I want to be excited for Christmas...does that count for anything?
Things that I can expect from the upcoming month:
1. A HUGE HEADACHE.
2. Rinse & Repeat
Is it sad that I think I would probably have an awesome Christmas if I just...became a hermit and was allowed to just enjoy it in my own way? My mom just makes it...more difficult then it needs to be. She forgets that Christmas is about having family with you. Like that's the most important part to me at least.
I do try really hard to make Christmas the best day of the year. I try. I buy gifts for everyone. Like I make sure it is THE gift that they asked for or I do extra snooping to make sure that it is the gift they want. But in general giving is one of my favorite things to do during the holidays. I love Christmas music, and when I hear it on the radio I just get really happy. The happiness usually gets offset by some other catastrophe, but you know what when I do hear lyrics like "Chestnuts roasting on an open fire...Jack Frost nipping at your nose," I kind of squeal internally and just picture a world when I could have that Christmas. I just want to be happy. THAT'S ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS! And maybe a Kid Flash t-shirt, but I DON'T EVER ASK FOR MUCH!
I don't think I'll ever get over this show. You would think that the hiatus would have killed my interest in this show, but no. I wonder if I'm the only one? Like I'll just sit on my days off thinking about Young Justice, watching Young Justice, crying about Young Justice. And this is what my life has been reduced to. Oh, joy.
I was really just ready to throw my hands up in the air when season 2 aired. But wow...I have become attached to everyone. It's like being part of a big family. HOW STUPID OF ME!? And maybe that's why I love this series so much? Cause it's not about individual characters. It's about this great group of people who do great things and make me cry every day. LIKE HOW DARE YOU!?
I don't know. It's just become one of those shows where I could probably watch episodes on repeat and not ever once get bored. THIS IS WHAT MY LIFE HAS BECOME!
Also, is it horrible to feel guilty for writing a certain pairing over and over again? Like I almost expect people to just shout at me and tell me to get a life for writing all the Spitfire I do. And I try to include other characters and not focus on their relationship, but IT'S TOO GREAT NOT TO ACTUALLY WRITE ABOUT IT SO I JUST KIND OF FLING MY BODY TO THE WOLVES AND HOPE THEY ACCEPT ME AND MY OBSESSIONS.
So I got into a fight with my dad the other day. I'm never confrontational. EVER. Like I am all things that are not confrontational, and I NEVER EVER try to start a fight. But my dad...my dad HAS BEEN FUCKING STUPID. I love him even with all the crap he has put me and my family through, but I felt the need to call him out on his bullshit.
Essentially, he called me to tell me he went to the doctors. He then tells me that they said his diabetes is worse he needs to take insulin shots and that he refuses. He refuses to be compliant with diet and medicine. And he had the audacity to say it to me LIKE HE WAS SO FUCKING PROUD OF HIMSELF FOR MAKING THIS DECISION. And I just clawed at my eyes as I went ballistic on him.
LIKE HOW ELSE DO YOU WANT ME TO RESPOND TO YOU DAD!? Do you understand that you are essentially trying to kill yourself!? Do you want to get amputations? Do you want to cry as your eyes get worse and you go blind? MAN UP ALREADY! You've had five years to figure your life out when you left us, and your behavior is childish and I am done playing the adult/parent to the family. I WATCH CARTOONS FOR CHRIST'S SAKE AND PLAY WITH TOYS AND WRITE FANFICTION, AND I STILL HAVE A MORE ORGANIZED LIFE THAN YOU. Not to mention I am getting my second degree, working full time and going to school, so your bullshit will not cut it anymore. GROW UP!
He hung up on because I wasn't babying him or telling him what he wanted to here, which is laughable at best. But I haven't called him, and don't plan on it. Nope. I refuse. He didn't wish us anyone in my family a happy holiday either. And that's just low. It really is.
Am I sad? Of course. Do I want to help him? Yes. I would if he was willing to listen. However, he's not listening. He's being selfish, and I can't be stuck like this anymore. I JUST CAN'T. I have a future to look forward to without all this drama my family likes to drag me through. I'M NOT GOING TO BECOME THEM AND I WILL MAKE SOMETHING OF MYSELF.
Sorry for emotional dumping. I've just been highly irritated by this event, and needed to get it out in some form. This works for now.
1. A HUGE HEADACHE.
2. Rinse & Repeat
Is it sad that I think I would probably have an awesome Christmas if I just...became a hermit and was allowed to just enjoy it in my own way? My mom just makes it...more difficult then it needs to be. She forgets that Christmas is about having family with you. Like that's the most important part to me at least.
I do try really hard to make Christmas the best day of the year. I try. I buy gifts for everyone. Like I make sure it is THE gift that they asked for or I do extra snooping to make sure that it is the gift they want. But in general giving is one of my favorite things to do during the holidays. I love Christmas music, and when I hear it on the radio I just get really happy. The happiness usually gets offset by some other catastrophe, but you know what when I do hear lyrics like "Chestnuts roasting on an open fire...Jack Frost nipping at your nose," I kind of squeal internally and just picture a world when I could have that Christmas. I just want to be happy. THAT'S ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS! And maybe a Kid Flash t-shirt, but I DON'T EVER ASK FOR MUCH!
I don't think I'll ever get over this show. You would think that the hiatus would have killed my interest in this show, but no. I wonder if I'm the only one? Like I'll just sit on my days off thinking about Young Justice, watching Young Justice, crying about Young Justice. And this is what my life has been reduced to. Oh, joy.
I was really just ready to throw my hands up in the air when season 2 aired. But wow...I have become attached to everyone. It's like being part of a big family. HOW STUPID OF ME!? And maybe that's why I love this series so much? Cause it's not about individual characters. It's about this great group of people who do great things and make me cry every day. LIKE HOW DARE YOU!?
I don't know. It's just become one of those shows where I could probably watch episodes on repeat and not ever once get bored. THIS IS WHAT MY LIFE HAS BECOME!
Also, is it horrible to feel guilty for writing a certain pairing over and over again? Like I almost expect people to just shout at me and tell me to get a life for writing all the Spitfire I do. And I try to include other characters and not focus on their relationship, but IT'S TOO GREAT NOT TO ACTUALLY WRITE ABOUT IT SO I JUST KIND OF FLING MY BODY TO THE WOLVES AND HOPE THEY ACCEPT ME AND MY OBSESSIONS.
So I got into a fight with my dad the other day. I'm never confrontational. EVER. Like I am all things that are not confrontational, and I NEVER EVER try to start a fight. But my dad...my dad HAS BEEN FUCKING STUPID. I love him even with all the crap he has put me and my family through, but I felt the need to call him out on his bullshit.
Essentially, he called me to tell me he went to the doctors. He then tells me that they said his diabetes is worse he needs to take insulin shots and that he refuses. He refuses to be compliant with diet and medicine. And he had the audacity to say it to me LIKE HE WAS SO FUCKING PROUD OF HIMSELF FOR MAKING THIS DECISION. And I just clawed at my eyes as I went ballistic on him.
LIKE HOW ELSE DO YOU WANT ME TO RESPOND TO YOU DAD!? Do you understand that you are essentially trying to kill yourself!? Do you want to get amputations? Do you want to cry as your eyes get worse and you go blind? MAN UP ALREADY! You've had five years to figure your life out when you left us, and your behavior is childish and I am done playing the adult/parent to the family. I WATCH CARTOONS FOR CHRIST'S SAKE AND PLAY WITH TOYS AND WRITE FANFICTION, AND I STILL HAVE A MORE ORGANIZED LIFE THAN YOU. Not to mention I am getting my second degree, working full time and going to school, so your bullshit will not cut it anymore. GROW UP!
He hung up on because I wasn't babying him or telling him what he wanted to here, which is laughable at best. But I haven't called him, and don't plan on it. Nope. I refuse. He didn't wish us anyone in my family a happy holiday either. And that's just low. It really is.
Am I sad? Of course. Do I want to help him? Yes. I would if he was willing to listen. However, he's not listening. He's being selfish, and I can't be stuck like this anymore. I JUST CAN'T. I have a future to look forward to without all this drama my family likes to drag me through. I'M NOT GOING TO BECOME THEM AND I WILL MAKE SOMETHING OF MYSELF.
Sorry for emotional dumping. I've just been highly irritated by this event, and needed to get it out in some form. This works for now.