The land of If Only...

Jul 19, 2007 23:42

If only I was waking up to the life I had in my dream instead of a dorm room in the city. If only I was surrounded by the love of a husband and children. If only it was real.

It was a bright sunny day. The country really is the best place to raise children. I think this every time I see them playing outside. Today though, they've decided to put on a play for me. They work hard, and along with their father decide the play should be about a princess who has been kidnapped by an evil villain. The handsome young prince must come to her rescue. I stand in the doorway, watching as they put the finishing touches to their costumes. I snap pictures when they're not looking. It was easier when they were younger, but now, they run. I guess having a picture crazy father is too much for them.

The eldest, a boy tall for his age, looks up at me. I'm amazed every time I look at him. He has hair almost the exact shade of mine, but with his father's height. I think that one day, we should get his hair cut, but he looks so handsome that way, that I dont' want to change it. His eyes are unique; around the pupil is violet, almost resembling a ring of flames merging with blue. The purple of them is the exact shade as his father's, while the blue around the edges is the same as mine. Then he smiles, or if I could be so bold to say that he smirks. It's scary to see a child that age smirk, but it reminds me of his father, and how much I love him.

Our daughter though, is almost angelic. Petite for her age, she is the image of a princess. I raise my camera and snap a picture just as the light shines through the window, creating a halo. Darker, rich brown hair, halfway down her back, frames violet eyes, an exact copy of my husband's. They are beautiful, as is she. She runs up to me, asking for help with her dress. Kneeling, I tie the bow at her back. I look up and catch the eyes of my beloved. We have gone past the point of needed to vocalize how we feel. A mere look reminds me that he loves me as much as I love him.  Liking the image of him with that fake moustache, I pick up my camera and snap a picture.

I remember the day she was born, thinking our family was complete. We had two beautiful children, our house in the country. I had my teaching, he had his writing. and we had each other. I was loved, and loved them in return. I was proven wrong though, but the little person with a healthy set of lungs upstairs. Offering to put the baby down for his nap, I watch as the man I love more than life runs out of the room. I can hear humming, and know when he's calmed enough because I hear the strains of a familiar lullaby from my husband's violin. I think of the two of them up there, and I cannot help but smile. That baby is a blend of us. He has my husband's hair, dark and silky. His eyes though, are the image of mine. Holding him, staring into his eyes, it's like looking into my own. We were blessed, truly blessed. I wouldn't change any of it.

I'm brought out of these memories by a hand on my shoulder. Our son wants to get the play started, and I can tell our daughter thinks the same. I can also tell she was the one that put him up to it. He'd never say no to her. I tell him to go upstairs to get his father, and he runs off. My little princess stands in front of me, telling me I should get ready. The show will start and I need to be in my seat. Laughing, I take her hand and let her lead me to the couch. I'm enchanted by how perfect our family is. I'm also highly amused because I married the villain who is now dying a spectacular death in front of me. I can't resist, and pick up the camera again to take a picture. This one will be framed.

I can't help but cheer, because they worked so hard and the show was amazing. Watching as my husband rises from the floor, I'm again taken aback by how handsome he is. For the hundreth time that day, I remind myself that I'm one of the luckiest people on the planet. Pealing his moustache off, he leans in, brushing his lips against mine. He tells me he loves me, says my name, which never fails to send shivers down my spine. I reach up, cup his cheek and whisper his name, followed by "I love you". I woke up with the memory of his smiling face.

I can only hope that my life is like that one day. 
I was loved, so loved that I can still feel it. 
I believe we can make that a reality one day.
Previous post Next post
Up