"You might lean toward the darker side."
Haven't done this in awhile, but it's getting close to exam time and I need some input on some of the poems that I'd like to include in my portfolio.
So... here they are:
*Any Random Day*
Wrapped up in the sunshine-warmth of my bedding,
I close my eyes, try to stop the morning from coming,
but it comes, despite my efforts. I am dreading
the chill of the floor on the soles of my feet and spreading
upwards to the goosebumps that are already rising,
so I vault myself up from the bed and, running,
I warm myself up in the steamy fog showering.
So warm, I nod off and sometime later, I am hurrying
to be ready in time for a day which is beginning
without me. I start my day helping, carrying, smiling,
and within some-odd hours I am rushing, rushing
to a class that will begin without me, professor speaking
and I nod in apology and then I am sitting, listening,
to words that don’t really seem to mean anything
to a half-asleep mind which is out the window dreaming
of sandy beaches, a good book, and maybe some swimming.
And, out of the daydream, class is rapidly finishing
and we are walking out, laughing, smiling, talking, wishing
that we had any sort of clue of what was just happening.
And I am in my sun-warmed car, windows down, driving
fast to your apartment and you are there waiting
with a smile and a kiss and an I love you, always romancing
me and my daydreams of our life together, constantly amazing
and we lay in front of the TV, comfortable and half-way sleeping,
and I am home in this place in your warm arms surrounding.
*Shattered Life*
I saw the world unclearly
through green eyes that merely
saw the worst in things.
I wanted to have faith
that a better time would come,
but no matter how hard I tried,
everything spun so far downwards.
My world shattered and I
lost sight of the things that matter.
I allowed my sadness to
swallow me whole.
I couldn’t find enough oxygen
to allow me to breathe in
what might have been
if I could have just been okay.
I couldn’t even make it through one day
without tears coursing down my face
in memory of things I couldn’t erase
from an over-analyzing mind.
Everything is shattered
and broken.
I have spoken
words that are hated,
but memories fade and
someday I will pick up the pieces
of the life I used to lead
and everything will be okay,
somehow, someday.
*music makes me think too much*
Words, rhythms, harmonies, melodies -
meant to keep us close to one another,
now driving me from any sort of
rapport with anyone around.
I keep my music close at hand, just
waiting for the moment when I
can turn it up and escape from all
that surrounds me.
It’s like my own black hole, pulling
me into the center of the songs I hear,
allowing me to forget about the reality
of this life that I lead outside these
headphones. I feel that the words
speak only to me, evolving inside
this grey matter into something so
frighteningly meaningful that I begin
to live the lyrics, singing them in my
own clear voice, personifying them
until I have truly become a part of it.
I’m just a note floating in the air with
a thousand other notes, all black. Alone,
we cannot be beautiful, but together -
together we are a symphony
just waiting to happen, true
potential lying just beneath the surface
of our paper faces.
And it is then that I realize that
this music, this resplendence of the
sound permeating my brain, is
allowing me to hide away inside
my own world.
But I cannot survive here.
So I share my discovery of these little
black notes floating through the air
and I smile - the music that once allowed
me to alienate myself has now
become my thread of convergence.
*Hysteria in a One-Stoplight Town*
And I’m trapped ~
snapped up
by the monotony
of this
small-town
mindset/action/lifestyle.
And I’m bored ~
whored out
by a familial
connection
to it all.
And I’m saddened ~
maddened
that this way of life
could, too easily,
become
normal/easy/wanted.
And I’m crying ~
dying inside
at the idea
of spending my
dream-filled destiny
here in this
one-stoplight town.
And I’m killing ~
spilling the blood
of every person
shaking their
finger and saying,
“That one -
she’s a car wreck
just waiting...”
Again, feedback would be greatly appreciated!!!
<3
Shaelynn
So... here they are:
*Any Random Day*
Wrapped up in the sunshine-warmth of my bedding,
I close my eyes, try to stop the morning from coming,
but it comes, despite my efforts. I am dreading
the chill of the floor on the soles of my feet and spreading
upwards to the goosebumps that are already rising,
so I vault myself up from the bed and, running,
I warm myself up in the steamy fog showering.
So warm, I nod off and sometime later, I am hurrying
to be ready in time for a day which is beginning
without me. I start my day helping, carrying, smiling,
and within some-odd hours I am rushing, rushing
to a class that will begin without me, professor speaking
and I nod in apology and then I am sitting, listening,
to words that don’t really seem to mean anything
to a half-asleep mind which is out the window dreaming
of sandy beaches, a good book, and maybe some swimming.
And, out of the daydream, class is rapidly finishing
and we are walking out, laughing, smiling, talking, wishing
that we had any sort of clue of what was just happening.
And I am in my sun-warmed car, windows down, driving
fast to your apartment and you are there waiting
with a smile and a kiss and an I love you, always romancing
me and my daydreams of our life together, constantly amazing
and we lay in front of the TV, comfortable and half-way sleeping,
and I am home in this place in your warm arms surrounding.
*Shattered Life*
I saw the world unclearly
through green eyes that merely
saw the worst in things.
I wanted to have faith
that a better time would come,
but no matter how hard I tried,
everything spun so far downwards.
My world shattered and I
lost sight of the things that matter.
I allowed my sadness to
swallow me whole.
I couldn’t find enough oxygen
to allow me to breathe in
what might have been
if I could have just been okay.
I couldn’t even make it through one day
without tears coursing down my face
in memory of things I couldn’t erase
from an over-analyzing mind.
Everything is shattered
and broken.
I have spoken
words that are hated,
but memories fade and
someday I will pick up the pieces
of the life I used to lead
and everything will be okay,
somehow, someday.
*music makes me think too much*
Words, rhythms, harmonies, melodies -
meant to keep us close to one another,
now driving me from any sort of
rapport with anyone around.
I keep my music close at hand, just
waiting for the moment when I
can turn it up and escape from all
that surrounds me.
It’s like my own black hole, pulling
me into the center of the songs I hear,
allowing me to forget about the reality
of this life that I lead outside these
headphones. I feel that the words
speak only to me, evolving inside
this grey matter into something so
frighteningly meaningful that I begin
to live the lyrics, singing them in my
own clear voice, personifying them
until I have truly become a part of it.
I’m just a note floating in the air with
a thousand other notes, all black. Alone,
we cannot be beautiful, but together -
together we are a symphony
just waiting to happen, true
potential lying just beneath the surface
of our paper faces.
And it is then that I realize that
this music, this resplendence of the
sound permeating my brain, is
allowing me to hide away inside
my own world.
But I cannot survive here.
So I share my discovery of these little
black notes floating through the air
and I smile - the music that once allowed
me to alienate myself has now
become my thread of convergence.
*Hysteria in a One-Stoplight Town*
And I’m trapped ~
snapped up
by the monotony
of this
small-town
mindset/action/lifestyle.
And I’m bored ~
whored out
by a familial
connection
to it all.
And I’m saddened ~
maddened
that this way of life
could, too easily,
become
normal/easy/wanted.
And I’m crying ~
dying inside
at the idea
of spending my
dream-filled destiny
here in this
one-stoplight town.
And I’m killing ~
spilling the blood
of every person
shaking their
finger and saying,
“That one -
she’s a car wreck
just waiting...”
Again, feedback would be greatly appreciated!!!
<3
Shaelynn