2011 and beyond
I love that this "livejournal" was still out in cyber space waiting for me to stumble back upon. It showed me how much I have grown and yet how some pieces of me have stayed the same. That is in some ways a relief as I have grown so much this last year (a result of self inflicted duress). There IS a core to me. There is something that stays whole in me that doesn't fade or change with the passing of time. Proof of a soul maybe? (side note: I posted an article about needing to kick diet soda (which I have) and being obsessed with Wonder Woman (she was my Halloween costume for 2010).
I have gone through a year of great struggle and pain to emerge a beautiful woman with fervor for life and hope. I have unwavering belief in myself and my self image is better than ever. I was divorced in 2010, in truth I married the wrong guy for the wrong reasons. I married that guy I mentioned (Paul) and had an awful divorce that left us both with scars. I made a lot of mistakes and coping with those mistakes and the repercussions, was the greatest gift I could have received though I did not see it at the time. It forced me to become a positive person, to work on my self esteem, to become completely independent again and to seek the right people in my life. I would never change that I went through it all, even the times when I was a topic of gossip and wasn’t even invited to a former friends birthday party, as he was invited instead. I learned that I won’t allow those type of people in my life again. My friends are now open minded, supportive, and forgiving. I can be human and it’s ok to make mistakes. That was a huge step because the people I surrounded myself with were unfortunately weak, insecure, and judgmental. We (my love Jason and I, yes I met someone amazing) have an AMAZING support system of friends. I have put to death friendships that I hung onto the past that were honestly not good for me and have learned to surround myself with positive, uplifting people that see the world as I do. Jason is also so supportive. He never once let's me put myself down and offers more emotional support then I ever thought that a mate could. I am in a very, very good place emotionally, physically, socially, etc. This is the best time of my life. I am so blessed!
"The Rabbit Chronicles" is really taking off. I stopped writing because I was sensitive to the criticism my ex husband gave me. I don’t think he really ever saw my potential. True, the writing I started in 2006 was lack-luster and weak. With a more expansive view of the world, I have picked the project back up and have written around 40 pages. It is MUCH better. It is a real book and I will publish it. I also bought a house this year and my new boyfriend and I will move in together in just a few weeks.
I have gone through a year of great struggle and pain to emerge a beautiful woman with fervor for life and hope. I have unwavering belief in myself and my self image is better than ever. I was divorced in 2010, in truth I married the wrong guy for the wrong reasons. I married that guy I mentioned (Paul) and had an awful divorce that left us both with scars. I made a lot of mistakes and coping with those mistakes and the repercussions, was the greatest gift I could have received though I did not see it at the time. It forced me to become a positive person, to work on my self esteem, to become completely independent again and to seek the right people in my life. I would never change that I went through it all, even the times when I was a topic of gossip and wasn’t even invited to a former friends birthday party, as he was invited instead. I learned that I won’t allow those type of people in my life again. My friends are now open minded, supportive, and forgiving. I can be human and it’s ok to make mistakes. That was a huge step because the people I surrounded myself with were unfortunately weak, insecure, and judgmental. We (my love Jason and I, yes I met someone amazing) have an AMAZING support system of friends. I have put to death friendships that I hung onto the past that were honestly not good for me and have learned to surround myself with positive, uplifting people that see the world as I do. Jason is also so supportive. He never once let's me put myself down and offers more emotional support then I ever thought that a mate could. I am in a very, very good place emotionally, physically, socially, etc. This is the best time of my life. I am so blessed!
"The Rabbit Chronicles" is really taking off. I stopped writing because I was sensitive to the criticism my ex husband gave me. I don’t think he really ever saw my potential. True, the writing I started in 2006 was lack-luster and weak. With a more expansive view of the world, I have picked the project back up and have written around 40 pages. It is MUCH better. It is a real book and I will publish it. I also bought a house this year and my new boyfriend and I will move in together in just a few weeks.