I'm going to try to put this into words...
So, about halfway through the read I started making a list of my thoughts. I backtracked a bit, but didn't want to bother with every fave thing Jacob had said to be written down as I was still being compelled by the Jacob Narrative of Awesomeness (which, unfortunately at the very end turned into the Jacob Narrative of "OHHHHHHH NOOOOOO (you didn't Stephenie Meyer)!!!!!
Here are those...keep in mind that I started out with kind of a residual Bella/Edward spark, apparently there was still some Twilight!happiness/hopefulness left in me. Idk either.
1) the thought of Edward, Emmett and Jasper bachelorparty!hunting makes me HOT
2) Renee, Phil, Charlie wedding <3 (and also...foil much?)
3) um...humans get bruises having sex with ONE ANOTHER...calm down o inexperienceds? (also: biting pillows?WTF?LOL!)
4) Allie is a mad genius (the BABY prediction)
5) um. Jacob <3HEART<3 comes back big time
6) Seth is so cute and awesome and on the right side, obvi
7) totally called Leah joining them (but I'm not too sure about her being the Beta later on, though I do think she and Jacob relating and being friends is great)
8) JACOB & ROSALIE ("Blondie") = literally rolling around on the bed laughing. more than once.
9) Jacob & Alice ("shortie") also pretty darn cute
10) I forgot to mention poor Leah (being a genetic dead end) and also the Sam pulling the "Lee-lee" line through Jared...so cruel. Imprinting is about the awfullest thing Stephenie Meyer ever created (right after this series...)
11) ALLIE IS A SUPER GENIUS (the BABY IMPRINT prediction)...who knew coming up with the most random and seemingly impossible shit while we waited was actually the way crackwhore SMeyer was going to go (ETA: actually I guess spoilers w/ teh info were all over the place, but I was shielding myself/my Jacob love community was good at keeping that stuff behind cuts)
12) the lack of free will (or characters abilities to exercise it or acknowledge its existence wrt their ultimate fate) disconcerts the crap out of me. and jake had been going in such a good direction.
13) Daybreak (in Nicole!verse that is)
14) omg Jacob just tell Bells already (and piss her the fuck off!) oh...HAHAHAHA. Bella, you are such an idiot. (But SMeyer still beats you for having the characters react too perfectly for everything, I mean, wanting to have the kid and have it be a kid I understand, but shouldn't Bella be better with this part of wolfiness by nao? I was hoping for some more interesting anger/issues...or at least not that whole "oh it was just this unborn kid that kept us such good friends" that is such bull, does experience count for nothing?! Oh wait, look who I'm talking to...)
15) okay well I called the self-control, skipping newborn thing LONG AGO
16) A solid decade of having sex Rosalie and Emmett??? VAMP ME UP! (shit, i just sounded like Bella)
17) um Emmett/Charlie bonding anyone? adorbs. except Emmett cracking the sex jokes. but let's face it, that'd be me.
18) also, is anyone getting ridic JKR deja vu in the naming department? (proof that Bella is one of the most immature "middle-aged characters" I've ever met, seriously, the way some adult authors wish the world would work)
19) Alice & Jasper?!
20) "Momma"? that's up there with "holy crow" (which I always modify in my brain to "holy cow")
21) Bella, why are you still so useless, stop sitting around and watching and figure out who the fuck J. Jenks is!
22) so, aoas (all of a sudden) everyone's got gifts!
23) it just goes on and on and on (and i feel reaaaaaal cheated by the lack o'action, although i guess i'm glad everyone lives. no really.)
24) Edward called Jake his son. Did anyone else just get real creeped out?
25) I want to see the Rosalie and Emmett kiss(es).
26) Sue and Charlie? Meh.
27) "SHE LIKED SPARKLY THINGS" gee, Bella, wonder where she gets that from Hold me back.
As for summation thoughts...disappointed, check. I am a character person, it's true, which is why I still love parts of this book (Rosalie, Emmett, Jacob, Charlie, the wolves) and yet, will also never forgive SMeyer for imprinting and assassinating the best part of Jacob.
The Bella character also just goes absolutely over my head. I mean, as frustrated as I got with her whinging and self-deprecation and self-worth issues, even in Eclipse I sometimes felt I could relate to her. Of course, then she become the bad-assest vamp and it's like all the formerly annoying things are cured...but she's still annoying. Obvi her character was meant to be Edward's forever love, but I'm still not satisfied once she's all-confident. There is just no win. Except that, it really makes you glad you're human and not a poorly equipped fictional character in a world with sparkly vampires.
Also, however, as plot-be-damned as I usually am, ridic sketchy plots do bug the hell out of me when they're this bad (also, the writing a lot of the time...I want SMeyer's "adult" [read: pretty decent] writing from The Host back). Twilight was self-contained and acceptable. New Moon's plot was pretty straightforward, if ultimately regrettable. Eclipse's was surprisingly tight, even though I didn't like the whole Victoria thing that much (although I'm glad there was action, at least, and therefore a point to it). This was just way too complicated, contrived and for nothing in my opinion, because it still ended with happily ever after for all. But, you kno, I really need to remind myself that it's not exactly like she was ever going for realistic here.