So...
I just got the email notification that I've had this account for 18 years. 18 long years: 2005 is when I started this account. I don't even remember who I was then. I know my last post kind of gave a idea of what happened to me in the last 14 years But that's not even half of it.
I ended up breaking up with Poss In 2010. Reasons were because he kept trying to say he wanted to marry me. He even bought an engagement ring which believe it or not infuriated me because he had no life goals. He kept trying to push marriage but he had no job no place of his own. He had no way of being a sustainable adult. What if we had a family? I couldn't rely on that. I wanted a future.
I ended up calling it off with him all together. But then Toole And I got to talking again.
If I'm being truly honest with myself, I've always known that I wanted to be with him anyway. He ended up flying out from California to meet me for the first time in North Carolina. Eventually he ended up moving to North Carolina to be with me. We got married in 2012 and in 2013 we bought our first home. We got a dog we named Patch and he is quite literally the best Pitbull you'll ever know. We've had some other dogs too but they didn't work out because...reasons.. But we bought a house, Toole (now the new Chris) got a job in management at Dollar Tree for a while. And we were doing really well there but when he found out that he was never going to get his own store in management, he decided to make a career change.
I was doing okay at Harris teeter for a few years but like most jobs, I got pigeon holed into a rut. I wasn't going anywhere with my job either. So my husband decided to take up truck driving. That first year was incredibly difficult. We had only been married for probably a year and a half or so when he started that career. He would be gone for 4 to 6 weeks at a time and I would only see him for about a week before he was gone again. That's probably the biggest struggle of my life not having him around. But I've always had Angie and my mom around. And Chris made some good friends while he was on the road too.
Eventually, when he got into his truck driving, his friend, Jon, offered him a job in Ohio to drive up to Canada. He would be driving from Columbus Ohio to Mississauga Ontario Canada every other day but he would be home much more often. After a year of him not being home as much as possible. I wanted that so bad. My family didn't want me to move from North Carolina but we knew there was no future in there for us. No career goals, nothing positive. It felt like everything was going backwards. So in 2016 we ended up moving to Ohio.
I into my first car accident and speeding ticket that year, not fun. But, ever since then, we've been much better. I did end up getting a job working at Dollar General for about 6 months. The manager they're absolutely loved me but I couldn't return the feeling. He was new to retail but he didn't want to listen to it suggestion when people offered it. I worked In retail for 12 years, not like I didn't know what I was doing.
Eventually I ended up leaving so that I could go on the road with Chris for a little while but I ended up looking for another job and it worked at public storage for about 7 or 8 months. It wasn't such a glamorous job. The pay was low, and it was incredibly boring and dangerous honestly. I hated being alone on a property at night because I knew that homeless people would hang out and storage units. I have nothing against homeless but some are dangerous And it's dangerous to be alone at night regardless of who you are.
I ended up leaving that job and I worked for a utility company in Columbus. I actually really love that job despite it being a temp job. I was there for almost 2 years where I actually felt like I was doing something I could be proud of. I made a friend there as well as public storage although I don't really see them all that much. Such as adult life. During that time, The pay was all right, but eventually I had to get a new job which sucks because I loved that one.
At the end of My time there , I got pregnant for the first time. It was short-lived. I ended up miscarrying at 6 weeks. It was probably one of the worst feelings I ever had experienced in my life. People kept saying that they were willing to talk to me but I didn't want to talk. My husband felt useless because he couldn't really console me. There was no consolation. I felt like my body was betraying me when I lost the baby. It was through no one's fault or anything like that but still, it felt that way. It was a very traumatic experience but I've made my peace with it now. That was in 2021, around September or August. By then I had been working with Forward air the company that contracts my husband now.
We had been trying for 6 years to conceive a baby by then, and I was ready to give up after the miscarriage and actually work with a fertility specialist to have a baby. The fertility specialist said that there really wasn't anything that was stopping me from having a baby but if necessary he would work with us. So I gave it a few more months and decided that at the start of 2022 I was going to go in hard with trying to have a baby. I was 34 by then and I was just tired of it.
November of that that year we got to go to Las Vegas. I forgot to mention that my brother moved away from North Carolina too and moved to Las Vegas with his son, yes my brother has a son. He's 10 years old now. He and his girlfriend (Not my nephew's mother) went on a cruise and we were just really overpaid babysitters.
When we got back, about a couple weeks later, I felt kind of funny and decided to check a pregnancy test again for whatever reason. This time I was pregnant pregnant. Everyone keeps saying that she was conceived in Vegas, she wasn't, I could pinpoint the exact day when she was 😂.
All the while, I was struggling at my new job at Forward Air. I felt like they never really trained me as well as they could have. There's a lot to learn and it's not that bad but when the workload is so overwhelming and you get dogged for asking for help even though they tell you to ask for help, it's just impossible. I ended up losing my job in March of last year because I kept making so many mistakes. It was overwhelming, everything was on a strict time constraint, but I was drowning in work. I don't miss that job, I don't even regret being fired for the first time ever in any of my jobs.
I've been a housewife since then. Although my pregnancy was very difficult. I was always sick and vomiting and lost a lot of weight during the process. But from the 6th week of my pregnancy onward, I could tell my baby was going to be strong and In March of last year we found out that we were having a baby girl.
The pictures I could tell you I've taken. Ever since she's been born, I've watched her grow and change. I ended up giving birth in August of 2022. And she is the perfect blend of me and her father.
We went through some struggles with her skin for a while. In fact I have a dermatologist appointment for her today, but now she's okay and healthy and happy and asleep in my lap.
And, well that's pretty much where we are today. I'm 36 years old, I'm a stay at home now, I've made some incredibly amazing and new friends especially my one from Canada. It's just been so much in such a long period of time and it's impossible to really go through all the tiny details. Some of it I don't remember, and some of it really isn't all that important anyway.
Needless to say I've grown up so much, It feels weird to reflect on so much and how fast it's happened but also how long it's been.
I ended up breaking up with Poss In 2010. Reasons were because he kept trying to say he wanted to marry me. He even bought an engagement ring which believe it or not infuriated me because he had no life goals. He kept trying to push marriage but he had no job no place of his own. He had no way of being a sustainable adult. What if we had a family? I couldn't rely on that. I wanted a future.
I ended up calling it off with him all together. But then Toole And I got to talking again.
If I'm being truly honest with myself, I've always known that I wanted to be with him anyway. He ended up flying out from California to meet me for the first time in North Carolina. Eventually he ended up moving to North Carolina to be with me. We got married in 2012 and in 2013 we bought our first home. We got a dog we named Patch and he is quite literally the best Pitbull you'll ever know. We've had some other dogs too but they didn't work out because...reasons.. But we bought a house, Toole (now the new Chris) got a job in management at Dollar Tree for a while. And we were doing really well there but when he found out that he was never going to get his own store in management, he decided to make a career change.
I was doing okay at Harris teeter for a few years but like most jobs, I got pigeon holed into a rut. I wasn't going anywhere with my job either. So my husband decided to take up truck driving. That first year was incredibly difficult. We had only been married for probably a year and a half or so when he started that career. He would be gone for 4 to 6 weeks at a time and I would only see him for about a week before he was gone again. That's probably the biggest struggle of my life not having him around. But I've always had Angie and my mom around. And Chris made some good friends while he was on the road too.
Eventually, when he got into his truck driving, his friend, Jon, offered him a job in Ohio to drive up to Canada. He would be driving from Columbus Ohio to Mississauga Ontario Canada every other day but he would be home much more often. After a year of him not being home as much as possible. I wanted that so bad. My family didn't want me to move from North Carolina but we knew there was no future in there for us. No career goals, nothing positive. It felt like everything was going backwards. So in 2016 we ended up moving to Ohio.
I into my first car accident and speeding ticket that year, not fun. But, ever since then, we've been much better. I did end up getting a job working at Dollar General for about 6 months. The manager they're absolutely loved me but I couldn't return the feeling. He was new to retail but he didn't want to listen to it suggestion when people offered it. I worked In retail for 12 years, not like I didn't know what I was doing.
Eventually I ended up leaving so that I could go on the road with Chris for a little while but I ended up looking for another job and it worked at public storage for about 7 or 8 months. It wasn't such a glamorous job. The pay was low, and it was incredibly boring and dangerous honestly. I hated being alone on a property at night because I knew that homeless people would hang out and storage units. I have nothing against homeless but some are dangerous And it's dangerous to be alone at night regardless of who you are.
I ended up leaving that job and I worked for a utility company in Columbus. I actually really love that job despite it being a temp job. I was there for almost 2 years where I actually felt like I was doing something I could be proud of. I made a friend there as well as public storage although I don't really see them all that much. Such as adult life. During that time, The pay was all right, but eventually I had to get a new job which sucks because I loved that one.
At the end of My time there , I got pregnant for the first time. It was short-lived. I ended up miscarrying at 6 weeks. It was probably one of the worst feelings I ever had experienced in my life. People kept saying that they were willing to talk to me but I didn't want to talk. My husband felt useless because he couldn't really console me. There was no consolation. I felt like my body was betraying me when I lost the baby. It was through no one's fault or anything like that but still, it felt that way. It was a very traumatic experience but I've made my peace with it now. That was in 2021, around September or August. By then I had been working with Forward air the company that contracts my husband now.
We had been trying for 6 years to conceive a baby by then, and I was ready to give up after the miscarriage and actually work with a fertility specialist to have a baby. The fertility specialist said that there really wasn't anything that was stopping me from having a baby but if necessary he would work with us. So I gave it a few more months and decided that at the start of 2022 I was going to go in hard with trying to have a baby. I was 34 by then and I was just tired of it.
November of that that year we got to go to Las Vegas. I forgot to mention that my brother moved away from North Carolina too and moved to Las Vegas with his son, yes my brother has a son. He's 10 years old now. He and his girlfriend (Not my nephew's mother) went on a cruise and we were just really overpaid babysitters.
When we got back, about a couple weeks later, I felt kind of funny and decided to check a pregnancy test again for whatever reason. This time I was pregnant pregnant. Everyone keeps saying that she was conceived in Vegas, she wasn't, I could pinpoint the exact day when she was 😂.
All the while, I was struggling at my new job at Forward Air. I felt like they never really trained me as well as they could have. There's a lot to learn and it's not that bad but when the workload is so overwhelming and you get dogged for asking for help even though they tell you to ask for help, it's just impossible. I ended up losing my job in March of last year because I kept making so many mistakes. It was overwhelming, everything was on a strict time constraint, but I was drowning in work. I don't miss that job, I don't even regret being fired for the first time ever in any of my jobs.
I've been a housewife since then. Although my pregnancy was very difficult. I was always sick and vomiting and lost a lot of weight during the process. But from the 6th week of my pregnancy onward, I could tell my baby was going to be strong and In March of last year we found out that we were having a baby girl.
The pictures I could tell you I've taken. Ever since she's been born, I've watched her grow and change. I ended up giving birth in August of 2022. And she is the perfect blend of me and her father.
We went through some struggles with her skin for a while. In fact I have a dermatologist appointment for her today, but now she's okay and healthy and happy and asleep in my lap.
And, well that's pretty much where we are today. I'm 36 years old, I'm a stay at home now, I've made some incredibly amazing and new friends especially my one from Canada. It's just been so much in such a long period of time and it's impossible to really go through all the tiny details. Some of it I don't remember, and some of it really isn't all that important anyway.
Needless to say I've grown up so much, It feels weird to reflect on so much and how fast it's happened but also how long it's been.