rise of AI. And the daunting challenges of starting over, starting something completely different than the comfortable pattern of the office job I've held about 11 years.
A job that does provide well for my family. Leaving it would mean losing a good income stream and benefits. And a small group of people who are like family.