"I'm so much better than I used to be."
Thinking back on the past few years, I realize how many people have entered in and exited my life. Most of those people I appreciate for at least one or two reasons, they taught me something about myself or about life in general. Sometimes, I learned about the kind of person I didn't want to be, or I could see something in the person that I wanted to look in the mirror and see in myself.
And the exits... yeah, well, some of them hurt. A lot. Some of them were just necessary, there wasn't any way that the person could possibly stay in my life any longer.
But, even when you know they have to go, it still hurts.
Others exited without a word. Simply just bailed ship. I learned to live without those people, but I can't say I always understood what happened or why it had to. I hurt for them... and then picked up and moved on, because it was obvious that I never meant much to them, since they left without saying a word.
The hardest part of all of this is learning to stand on my own two feet and not depend on others to explain to me who I am and what's important to me. I drifted for a long time along a path that never really reflected who I really am. I did a lot of things I'm not proud of. I said a lot of things that I wish I could take back.
But I feel like I have a fairly good grip on who I am and what I want. I'm really excited to be getting married and graduating from CMU and moving down a new path of my life. I'm ready for the next phase. I'm ready to get my masters and then start thinking about a family.
I guess... what I'm trying to say is... thank you. To everyone. Every single person that I've come in contact with has taught me at least one thing. While I don't drown myself in the memories of some of the darker stuff in my past, I do realize that I learned something in every moment, even if it was a hard lesson to learn.
And, if you were one of those people who left (whether you said goodbye or not), I hope your life is taking you somewhere great. I hope that your life is everything you wanted it to be. I hope that you're happy, truly and honestly.
God bless every single one of you.
*Shaelynn*
"I don't need your approval to find my worth... There goes my pain, there goes my chains. Did you see them falling?... There goes the world off of my shoulders, there goes the world off of my back. There it goes." - Lifehouse
And the exits... yeah, well, some of them hurt. A lot. Some of them were just necessary, there wasn't any way that the person could possibly stay in my life any longer.
But, even when you know they have to go, it still hurts.
Others exited without a word. Simply just bailed ship. I learned to live without those people, but I can't say I always understood what happened or why it had to. I hurt for them... and then picked up and moved on, because it was obvious that I never meant much to them, since they left without saying a word.
The hardest part of all of this is learning to stand on my own two feet and not depend on others to explain to me who I am and what's important to me. I drifted for a long time along a path that never really reflected who I really am. I did a lot of things I'm not proud of. I said a lot of things that I wish I could take back.
But I feel like I have a fairly good grip on who I am and what I want. I'm really excited to be getting married and graduating from CMU and moving down a new path of my life. I'm ready for the next phase. I'm ready to get my masters and then start thinking about a family.
I guess... what I'm trying to say is... thank you. To everyone. Every single person that I've come in contact with has taught me at least one thing. While I don't drown myself in the memories of some of the darker stuff in my past, I do realize that I learned something in every moment, even if it was a hard lesson to learn.
And, if you were one of those people who left (whether you said goodbye or not), I hope your life is taking you somewhere great. I hope that your life is everything you wanted it to be. I hope that you're happy, truly and honestly.
God bless every single one of you.
*Shaelynn*
"I don't need your approval to find my worth... There goes my pain, there goes my chains. Did you see them falling?... There goes the world off of my shoulders, there goes the world off of my back. There it goes." - Lifehouse