updates
The bad news:
After some months of trying to patch up our relationship, my wife left me on 4 May, the day before our 4th anniversary.
I've gone through my head over and over again for months as to why things fell apart, and what I could've done. None of the explanations are good. It all comes back to these basic observations:
1.) She and I were too different in what we wanted in life (she wanted to play forever, I wanted a family)
2.) She stopped loving and trusting me
3.) She was too screwed up to allow herself to grow up emotionally
Before anyone gives me guff on this sounding biased, these are all things she told me in our last ever face-to-face conversation. While we've had conversations via text message and even two phone calls. I haven't seen her since.
I'm now officially separated, looking to file for divorce. Unfortunately UK divorce law is not as easy as it is in the states.
There's more by the way. Her leaving me also came with a refusal to help me get my permanent visa. So, in spite of an effort with an immigration lawyer to extend my visa through other means, I had to leave the country when my visa expired. So I am now in the USA, trying to apply for a work visa under the government's new work visa program.
Needless to say, this has been hard on my company, and hard on myself.
The good news:
If all this hadn't happened, I wouldn't have met my girlfriend. She is a remarkable creature. A lovely Nereid of curly hair and spectacles. She is so much like me it's unnerving. Combining this with a wonderful demeanour at parties as well as explosive chemistry, and you have someone who is a joy to be around. I am working to get back to the UK for my job, but also for her.
After some months of trying to patch up our relationship, my wife left me on 4 May, the day before our 4th anniversary.
I've gone through my head over and over again for months as to why things fell apart, and what I could've done. None of the explanations are good. It all comes back to these basic observations:
1.) She and I were too different in what we wanted in life (she wanted to play forever, I wanted a family)
2.) She stopped loving and trusting me
3.) She was too screwed up to allow herself to grow up emotionally
Before anyone gives me guff on this sounding biased, these are all things she told me in our last ever face-to-face conversation. While we've had conversations via text message and even two phone calls. I haven't seen her since.
I'm now officially separated, looking to file for divorce. Unfortunately UK divorce law is not as easy as it is in the states.
There's more by the way. Her leaving me also came with a refusal to help me get my permanent visa. So, in spite of an effort with an immigration lawyer to extend my visa through other means, I had to leave the country when my visa expired. So I am now in the USA, trying to apply for a work visa under the government's new work visa program.
Needless to say, this has been hard on my company, and hard on myself.
The good news:
If all this hadn't happened, I wouldn't have met my girlfriend. She is a remarkable creature. A lovely Nereid of curly hair and spectacles. She is so much like me it's unnerving. Combining this with a wonderful demeanour at parties as well as explosive chemistry, and you have someone who is a joy to be around. I am working to get back to the UK for my job, but also for her.