FIC (Supernatural): The Cool Kids' Table
Title: The Cool Kids' Table
Author: blue_fjords
Rating: PG-ish
Characters/Pairings: Dean/Castiel, Sam, Crowley, Gabriel, Kali
Word count" ~1900
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Warning/Spoilers: Set post-5x22.
A/N: For the lovely and amazing qthelights -- happy birthday! It's the 19th where you are. :)
Summary: Sam joins an exclusive club, and Dean and Cas come to a realization.
Eternity goes down smoother with Dr. Pepper, Sam thought, taking a sip through his straw. Across the table, Gabriel frowned at his own soda.
What was wrong with Mr. Pibb? Mr. Pibb was a perfectly fine name. It had class. Pibb Xtra isn’t even spelled right. Gabriel concentrated for a moment, his tongue poking out of the corner of his mouth, and his soda subtly changed. Welcome back, Mr. Pibb!
“A camping site? New Boy chose, didn’t he? Why does he get to choose?” Crowley frowned at the bucolic setting. “It smells like nature here,” he muttered. Something squelched under his foot as he walked to the picnic table. “I just stepped in nature.” He very gingerly slid onto the wooden bench next to Sam. “If I get splinters in my arse, you’re going to have to pick them out.”
“Don’t scare away the New Boy,” a woman’s voice said, and suddenly Kali was on the bench across from the demon. “We want him to stay; he’s much prettier than you.”
Sam turned a little pink. Gabriel cleared his throat and gave Kali a sideways glance.
“Let’s get this party started, shall we?” he asked, and continued right ahead. “Sam here chose the location, I provided drinks, and Kali? You brought snacks?”
She snapped her fingers, and the air was suddenly filled with the aroma of Arby’s curly fries. Crowley wrinkled his nose as Sam and Gabriel dug in.
“Really? Curly fries? Does someone want to explain to me why she’s invited here?” he said angrily. “She’s a goddess! That doesn’t fit our worldview at all! Where does she fit with angels and demons, yeah? And whatever the hell you are.” He poked Sam hard in the shoulder and frowned as his finger made not a dent. “She can’t even bring proper chips.”
Sam opened his mouth to come to her defense, but Kali reached across the table and laid a hand on his arm, her fingers gently brushing his wrist. “Don’t worry about it, Sam. We’ve been having this argument for centuries. He’s just embarrassed because he provided such bad entertainment last time.”
“Come on, Kali,” Gabriel said around a mouthful of curly fries, “you can’t pretend you weren’t turned on by watching Bobby Singer change a tire.”
“Wait, what?” Sam turned on the bench to face Crowley, Kali reluctantly releasing her hold. “You were spying on Bobby?”
“Ahhhhh.” Crowley pulled at his collar. “Just keeping an eye on my investment.”
“Your investment?” Sam narrowed his eyes, unconsciously tightening his grip on his Dr. Pepper. “You were to give him his soul back!”
“I am! I am! I’m just keeping it safe for him! Who knows what kind of demon strumpet would finagle a kiss out of the old sod?”
Sam growled low in his throat.
“Gentlemen! That’s enough. Crowley, this isn’t the type of entertainment you were meant to provide,” Kali interrupted.
“I don’t know; I’m amused,” Gabriel chimed in, reaching for his Mr. Pibb. Mr. Pibb, Mr. Pibb!
Kali rolled her eyes. “Open the portal, Crowley.”
Crowley grumbled underneath his breath, but pushed aside Arby’s bags and soda cups to lay his hand flat in the center of the picnic table. Sam gave him one more frown before leaning forward. Across the table, Kali rested her head on Gabriel’s shoulder.
The center of the wooden table became cloudy, then cleared. They were looking into the interior of the Impala. Sam blinked away wetness from the corners of his eyes.
“Beats standing like a creeper outside his window, yeah?” Crowley whispered to him. Sam ignored him.
“Does this thing get sound?” he asked.
The campsite was suddenly flooded with “Take my hand, we’ll make it I swe-ar! Whoa-oh! Livin’ on a pray-er!”
Sam’s jaw dropped open.
“What the fuck?” Dean muttered, tapping the radio.
Sam looked over at Gabriel. He was trying very hard not to laugh. Sam kicked him in the shin. “Fix it, Gabriel.”
Bon Jovi changed seamlessly into AC/DC, and Dean, down in the Impala, leaned back in the driver’s seat. Sam drank it all in: the open window, the music cranked loud, wind and sun streaming through the car. Dean looked . . . well, not very happy, truth be told, but alive.
“This is very boring,” Crowley hissed. “Come on, wouldn’t you lot prefer to be watching an old man change a tire?”
“Hush!” Kali whispered back. “Look!”
One second Dean was driving along by himself, and the next a very familiar figure in a tan trench coat was sitting in the passenger seat. Dean didn’t even swerve off the road.
“Mad props for how he handles the wheel,” Gabriel said quietly. “But what’s my brother doing there?”
“Couldn’t stay away, could you?” Dean asked, his tone biting.
“I told Sam I would look out for you,” Castiel replied calmly, his gaze traveling out the window, then roaming over the interior of the car, and finally settling on Dean.
“Aw, he’s sweet on him!” Gabriel kicked Sam’s shin this time. “Did you know that?”
“Ow! Be quiet, I want to hear!” Sam kicked him back.
“Well, here I am!” Dean said through gritted teeth. “I’ve got Ben’s soccer cleats in the trunk, a list of shit to get at the store for Lisa and I’m driving my baby through suburbia. I’m most definitely not trying to get Sam back. I’m sure he’d be pleased as punch.”
“Actually, you look like a constipated badger,” Crowley remarked, looking up from the table to purse his lips at Sam. “I think it’s partly the hair.”
“Shut up, all of you!” Sam hissed, glaring at Crowley for good measure. I really should have got my hair cut before I died.
“Sam may have wanted you to live a normal life, Dean, but I believe he would also like for you to have some semblance of happiness,” Castiel said, ignoring Dean’s foul temper. “Is there nothing in your life that brings you joy?”
Dean looked out the windshield, then shot Castiel a surreptitious look out of the corner of his eye. “Dude, will you quit staring at me?”
“I’m sorry. There’s nothing else I want to see.”
“Oh, I’m swooning!” Gabriel squealed, and clutched Kali’s hand. “Who knew my brother was such a sweet talker?”
“I think he’s just speaking the unvarnished truth,” Kali said, and leaned forward more, her lips parting slightly in anticipation of Dean’s response.
“You can’t say shit like that.” Dean jerked his own eyes away from the angel. “I’m . . . you just can’t say shit like that.”
Castiel’s brow wrinkled in confusion. “I’m sorry. I never got a handle on lying.”
“I could have taught him a thing or two,” Crowley muttered, reaching absently for a curly fry and taking a bite. Gabriel crowed with delight at the astonished look on his face. “Bloody hell! These are good!”
“Not much practice up in Heaven?” Dean asked. “Because I have met some of your family, and I think you stick to a stricter code of conduct there, buddy.”
“Hey!” Gabriel squawked.
“Nonsense, he’s right,” Kali informed him. “Hush.”
Castiel frowned. “Well. In the past we may have . . . taken certain liberties with the truth. I am trying to change that.”
“How’s that going for you?”
Castiel didn’t say anything.
“Cas?” Dean glanced over at him. “Hey, you okay?”
“I believe I am lonely.” Castiel folded his hands in his lap. “It is not a side effect I was expecting.”
Sam’s face softened, and he inadvertently reached a hand out before remembering he was looking through a picnic table. Next to him, Crowley coughed “wanker” into his hand.
“It’s - I was going to say ‘it’s not so bad,’ but it is, huh?” Dean looked at the steering wheel. “I like hanging out with Lisa and Ben. I even think, you know, they would let me be part of their family. It’s just . . .”
“It’s just WHAT?” Gabriel cried, leaning so far forward his nose nearly touched wood.
“You already have a family,” Castiel supplied.
“Yeah,” Dean sighed.
“And it’s not them.”
“Yeah.”
“Your brothers are both idiots. And Dean’s going to crash that car if they keep staring at each other like that.”
“Shut up, Crowley,” Sam, Gabriel and Kali all said in unison.
“You . . . you know you’re part of my family, right?” Dean asked, breaking eye contact to look out the windshield once more.
Crowley refrained from rolling his eyes with a massive effort.
“I . . . thank you, Dean.”
“No problem,” Dean said gruffly. “You could stand to visit more often, you know.”
“I will,” Castiel promised.
Dean pulled into a parking lot and cut the engine. Silence descended on the car as the occupants of the picnic table held their collective breaths. Finally, Castiel leaned slightly forward.
“Holy Dad, I think he’s going to kiss him,” Gabriel breathed. Sam’s eyes widened as Dean also moved imperceptibly closer. Crowley perked up, his eyes alighting with interest.
But Castiel wasn’t going for a kiss. His lips hovered by Dean’s ear, his voice pitched so low that no one at the table could hear.
“Quick, quick, turn up the volume!” Sam begged. The creak of leather as Castiel leaned back sounded like a thunder clap in the clearing. All four of them covered their ears.
“Turn it back down!” Sam bellowed. Another thunder clap issued when Dean leaned across the seat, followed by a smack that sounded like a ton of fish hitting a dock, but was, in fact, Dean’s lips on Castiel’s. Sam’s mouth fell open, his arms dropping uselessly to his sides, as the noise from a small waterfall (a slurp) and the rumble of a pride of lions (a moan) filled the clearing.
All noise abruptly cut out.
“I hit the mute button,” Kali said. “Well. That was certainly better than last week.”
Gabriel was still looking down through the portal. “I really should have taught Castiel how to kiss. His technique was rather sloppy.”
“Dean-o didn’t seem to mind,” Crowley huffed.
“Let’s leave them a little privacy,” Sam said firmly. He took one last look down through the portal. Dean and Castiel were sitting side by side, no longer kissing. He wondered what they were talking about, what choices Dean would make now. He’d look forward to watching.
The four of them stood up to leave, Sam not bothering to hide the silly grin on his face.
“I take it New Boy here will be joining us again next week?” Crowley groused, brushing off his coat and eyeing the litter on the table for any errant curly fries.
“Same bad time, same bad channel,” Gabriel said, eyes twinkling. Crowley rolled his eyes.
“Honestly, Kali, what do you see in this tosser?” he asked, turning to the goddess.
“Honestly? His shtick amuses me,” she said with a slight smile, and snapped her fingers to clean up the mess of cold fries (only three), wrappers and soda cups.
“My shtick,” Gabriel mouthed to Sam, and winked broadly. Sam shook his head, an exasperated smile on his face, and shoved his hands in his pockets. “Thanks, everyone, for inviting me along.”
“Hey, it was fun!” Gabriel reached over and mock-punched him in the shoulder. “And, at the rate my brother is moving, I have high hopes for angel-on-man porn for next week’s entertainment!”
Author: blue_fjords
Rating: PG-ish
Characters/Pairings: Dean/Castiel, Sam, Crowley, Gabriel, Kali
Word count" ~1900
Disclaimer: I own nothing.
Warning/Spoilers: Set post-5x22.
A/N: For the lovely and amazing qthelights -- happy birthday! It's the 19th where you are. :)
Summary: Sam joins an exclusive club, and Dean and Cas come to a realization.
Eternity goes down smoother with Dr. Pepper, Sam thought, taking a sip through his straw. Across the table, Gabriel frowned at his own soda.
What was wrong with Mr. Pibb? Mr. Pibb was a perfectly fine name. It had class. Pibb Xtra isn’t even spelled right. Gabriel concentrated for a moment, his tongue poking out of the corner of his mouth, and his soda subtly changed. Welcome back, Mr. Pibb!
“A camping site? New Boy chose, didn’t he? Why does he get to choose?” Crowley frowned at the bucolic setting. “It smells like nature here,” he muttered. Something squelched under his foot as he walked to the picnic table. “I just stepped in nature.” He very gingerly slid onto the wooden bench next to Sam. “If I get splinters in my arse, you’re going to have to pick them out.”
“Don’t scare away the New Boy,” a woman’s voice said, and suddenly Kali was on the bench across from the demon. “We want him to stay; he’s much prettier than you.”
Sam turned a little pink. Gabriel cleared his throat and gave Kali a sideways glance.
“Let’s get this party started, shall we?” he asked, and continued right ahead. “Sam here chose the location, I provided drinks, and Kali? You brought snacks?”
She snapped her fingers, and the air was suddenly filled with the aroma of Arby’s curly fries. Crowley wrinkled his nose as Sam and Gabriel dug in.
“Really? Curly fries? Does someone want to explain to me why she’s invited here?” he said angrily. “She’s a goddess! That doesn’t fit our worldview at all! Where does she fit with angels and demons, yeah? And whatever the hell you are.” He poked Sam hard in the shoulder and frowned as his finger made not a dent. “She can’t even bring proper chips.”
Sam opened his mouth to come to her defense, but Kali reached across the table and laid a hand on his arm, her fingers gently brushing his wrist. “Don’t worry about it, Sam. We’ve been having this argument for centuries. He’s just embarrassed because he provided such bad entertainment last time.”
“Come on, Kali,” Gabriel said around a mouthful of curly fries, “you can’t pretend you weren’t turned on by watching Bobby Singer change a tire.”
“Wait, what?” Sam turned on the bench to face Crowley, Kali reluctantly releasing her hold. “You were spying on Bobby?”
“Ahhhhh.” Crowley pulled at his collar. “Just keeping an eye on my investment.”
“Your investment?” Sam narrowed his eyes, unconsciously tightening his grip on his Dr. Pepper. “You were to give him his soul back!”
“I am! I am! I’m just keeping it safe for him! Who knows what kind of demon strumpet would finagle a kiss out of the old sod?”
Sam growled low in his throat.
“Gentlemen! That’s enough. Crowley, this isn’t the type of entertainment you were meant to provide,” Kali interrupted.
“I don’t know; I’m amused,” Gabriel chimed in, reaching for his Mr. Pibb. Mr. Pibb, Mr. Pibb!
Kali rolled her eyes. “Open the portal, Crowley.”
Crowley grumbled underneath his breath, but pushed aside Arby’s bags and soda cups to lay his hand flat in the center of the picnic table. Sam gave him one more frown before leaning forward. Across the table, Kali rested her head on Gabriel’s shoulder.
The center of the wooden table became cloudy, then cleared. They were looking into the interior of the Impala. Sam blinked away wetness from the corners of his eyes.
“Beats standing like a creeper outside his window, yeah?” Crowley whispered to him. Sam ignored him.
“Does this thing get sound?” he asked.
The campsite was suddenly flooded with “Take my hand, we’ll make it I swe-ar! Whoa-oh! Livin’ on a pray-er!”
Sam’s jaw dropped open.
“What the fuck?” Dean muttered, tapping the radio.
Sam looked over at Gabriel. He was trying very hard not to laugh. Sam kicked him in the shin. “Fix it, Gabriel.”
Bon Jovi changed seamlessly into AC/DC, and Dean, down in the Impala, leaned back in the driver’s seat. Sam drank it all in: the open window, the music cranked loud, wind and sun streaming through the car. Dean looked . . . well, not very happy, truth be told, but alive.
“This is very boring,” Crowley hissed. “Come on, wouldn’t you lot prefer to be watching an old man change a tire?”
“Hush!” Kali whispered back. “Look!”
One second Dean was driving along by himself, and the next a very familiar figure in a tan trench coat was sitting in the passenger seat. Dean didn’t even swerve off the road.
“Mad props for how he handles the wheel,” Gabriel said quietly. “But what’s my brother doing there?”
“Couldn’t stay away, could you?” Dean asked, his tone biting.
“I told Sam I would look out for you,” Castiel replied calmly, his gaze traveling out the window, then roaming over the interior of the car, and finally settling on Dean.
“Aw, he’s sweet on him!” Gabriel kicked Sam’s shin this time. “Did you know that?”
“Ow! Be quiet, I want to hear!” Sam kicked him back.
“Well, here I am!” Dean said through gritted teeth. “I’ve got Ben’s soccer cleats in the trunk, a list of shit to get at the store for Lisa and I’m driving my baby through suburbia. I’m most definitely not trying to get Sam back. I’m sure he’d be pleased as punch.”
“Actually, you look like a constipated badger,” Crowley remarked, looking up from the table to purse his lips at Sam. “I think it’s partly the hair.”
“Shut up, all of you!” Sam hissed, glaring at Crowley for good measure. I really should have got my hair cut before I died.
“Sam may have wanted you to live a normal life, Dean, but I believe he would also like for you to have some semblance of happiness,” Castiel said, ignoring Dean’s foul temper. “Is there nothing in your life that brings you joy?”
Dean looked out the windshield, then shot Castiel a surreptitious look out of the corner of his eye. “Dude, will you quit staring at me?”
“I’m sorry. There’s nothing else I want to see.”
“Oh, I’m swooning!” Gabriel squealed, and clutched Kali’s hand. “Who knew my brother was such a sweet talker?”
“I think he’s just speaking the unvarnished truth,” Kali said, and leaned forward more, her lips parting slightly in anticipation of Dean’s response.
“You can’t say shit like that.” Dean jerked his own eyes away from the angel. “I’m . . . you just can’t say shit like that.”
Castiel’s brow wrinkled in confusion. “I’m sorry. I never got a handle on lying.”
“I could have taught him a thing or two,” Crowley muttered, reaching absently for a curly fry and taking a bite. Gabriel crowed with delight at the astonished look on his face. “Bloody hell! These are good!”
“Not much practice up in Heaven?” Dean asked. “Because I have met some of your family, and I think you stick to a stricter code of conduct there, buddy.”
“Hey!” Gabriel squawked.
“Nonsense, he’s right,” Kali informed him. “Hush.”
Castiel frowned. “Well. In the past we may have . . . taken certain liberties with the truth. I am trying to change that.”
“How’s that going for you?”
Castiel didn’t say anything.
“Cas?” Dean glanced over at him. “Hey, you okay?”
“I believe I am lonely.” Castiel folded his hands in his lap. “It is not a side effect I was expecting.”
Sam’s face softened, and he inadvertently reached a hand out before remembering he was looking through a picnic table. Next to him, Crowley coughed “wanker” into his hand.
“It’s - I was going to say ‘it’s not so bad,’ but it is, huh?” Dean looked at the steering wheel. “I like hanging out with Lisa and Ben. I even think, you know, they would let me be part of their family. It’s just . . .”
“It’s just WHAT?” Gabriel cried, leaning so far forward his nose nearly touched wood.
“You already have a family,” Castiel supplied.
“Yeah,” Dean sighed.
“And it’s not them.”
“Yeah.”
“Your brothers are both idiots. And Dean’s going to crash that car if they keep staring at each other like that.”
“Shut up, Crowley,” Sam, Gabriel and Kali all said in unison.
“You . . . you know you’re part of my family, right?” Dean asked, breaking eye contact to look out the windshield once more.
Crowley refrained from rolling his eyes with a massive effort.
“I . . . thank you, Dean.”
“No problem,” Dean said gruffly. “You could stand to visit more often, you know.”
“I will,” Castiel promised.
Dean pulled into a parking lot and cut the engine. Silence descended on the car as the occupants of the picnic table held their collective breaths. Finally, Castiel leaned slightly forward.
“Holy Dad, I think he’s going to kiss him,” Gabriel breathed. Sam’s eyes widened as Dean also moved imperceptibly closer. Crowley perked up, his eyes alighting with interest.
But Castiel wasn’t going for a kiss. His lips hovered by Dean’s ear, his voice pitched so low that no one at the table could hear.
“Quick, quick, turn up the volume!” Sam begged. The creak of leather as Castiel leaned back sounded like a thunder clap in the clearing. All four of them covered their ears.
“Turn it back down!” Sam bellowed. Another thunder clap issued when Dean leaned across the seat, followed by a smack that sounded like a ton of fish hitting a dock, but was, in fact, Dean’s lips on Castiel’s. Sam’s mouth fell open, his arms dropping uselessly to his sides, as the noise from a small waterfall (a slurp) and the rumble of a pride of lions (a moan) filled the clearing.
All noise abruptly cut out.
“I hit the mute button,” Kali said. “Well. That was certainly better than last week.”
Gabriel was still looking down through the portal. “I really should have taught Castiel how to kiss. His technique was rather sloppy.”
“Dean-o didn’t seem to mind,” Crowley huffed.
“Let’s leave them a little privacy,” Sam said firmly. He took one last look down through the portal. Dean and Castiel were sitting side by side, no longer kissing. He wondered what they were talking about, what choices Dean would make now. He’d look forward to watching.
The four of them stood up to leave, Sam not bothering to hide the silly grin on his face.
“I take it New Boy here will be joining us again next week?” Crowley groused, brushing off his coat and eyeing the litter on the table for any errant curly fries.
“Same bad time, same bad channel,” Gabriel said, eyes twinkling. Crowley rolled his eyes.
“Honestly, Kali, what do you see in this tosser?” he asked, turning to the goddess.
“Honestly? His shtick amuses me,” she said with a slight smile, and snapped her fingers to clean up the mess of cold fries (only three), wrappers and soda cups.
“My shtick,” Gabriel mouthed to Sam, and winked broadly. Sam shook his head, an exasperated smile on his face, and shoved his hands in his pockets. “Thanks, everyone, for inviting me along.”
“Hey, it was fun!” Gabriel reached over and mock-punched him in the shoulder. “And, at the rate my brother is moving, I have high hopes for angel-on-man porn for next week’s entertainment!”